Movin Way Too Fast
by nessalyn
Summary: What happens when Jude goes on tour, with Kwest, not Tommy? During concerts are great, but what happens afterwards? TommyJude
1. Chapter 1

_Authors Note: Okay everyone, since I'm a total dork, I accidentally screwed up my chapters with my story, and ended up deleting it. This is still the original "Movin' Way Too Fast"...same writing, same author, the only difference is that the chapters might be split up a little bit. _

Jude was sitting on her bed, rethinking the night's events. It was supposed to be such a great night. Her sweet sixteenth! But, there had been nothing sweet about it. She had been so excited to see her boyfriend Shay. He had been touring for a month already, and she hadn't seen him since he had left. But, instead of coming home with hugs and kisses, he had dropped a bombshell on her. He had hooked up with her rival, Eden, while he was touring. She could have never have imagined how humiliating it could be when your boyfriend breaks up with you in front of the press.

She then looked over at the leather jack that hung on a chair by her desk. Tommy...he had followed her out into the alley after she ran away from Shay. Tears poured from her sad green eyes, just thinking about it. He had kissed her, then took it back. Hurt by two guys in less than fifteen minutes, that had to be a new record.

The next morning Jude woke up and the memories flooded back to her. How could she go back to G Major and face everyone?

She finally pulled herself out of bed and dressed in a pair of worn jeans and a black tanktop. She walked the five blocks to G Major and was greeted by Georgia as soon as she walked through the door.

"Jude you really don't need to be here today," she started.

"I need to be here Georgia. I'll have to face everyone sometime or another."

"Okay...EJ is working on damage control, but I don't think it's going to help much." She saw a worried look come over Jude. "This is big Jude, the press lives on this stuff."

"I know, but," Jude trailed off as she saw one of G Major's employees reading a tabloid. The front page had a picture of Jude slapping Shay with a heading on top of it: 'S- to the H- to the A- to the Y Breaks up with Feisty Instant Star for garden of EDEN'

Georgia quickly grabbed the magazine and threw it in the trash. "It'll be okay Jude," she said sympathetically. "Tommy and Kwest are ready for you in Studio B."

"Great," she muttered as she made her way to the door.

"Hey," Kwest said as he gave her a quick hug. "Sorry about last night."

"Thanks Kwest, but I'll be okay. I'm tough, right?" she said as she brushed Tommy off and walked into the recording booth.

Kwest gave Tommy a 'what the hell' look and Tommy just shrugged.

"Look Tommy, I know something else happened last night."

"Why do you think that?"

"Oh, no reason. Just that Jude totally iced you out man."

Tommy sneered at Kwest's sarcasm as Jude chimed in. "Ladies if you're done with tea time, I'd really like to get started," she said sarcastically.

Jude was trying to sing a song her and Tommy had wrote together but it just wasn't working. She couldn't concentrate, especially on something Tommy had helped with.

"Jude, why don't we take a break?" Kwest said over the intercom.

"Yeah, thanks," she said as she laid her guitar on the chair. She started to make her way to the mini kitchen when Tommy grabbed her arm.

"What's going on?" he demanded.

"I'm just not feeling the song," she said as she yanked her arm away, and kept walking.

"That's not what I meant," Tommy said.

She popped the tab on the soda she had grabbed from the fridge. "Well then I don't know what you're talking about."

"Don't play dumb Jude!"

"What? I'm doing exactly what you told me to do last night. I'm forgetting last night ever happened!"

"That is no reason to give me the cold shoulder!"

"Oh yeah? You don't go around kissing girls and then telling them that it shouldn't have happened and to forget it," said Jude, who was almost in tears.

"I'm sorry Jude! You think I didn't want that kiss to happen?"

"I don't know what to think Tommy!"

"Everything okay in here?" Georgia asked as she opened the door a crack.

"Yeah, just peachy," Jude said as she walked out of the room and slammed the door behind her.

"Mind telling me what happened Quincy?" Georgia asked as she walked into the room.

"Nothing, I just told her that Shay was a loser," Tommy tried to cover up.

Georgia eyed him curiously before she walked out of the room.

He let out a sigh of relief as he Georgia left and he saw Kwest open the door.

"You kissed her?"

"You know?"

"Well the walls aren't exactly as soundproof as they should be man."

"Shit!"

"Tommy, you can't keep doing this to her."

"Come on man! Do you think I want this? Do you think I'm glad that the only girl I have eyes for is sixteen?"

"Of course you aren't. But, what are you gonna do about it?"

"I don't know yet," Tommy said as he walked back into the studio. He saw her sitting in the recording booth, strumming on her guitar. She hadn't noticed that he was watching her. She looked so hurt, yet so strong. He hit the intercom button and listend to her music.


	2. Chapter 2

Her strong voice came over the speakers." Damn she sounds good," Tommy said aloud, not realizing she could hear him.

Her head popped up and she looked at Tommy. She was sixteen, and he was 23, but she still loved him. Even after everything he had pulled on her.

"Uh, that sounded really good girl," Tommy said breaking the silence.

"Thanks," she said quietly as she scribbled on the sheet of paper in front of her.

Tommy made his way into the recording booth and sat down in front of her.

"Jude, listen to me. I can see how much I hurt you, but I didn't mean to."

"And that makes it all better? Tommy, it was bad enough that Shay left me for Eden. When you kissed me, it, it changed everything. I didn't care about Shay then, but you made me say it never happened."

"I know. I shouldn't have made you do that, which is why I'm going to leave for awhile."

"What? Why?"

"I just need to get away, to be able to think, that's all. Kwest will finish your album."

"This is crap Quincy! Ya know what? Leave, I don't care anymore. If you want to run, go ahead and run!" she screamed as she stormed out of G Major and sat on the front steps. How could he do this to her? She kept getting hurt again and again, and Tommy was always the stem of things.

She quickly wiped the tears from her eyes as she saw Shay's black Lexus pull up. "Great, just what I need," she muttered.

"Hey shorty," Shay said nonchalantly.

"Shut-up Shay!"

"Jeez shorty, got a little temper problem there?"

"Leave me alone Shay!"

"No way!"

"What did you just say?" Jude glared at him.

"No, what happened Shorty?"

"Shay, you broke up with me last night, I don't exactly feel like spilling my feelings to you today."

"Just because I broke up with you doesn't mean I don't care," Shay said as he sat down beside her. "So where'd you run to last night?"

"I'd rather not tell you," Jude said as she looked out into the street.

"Well, by how you're acting I'm gonna guess it has to do with Little Tommy Q."

Tommy watched Jude talking to Shay. He wanted to rip the guy to pieces, but he knew he had hurt her just as much, if not more than he had.

Jude realized she was about to talk to Shay...about Tommy! "Shay, you need to leave," she said as she stood up.

"What?"

"Just, go okay."

"I see, you got little Tommy Q wrapped around your finger already, so there's no need for me anymore!"

"No! Tommy is the farthest thing from my mind," Jude lied.

Tommy winced as he heard Jude's last statement. It had hit home, and it hurt. Jude was like his drug, he was addicted, and every time he got too close, something bad happened.

"Sure he is Jude. I saw you two go out into the alley."

"Yeah? So what? You don't own me Shay."

Tommy couldn't stand by and watch Shay rip her ego to shreds.

"Shay-Shay I think that's enough."

"Oh look, if it isn't little Tommy Q., " he said as he stood up. "This isn't over shorty," He walked back to his Lexus and sped off down the road.

"I didn't need your help," Jude retorted as she walked back into G Major.

"Jude there is press everywhere! Do you want more headlines in the tabloids? I'm just protecting you!"

"Tommy, the only person I need protection from is you!" With that she walked into Studio A and locked the door behind her."I know, but," Jude trailed off as she saw one of G Major's employees reading a tabloid. The front page had a picture of Jude slapping Shay with a heading on

"Hey, " she heard a voice say.

"Oh, sorry Kwest. I didn't think anyone was in here."

"Don't worry about it Jude. Lemme guess Quincy problems?"

"Y...you know?"

"Yeah, I heard you and Tommy fighting."

"Great," she said as she sunk into a large lounge chair by Kwest.

"Listen, Jude I don't know if you want my advice or not but I'm going to give it to you anyway. He loves you Jude." He saw the immediate doubting look on Jude's face. "Hey I'm serious here. There's been other girls, don't get me wrong, but he';s never acted like this before."

"Then why is he being like this?"

"Because he knows he can't have you Jude. You're 16, he's 23."

"Then, why did he kiss me?"

"I don't know Jude, I can't answer that. You have to talk to him," Kwest finished.

Judes cellphone started ringing just as Kwest finished, "Hello."

"Hey Jude."

"Hi Jamie."

"How are you doing?" he asked awkwardly.

"Alright I guess."

Kwest took that as his cue to leave. He debated wether or not to find Tommy, but finally decided against it.

"I'm guessing you seen the tabloids?" Jamie asked.

"A few. Shay stopped by too."

"What?"

"Yeah," Jude said as she set her feet on top of the recording council.

"Is he crazy?" Jamie asked.

"Yeah, probably.

"Kat and I are going out tonight. Want to come with?"

"Nah, I'm not big on the whole third wheel thing. Besides, I'm gonna sit in my room and pig out on pizza and ice cream."

Jamie laughed a little. "Okay, if you change your mind call us."

"Okay. I'll talk to you later Jamie."

"Bye."

Jude put her phone back into her pocket and walked into the lobby of G Major.

"Why don't you go home Jude?" Georgia asked.

"Because what am I going to do at home?"

"Going point. Look, Darius called a little bit ago.

"What did he want."

"Shay wants you to apologize to him...on national television."

"What? What did I do to him? Shouldn't he be apologizing to me?"

"Do want to do it?"

"No way!"

"What's going on?" Tommy asked.

Jude quickly turned around. "Nothing!"

"Whoa, Jude calm down, I know your not all hyped about Shay's great idea, but no reason to take it out on Tommy."

"I know, sorry," she said rigidly.

"Okay, that was the bad news. The good news is we think you should go on tour."

"What? That's great!" Jude said, her voice filled with excitement.

"Yeah, great," Tommy said as he filed out of the room.

Jude noticed Tommy had left, but she was so excited about the thought of a tour, she didn't really care.

Tommy got into his blue Viper and drove to his house. He put together a few of his belongings and shoved them in a duffel bag. He had to get away. He had to get away from everything, especially Jude. For a split second he thought about how much his leaving would hurt her, but then he thought of how good this tour would be for her. Maybe she'd meet a guy her own age.

He hauled the bag in his car and started to drive to his family's secluded beach house.


	3. Chapter 3

"What?" Jude screamed to Kwest at G Major the next day.

"He's gone Jude. Left last night."

"He can't be," she said quietly as she held back her tears.

"I'm sorry Jude. I didn't know anything about it. I got home last night and there was a message from Tommy on my machine."

"Wh...what did he say?" Jude asked as a few tears silently slipped from her eyes.

"He said he was leaving, but he didn't know for how long, and that he would be in touch," Kwest said as he noticed she was crying. He gently pulled her into a brotherly hug.

"He left because of me didn't he?" she said as she pulled away from Kwest.

"He doesn't want to hurt you Jude."

"That's all I ever hear Kwest! He doesn't want to hurt me, or he never meant it to happen this way."

Georgia walked into the room and saw Jude's tear-stained face. "I'm guessing you heard the news already?"

Jude nodded and ran out of the room. She didn't want to lose it in from of Georgia, she couldn't.

"He's really screwed it up this time hasn't he?" Georgia asked Kwest.

"I, uh, don't know what you're talking about."

"We're not blind around here Kwest. We know there's been something between Tommy and Jude since the beginning."

"Oh, well then, yeah, he has. He's really hurt her."

"Make sure you keep an eye on her Kwest. I don't want her doing anything she shouldn't be doing."

"Got it."

Tommy arrived at the cabin and hauled his stuff to the loft. The house hadn't been changed since his Mom and younger sister were killed. There was still the same furniture and the hideous green carpet she had always hated. So many memories of family vacations came flooding back to him. His father hadn't been a bitter old man, and his brother hadn't blamed him back then. Everything was better for the most part.

He slowly made his way to the liquor cabinet and poured himself a strong cocktail. She was everything to him, and he couldn't do a damn thing about it! "Come on Quincy, pull it together. She's just a kid," he told himself. But, in his heart he knew she was more of an adult than he was.

Jude ran to the bathroom and leaned against the wall. She let the tears flow freely. Sure, she was mad at Tommy for kissing her, but that didn't mean he had to leave.

"Jude," Kwest called as he knocked on the door. "Are you okay in there?"

"Yeah, just great," she managed to say through her tears.

"Can I come in?"

"It's the girls bathroom Kwest."

"I'm perfectly aware of that Jude," he said as he walked into the bathroom and saw Jude sitting in a corner. He walked towards her and crouched down beside her.

"He could have at least said goodbye," Jude sobbed.

It pained Kwest to see her like this. She was like his little sister. "I know, but I suppose he thought if he'd say goodbye you would talk him out of leaving.

Kwest let her cry on his shoulder until the calmed down a bit.

"I'm sorry for falling apart on you like that Kwest."

"Don't worry about it. I'll always be here for you. You're like my little sister."

Jude laughed a little. "We should probably get back to work big brother," she joked.

"Definitely lil sis," he said as he helped her up off the floor and put his arm around her.

"Do you think he'll come back?"

"I don't know Jude. It's Tommy we're tlaking about For all we know he's on his way back already."

Tommy sat in the rocking chair beside the picture window. It had been his Mom's favorite spot in the entire house. She would sit there for hours at a time, usually reading a book.

He thought about his family. Not only did his Father and brother blame him for her untimely death, he blamed himself. Kwest had told him over and over again that it hadn't been his fault, but even six years later he still thought it was.

The ring of the telephone brought him away from his thoughts and back to reality.

"Hello."

"Hey man, it's Kwest."

"How're things?" tommy asked.

"She took it pretty hard man. She cried for over an hour."

"Shit. DId you tell her anything?"

"Just that you left. I don't know why you insist on doing this. It's killing her."

"This is for her Kwest. We can't be together. I talked to Portia today."

"You...talked to Portia?"

"Yeah, she's going to stop by G Major and talk to Jude."

"Man, that is such a bad idea."

"Whatever, listen I have to go. Take care of Jude."

"Will do."

"See ya."

Kwest turned off his cell and looked at Jude in the recording booth. He knew there was so much more to this than Tommy was letting on.

"So are we done yet?" Jude said as she walked into the room. "

"Uh, yeah sure. Tomorrow we really need to get down to business though."

"I could just stay late...I mean if I go home, I'll just think of Tommy. That is, unless you don't want to stay."

"Nah, it's fine. So got some lyrics we can set down?"

"Sort of, I'm just kind of going with it," she said as she pulled a piece of paper out of her back pocket and handed it to Kwest.

"Wow, Jude this is really good," he said as he finished reading it.

"Thanks," Jude turned around when she heard the clink of the door opening.

"Kwest, I haven't seen you in forever!" a tall black woman walked towards Kwest and hugged him. She was pretty, long black hair, with chocolate brown eyes.

"Portia," Jude said under her breath. Tommy's beautiful ex-wife. Portia had been nice to Jude when they had met, but seeing her just brought back the whole image of Tommy, and it didn't help her mood.

"Yeah, it's been a long time Portia. Probably too long," Kwest said as he hugged the woman back.

"It has, it really has been," Portia said as she turned around to face Jude."Hey girl."

"Hi Portia, it's good to see you."

"You too. You've grown up a lot since I saw you last."

"Yeah, it's been a tough few months."

"Kwest is it okay if I talk to Jude alone?" Portia asked.

"Yeah, sure. I'm going to go grab a cup of coffee," he said as he walked out the door.

"I heard about Tommy leaving," Portia said. "I know how close you two are."

"Were, not are, were. He left and he didn't even tell me, and I don't even care where he is," Jude rambled on.

"Yes you do."

"What?"

"You care about Tommy. It doesn't surprise me. I mean Little Tommy Q has made women fall to his feet all over the world."

"It's not like that Portia."

"I know. Your not just some other girl. Tommy really cares about you."

"How do you know?" Jude asked with a bit of surpressed anger.

"He called me and told me I should come talk to you."

"Great, now he has other people doing his dirty work."

"Hold on Jude. He wanted me to come tell you he was okay, and he wanted you to know that he doesn't deserve you."

"As much as I wish that helped. It doesn't. Not even close. He hasn't even been gone a week Portia and I miss him to death."

"I know you do," Portia said as she put her hand on Jude's shoulder. "I did too. The first month after we had gotten divorced, I thought I was going to lose it. Everytime I was around Darius he talked trash about Tommy and every tabloid I picked up had a picture of him and some other girl. I know he didn't mean to hurt me, but he did."

"So, what you're saying is that it'll get better?" Jude said with a look of wonderment.

"Yeah, I guess."

"You drove 500 miles to tell me that?" Jude said as she smiled.

"Yeah," Portia laughed. "Plus I really wanted to hang out with the girl that has Tommy confused. I didn't think it could be done."

"I confuse him? What should I say?"

"That's a good question Jude, one you'll have to ask him when he comes back."

"He's coming back?" Judes eyes lit up.

"I don't know, but I'm sure you'll see him again."

"Jude, we really need to record that song or Georgia's gonna flip," Kwest walked in carrying a powdered doughnut.

"Okay okay," she said as she made her way to the recording booth.

She was setting her things up when Portia turned to Kwest. "What does he think he's doing to her?"

"I really don't know," Kwest answered. "But, I do know that it's not anything good. She's going to break, it's just a matter of when."

"Are we ready?" Jude asked.

"Yeah, go for it girl."


	4. Chapter 4

_The words you said _

_Were never true_

_You never cared_

_No, you never cared. _

_You left me, _

_Broken and alone. _

_My life falling to pieces_

_With no one there to pick them up_

_What did I do_

_To make you leave_

_Without saying goodbye?_

_Is it my fault?_

_What did I do? _

_You left me, _

_Broken and alone. _

_My life falling to pieces_

_With no one there to pick them up_

Jude finished the song with an E chord and tears streaming down her face.

"It needs a little work, but I like it," Kwest said as he walked into the booth and handed her a tissue.

"I really like it Jude, nice work," Portia said. "But I really should get going, sorry to make this a short visit," she said as she hugged Jude.

"It's okay, and thanks for coming."

"Don't worry about it. Anytime you need me, just call."

"Thanks," Jude said as Portia walked out of the room and out of the building.

She quickly wiped the smeared eye-liner away and turned to Kwest. "Kwest I need someone to go on tour with me as like a chaperone. I was planning on asking Sadie or Tommy, but do you want to go with?"

"Sure Jude, that would rock."

"Awesome."

_3 Weeks Later_

"Yes, I promise to call Jamie. I'll be fine," Jude hugged her best fried as she was about to board her tour bus.

"Jude, we really need to get going," Kwest said as he looked at his watch.

"Okay okay," she said as she gave Kat, Jamie, Sadie, and her Mom one last hug.

They had been driving for almost an hour when Kwest came and sat by her.

"Ya know, you're supposed to at last act happy on your first tour."

"I am," she started.

"But you wish Tommy were here," Kwest finished for her.

Jude looked over at him, "Yeah. I mean I thought if anything would bring him back it would be my tour."

Tommy had been gone for a month and Jude hadn't heard from him since he had left. She hadn't even heard anything about him since Portia had visited the studio. It still hurt so bad to know he didn't care. Kwest and Portia insisted he did, but Jude knew better.

"I know red, but now you're just stuck with me on this tour," Kwest joked.

"However will I survive?" Jude threw back and smiled.

It was one of the first times Kwest had seen her smile since Tommy left. He was keeping in touch with Kwest, but made him swear he wouldn't tell Jude. The first two weeks he was gone she had asked at least twice a day if he had heard from Tommy and every day he had lied. The truth was that Tommy called at least two times a day just to see how Jude was.

"Are you excited for tonight? First big concert of the tour. I heard it was sould out over a month ago."

"Sort of, I 'm more nervous than anything I guess."

"That's normal Jude. I know you'll do great," Kwest said.

"Thanks."

"And here she is! Instant Star, Jude Harrison!"

She walked confidently onto the stage. The screaming fans, bright lights, she loved this. She quickly scanned the crowd. She was hoping Tommy would be there, but she saw nothing.

She sang the remix of Skin, Your 21, Pick Up The Pieces, That Girl, Temporary Insanity and finished with 24 Hours. She walked back into her makeshift dressing room. The rush of performing had drifted away and now she felt empty.

"Hey Red! Awesome job out there," Kwest congratulated her.

"Thanks," she said in monotone as she brushed the curls from her hair.

"You don't seem too excited about it Jude. What's up?" Kwest asked even though he already knew the answer.

Jude looked up at Kwest, her eyes gleaming with tears. "What do you think Kwest? It's Tommy, who else can make me fall apart like this?"

"I kind of figured it was him."

"I just wish he would call or write or something," Jude said as she held back tears.

"I know Jude," Kwest said as he brushed a few loose hairs away from her face. "Why don't you go back to the hotel, take a shower, and get some rest. I'll send some room service up."

"Okay. Thanks Kwest," he started to walk away.

"Wait, Kwest has he..."

"No," Kwest said as he schook his head.  
"Thought so," she said as she walked towards the door and got on the tour bus.

Kwest watched the bus drive away ahd heard the sing song rythym of his cell phone.

"Kwest here."

"How'd it go?" the voice asked.

"Concert, great, after concert, not so great."

"What do you mean? Is she okay?" Tommy asked, his voice full of worry.

"She misses you man. She needs you here. I'm really worried about her Tommy."

"She'll be fine. She's strong," he said more for his benefit than Kwest's.

"I really hope your right Tommy."

Jude got back to the hotel and took a hot shower. She didn't know what to do with herself. Kwest's room service had already been delievered and she had picked at the cheeseburger and fries, but she had no appetite. She'd only been gone for a day, but she felt so alone. At one time she had talked to Tommy about her first tour, he had said he was going to be there through it all. But, here she was, all alone.

She walked into the bathroom, grabbed a razor from her make-up bag, and walked back to her bed. She rolled up her right sleeve and touched the cold blade to her skin lightly, then sliced a small cut into her arm. A small gasp was emitted as she felt the stinging pain and saw a few drops of crimson blood fall down her wrist. The pain satisfied her loneliness in ways Tommy should have.

She made a few more cuts and then made her way to wash her arm and put the blade away. A bottle of prescription pills caught her eye and she quickly swallowed three.

"Jude, are you alright in there?" Kwest asked as he knocked on the door.

"yeah, I'm fine. I uh just got out of the shower," Jude lied.

"Okay, I'll leave you alone then."

"Okay, see you tomorrow Kwest," she replied as she crawled into bed.


	5. Chapter 5

The pills and cutting became an after concert ritual for Jude. She would perform her set and rush back to the hotel. cut a little, pop some pills, and fall into a fitful sleep. She acted happy but withdrawn when she was in public. Her performances recieved rave reviews, but she still wasn't happy.

Kwest walked into Jude's dressing room one night after a performance to check if she had left anything when he had found the empty bottles. Two empty bottles of prescription Oxycontin. He knew he should call Jude out on it, but he knew she'd just deny it.

It had been a little over two months since Tommy had left and a month into her tour. With each passing day the knife of pain was wrenched into her heart deeper. She knew Kwest was keeping something about Tommy from her, she just didn't know what.

About two and a half months into her tour, she was told she would have to perform with Shay the next night.

"No way!" Jude cried "I won't do it!"

"You have to Jude. Georgia's hands are tied and Darius wants more PR for Shay," Kwest tried to explain.

"I don't care if Shay needs a kidney I won't do it!" Jude yelled.

"I know you don't want to, but you have no choice."

"So you're saying tomorrow I have to sing with Shay?"

"Yes," Kwest said with a defeated look. "We'll make it the first song so you can get it over with."

"Fine," she stomped off to her room and threw herself onto her bed.

Kwest pulled out his cell phone and called Tommy.

"Hey Kwest what's goin on?" he saked in a cheery voice.

"Look Tommy. You need to get your shit together and get your ass to Montreal!"

Tommy knew something was up when Kwest swore, he never used bad language. "What's so important?"

"Somethings wrong with Jude."

"What? I just talked to you this morning!"

"First off, she has to perform with Shay tomorrow night and I really think you should be there."

"Okay, what else?"

"I keep finding empty pill bottles Tommy. Everywhere, in her rooms, on the bus, backstage."

"What?" Tommy said, his voice filled with concern and rage.

"I don't know what to do Tommy. If I call her out on it she'll just deny it."

"Wow," Tommy said as he paced his living room.

"You need to talk to her or be here, just do something instead of hiding."

"I'm not hiding Kwest!"

"Bullshit Tommy. You care about Jude and it scares the hell out of you"

"That's not the only reason I left. My brother came back to town and I didn't want to face him."

"Either way you ran and your hiding Tommy."

"I know Kwest," Tommy said as he sat down in a chair. "So what do you want me to do Kwest? You know she hates me because I left."

"Then why does she ask me if you called me everyday, and everyday I have to lie to her?"

"I don't know. Maybe I'll come to the concert in Montreal. I'm only about fifteen minutes away."

"Good."

"Not so good Kwest. I don't know what's going to happen when I see her."

"Don't worry Tommy. Look I have to go figure out what's going on tomorrow night."

"Alright, thanks."

"Anytime."

Jude sat on the bathroom floor with a razor in her hand. Tears poured from her eyes as she made quick slices on her arms.

"Jude can we talk?"

She gasped as she heard Shay's voice.

"No!" she yelled back.

Shay used the key Darius had given him and opened the door. He saw the bathroom light on and opened the door. He was shocked at the sight he saw. Jude was standing over the sink washing blood off her arm.

"Jude."

"Shay, get out!"

"No way Shorty! What are you doing?"

"Nothing," she said as she quickly rolled her sleeve down her arm.

Shay grabbed her arm and she winced. He gently rolled her sleeve up. What he saw disturbed him. "Why Jude? Why are you doing this?"

"I miss him," she said as she fell apart.

Shays muscular arms wrapped around her small frail body as he held her tight. Her sobs rang through the room. "It's going to be okay Shorty," he said as he smoothed her hair.


	6. Chapter 6

The next night Tommy drove to Montreal, bought a dozen red roses, and planned on sitting front row and center to surprise Jude.

She sat in front of the mirror in her dressing room. She had already locked her door and she was now staring at the blade sitting on the bureau and the bottle of pills she held in her hand. Shay had told her she needed to stop, and she promised she would just to get him to leave her alone. But, he didn't know what it was like. He didn't know how it felt to have no one. To have literally no family. A few people were knocking on the door and calling her name, but she ignored them. She reached for her cell phone and turned it off. She didn't need that interrupting her too. She blocked everything from her mind. She wasn't thinking of the broken family she had left, or the thousands of people in the crowd screaming her name. She wasn't even thinking about Tommy.

She emptied the contents of the bottle into her hand and quickly swallowed them. She then took the razor and made a few tiny cuts on her left arm. Deep crimson blood slid down her wrist and dripped onto the bright white carpeting. She had become immune to the pain it caused. She felt nothing as the cool, silver blade plunged through her skin. She kept cutting until she hit a vein in her wrist. She felt dizzy and fell to the floor.

Tommy was standing amidst the screaming fans. He quickly looked at his watch. Jude should have been on stage already.

"Jude let me in!" Kwest screamed as he banged on the door. When he recieved no answer he kicked down the door. "Oh my god, Jude!"

Tommy's patience was wearing thin when Darius came out and grabbed the microphone. "Due to complications, Jude Harrison will not be performing tonight. We are very sorry for the inconveniance."

Tommy quickly made his way through the crowd and walked backstage. He saw people crowded around the dressing room.

"Tommy,somethings wrong," Kwest said as he made his way out of the room.

"What? Where's Jude?" Tommy asked.

"She's in there," Kwest motioned towards the dressing room.

Tommy plowed his way through the crowd and was horrified at what he saw. Jude, his Jude was lying on the floor covered in blood. He rushed over to her, knelt down beside her and grabbed her hand. He saw where the majority of blood had come from. Large cuts were etched in her arm. He picked her up and held her in his arms. She felt so light. She had lost weight since he had left. He knew this was his fault. He should have listened to Kwest's wranings.

"Tommy," Kwest put his hand on his shoulder. "You need to let the paramedics take her to the hospital."

"Yeah," Tommy simple said as he gently laid her onto the backboard. He was in a daze. The one girl he had true feelings for could die because of his actions.

"Tommy let's go to the hospital. I'll drive," Kwest said.

Tommy and Kwest walked towards the Viper. Kwest was worried he would protest him driving the car, but he simply tossed Kwest the keys and opened the passenger door.

"Tommy she'll be alright," Kwest said as they started driving.

"I should have listend to you Kwest but instead I had to be selfish. She could die because of me."

"She won't die," Kwest said quietly.

"Did you see how much blood there was? What about the empty prescription bottle? It was issued yesterday! Who knows how much she took."

"I know. I tried to stop her Tommy but she had the door locked and dead bolted. By the time I got the door open she was already passed out."

"She had her cell phone off," Tommy randomly stated.

"What?"

"I tried calling her before the show and nobody answered. I figured she was just getting ready."

"Tommy you cna't blame yourself," Kwest said as he parked the car at Haven General Hospital.

"I will always blame myself," Tommy said as he got out of the car and started walking toward the sliding doors.

He was directed to the ICU. He saw Jude laying on a white bed in a secluded room. She looked like an angel. Her red hair splayed out on the pillow. Thoughts ran through his head, "Why would she do this? How could she do this?" It made no sense. Jude was always so happy, so vibrant.

"Are you a family member?" a nurse asked Tommy.

"I'm," he thought for a moment. I'm her fiance."

"You can go sit with her if you'd like."

"Thank you," he said. "How is she?"

"I'll be quite frank with you Mr..."

"Quincy."

"Mr Quincy, she's not doing so well. We've pumped her stomach so most of the prescription drugs are out of her system, but we're not sure what kind of damage they've already done. Plus, she's lost a lot of blood."

Tommy's eyes widened and glistened with the beginning of tears. "Thank you," he said as he walked into Jude's room.

He made his way to a chair and pulled it up beside the bed. He reached for her hand and held it tightly, as if he never wanted to let go.

"She loves you ya know," came Sadie Harrison's voice. She was crying freely but her voice sounded eerily strong and calm.

"Hi Sadie," he said looking up.

"Kwest called me. I was in Montreal and I was going to go see her after the concert."

"Oh."

"She's really done a number on herself hasn't she Mr. Fiance?" Sadie said as she sat in a chair.

"I...I didn't know what else to say Sadie. I needed to see her."

"Don't worry about it Tommy. You've only been gone for four months. Why did you come back?" Sadie asked, her voice thick with sarcasm. "Did you want to see how she's self destructed while on tour or did you want to see how much weight she's lost because of those damn pills!"

"Calm down Sadie. You know I'd never hurt Jude on purpose."

"No! Ya know Tommy, every day she called home and asked if I'd heard from Tommy. Every day I had to tell her no and hear her choke up and end the call."

"I didn't know this would happen Saide. I left for her!"

"Look where it got her Tommy! You really helped her!"

"I screwed up Sadie! I know that and I weill never forgive myself," Tommy said with tears in his eyes. "I would never hurt Jude on purpose. It wasn't supposed to happen like this. She was supposed to meet someone her own age on tour, not try to kill herself."

"She never wanted someone else Tommy. Since she won the contest, it's always been you. I'm going to get a cup of coffee or something. Do you want anything?"

"No thanks," Tommy said.


	7. Chapter 7

Tommy held Jude's hand as tears spilled from his steely blue eyes. The last time he had cried was when his Mom and his sister had died.

"Jude, I know you can hear me. I'm sorry Jude. I left so you could be happy. I never thought you would do this. If I could I would take everything back," he said as he started to sing.

_Your eyes are holding up the sky, _

_Your eyes make me weak I don't know why. _

_Your eyes make me scared to tell the truth_

_I thought my heart was bullet-proof_

_And everybody knows I'm into you. _

_"_Please Jude. Don't leave me. I can't lose you too. Let me see those eyes again."

Jude still lay lifeless on the bed.

"Hey," a voice came from the doorway.

"Shay," Tommy said as he looked up.

"The one and only. How is she?"

"Not so good," Tommy said in monotone. He didn't have the energy or desire to insult and yell at Shay.

"She promised me she'd stop," Shay said absentmindedly.

"You knew?"

"I found her last night in her room. She told me she would stop."

"You knew and you didn't tell anyone?"

"Why tell someone and ruin things for her if she promised to stop?" Shay said, raising his voice.

"You don't believe promises like that! She needed help!"

"What was I supposed to do? It's not as if you were helping her. You weren't even around."

"You two need to knock it off and act like adults," Sadie ordered as she handed coffee to the two of them. "I don't need this and neither does Jude!"

Tommy and Shay's faces turned grim and they looked like they had the fear of God put into them.

Each day was an exact repeat of the last for Tommy. Each morning Shay, Sadie, and himself would grab some breakfast from the cafeteriaand he would go and sit with Jude while he held her hand. Around noon Sadie or Shay would usually bring in lunch and then towards evening they would go to the hotel while Tommy stayed in Jude's room. He would grab a blanket from the nurses and then fall asleep in a chair by Jude's bed.

Tabloid titles were mostly about Jude. "Instant Star Mentally Unstable?", "Jude Harrison Clings to Life after Suicide Attempt.", and "The Life of A Rock Star Not So Glamorous," were a few of the more common ones.

EJ had tried her best to keep Jude out of the news but it was no use. Every day there would be a new story with new lies. There was nothing EJ could do about it.

Jude was in stable condition but still hadn't woken up. Tommy was tense with worry and emotions ran high in the room. Mr. Harrison had refused to come see Jude and it was like Mrs. Harrison had dropped off the face of the planet. She wasn't answering her cell or her home phone.

"Do you think she'll ever wake up?" Sadie asked one night, exactly a week after Jude was hospitalized.

"I don't know Saide. I hope so," he said as he gently squeezed Jude's hand.

Sadie and Shay were across the street at the hotel as usual that night and Tommy had been holding her hand when he had fallen asleep. A raspy voice quickly woke him up.

"Tommy."

"Jude, you, you're awake."

"Your back," she said.

"I've been back for two weeks. You were just too busy playing Sleeping Beauty to notice," he said with a smile.

"Sorry," she said.

"Dont be. Jude, this was my fault. I should have never left."

"You're right, you shouldn't have. Are you the only one that's been here?

"No, Shay and Sadie have been here too, but they're both sleeping at the hotel right now.

"Shay's been here?"

"Yeah, we all sit around the hospital all day."

"What about my parents?" Jude asked.

Tommy was dreading this question but he knew he had to tell her the truth. "Your Dad, he uh, when he found out what you had done, he refused to come. We can't find your Mom."

"What? You can't find her?"

"Jude just calm down, I'm sure it's nothing."

"Fine," Jude said as she leaned back in bed.

"You're awake," Sadie said excitedly, breaking the tension as she hugged Hude.

"Sades, I can't breathe."

"Oh sorry. But, I mean we weren't sure if you were going to wake up."

Tommy slipped out of the room so the two sisters could talk in private. He walked towards the nurses station and saw Jude's regular nurse come towards him.


	8. Chapter 8

"Hello Mr. Quincy."

"Tommy."

"Okay, Tommy, now that Jude is awake we need to get her treatement. Since her parents are pretty much out of the picture, we can't do anything."

"Why not?"

"She's a minor, and since your her supposed fiance we're obligated to realease her into your care. Unless she wants to go into rehab we can't force her. My suggestion is to take her somewhere secluded and watch her every move 24/7."

Tommy sighed and thought about it for awhile. "I have the perfect place."

Tommy talked to Shay and Sadie about the best plan of action for Jude. Right away Sadie and Shay were not convinced about Tommy's plan to take her to his family's cabin, but they eventually warmed up to the idea. Jude on the other hand, did not.

"I want to finish the tour," Jude screamed when she heard Tommy's plan.

"Jude there's no way you can do that," Sadie tried to reason.

"There is nothing wrong with me!" Jude retorted.

"People just don't try and kill themselves out of the blue Shorty," Shay said.

"Shut up," she yelled back.

"There has to be some reason Jude," Tommy said.

"Right away it was because you weren't with me and you hadn't talked to me or anything and now...I don't know why I do it," Jude said as she felt Tommy's strong arms wrap around her.

"You can't keep doing this Jude. I won't let you. I hate that I was the cause of this so now I'm going to fix it."

Jude moved closer to Tommy and laid her head on his chest. She wasn't sure what to say so she just sat there, his warm arms wrapped around her frail body. She could feel his heart racing and in a split second she knew he cared.

Tommy held her for a few moments and then stood up and held his hand out for her. "Come here, I have a surprise for you." He was going to wait until tomorrow to show it to her, but now seemed as good a time as any.

Jude took his hand and followed him into a room wich resembled Studio B at G Major.

"Wow," she said softly as she walked towards the recording table.

"I had this room redone for you so we could work on some songs while we're here. But, you have to promise me that those destructive thoughts inside that pretty little head of yours go on paper and get recorded instead of going into a razor blade and onto your body."

"Tommy, I,"

"Tell me," he ordered in a gentle, yet firm voice. "If I find out your cutting again I will put you in rehab Jude. I'll have no other choice. I don't want to lose you."

Jude stayed silent for a bit. She sat down in front of the recording table and played with a few buttons. She didn't know if she had heard Tommy right. Did he just say he didn't want to lose her? "You care more about me than my own family," she blurted out absentmindedly.

"Jude don't say that. I'm sure your parents care...you know Sadie cares."

"Yeah I know Sadie does. But what about my parents, the ones that should be here for me now? Where are they?"

"I don't know Jude, I can't answer that. But you still need to answer my question, will you stop cutting?"

"Fine, I promise. But...I need help Tommy. I can't do this by myself. I'm not even sure if I can kick the pills and the cutting altogether."

"I'm here and I'm not going anywhere," Tommy reassured her as he gave her a hug. "I know you can do this Jude."

"I'm glad you think I can, because sometimes I don't think I can do anything."

"I really wish Kwest would have told me what had been happening to you on tour."

"You never called how was he supposed to?" Jude asked looking skeptically at Tommy.

"I did keep in touch with Kwest. I called every day to see how you were," Tommy said tersley.

"What? And Kwest never told me?"

"I told him not to. Jude the whole point of me leaving was so you could meet someone your own age."

"I never wanted to Tommy."

"I know...and I really wish I had seen that before I left. I could have prevented pain all around."

"It's over and done with. We can't do anything about it now."

Tommy was expecting Jude to blow up and yell at him when he told her about his secret calls to Kwest, but he was surprised at how calm and forgiving she was being. "How about we go watch a movie? I'll even let you pick."

"Romeo and Juliet...with Leonardo DiCaprio?" she asked.

"Unfortunately I don't have that one," Tommy said, mocking sadness at the fact that he didn't have the movie.

"You don't, but I just so happened to have brought it with me," Jude said as she ran off to her room.

Tommy laughed as she bounded out of the room. This was the Jude he missed. This was the happy Jude, the Jude he had fallen in love with.

They sat on the couch together, Jude snuggled into the crook of his arm. She fit so perfectly there. She had been through so much, yet she was still 16 and Tommy's consience would not let him forget it.

Jude had stayed awake until Leonardo DiCaprio, as Romeo, had found out Claire Danes, as Juliet, had died. She looked so beautiful with her fire red hair. He thought about moving her to her bedroom but decided against it. He would probably wake her up and this way he could keep an eye on her. He didn't add to himself that he liked the feel of her in his arms.

The next morning Tommy woke up with Jude still nestled in his arms. She was sleeping so peacefully he couldn't bear to disturb her, so he gently lifted her up and layed her back down.

He walked towards his room and slipped on a pair of worn jeans and a simple gray t-shirt. He had a feeling this was going to be a trying day for the both of them.

"Tommy," Jude said as she wokeup.

"I'm in my room," he called.

Jude stood up from the couch and walked towards Tommy's room.

"Hey sleepyhead," he said affectionately.

"Hey," she said as she shyly brushed the hair out of her face and behind her ear.

"Sleep good?" he asked as he threw his clothes from the night before into the wash.

"Alright I guess," she said quietly.

Somehow Tommy knew Jude was never going to talk about last night. Who knows, maybe it would be better this way but, his spunky, full of life Jude was replaced by the shy little girl as a result of it. She seemed so small and defenseless as she stood in the doorway twirling her hair around her finger.

"Tommy?" she asked bringing him out of his thoughts.

"What? Oh yeah, sorry I was a bit out of it," he said as he grabbed his watch off the dresser for the pure point of busying his hands. "Do you want some breakfast? I could whip up an omelet or something."

"Cereal would be fine," she said flashing her trademark smile.

"Alright," Tommy said as he followed her into the kitchen.

The two sat at the table in silence. Tommy absentmindedly muched on his toast and Jude took a few bites of her cereal before it became soggy.

"Anything special you want to do today?" Tommy asked breaking the silence.

"To be honest, I don't really care."

"Do you like swimming?"

"Huh?"

"There's a lake about a quarter mile from here. I figured we could spend the day there and maybe tomorrow we could work on some writing or record a little."

"That doesn't sound like a bad idea Quincy."

"See, I'm not as useless as eveyrone thinks I am."

"your not useless all the time," she joked.

"Very funny. Why don't you go get ready and I'll pack some food. We can get out of here in about a half hour."

"Okay," Jude said as she walked into her room. She only owned one swimsuit and that was because Sadie had bought it for her. It had brown tie bottoms with pink flowers and the top was a halter in solid brown with one small lone pink flower on the right side. Not exactly Jude's style but she didn't have anything else. She quickly slipped on the ikini and threw a pair of jeans and a sweater over it. She threw her hair up in a ponytail, something she rarely did, and grabbed a towel.


	9. Chapter 9

"That was fast," Tommy said as he saw her walk out of her room. He had black swim trunks on with a white beater. Jude felt seriously overdressed.

"Yeah I guess," she simmply said.

"Well let's get going. Feel like walking?"

"Sure," she said as she followed him out of the door.

It took them about ten minutes to reach the lake.

"It's beautiful," Jude said in awe.

"Yeah. I used to come up here all the time. It was my secret place. Nobody knew about it until now," he said as he took his white beater off.

Jude watched as he took his shirt off which revealed tight tanned skin, toned abs, and the sensual curves of his back muscles. Her thoughts were interrupted when he dove in and splashed her.

"Are you coming Harrison or are you just going to stand there?"

"I'm coming. You just have no patience."

She slowly slipped off her jeans and the sweatshirt. Tommy watched intently. "Wow." He had never seen her look like this. She had a bronzy skin tone, but she wasn't exactly tan. Long, slightly muscled legs were the first things he saw. She had slight curves in all the right spots. She looked gorgeous with her hair up in a simple ponytail and the bikini left nothing to the imagination.

"I know, it looks stupid. Sadie bought it for me.

"Not quite what I was going to say," he said as he cleared his throat. "It, it looks great."

"I look like a freak."

"You look perfect. Now get your little butt in here."

Jude slowly eased herself into the lake. It was a bit deeper than she had anticiapated but the water was bright blue and cooled her down.

"I really missed this place," Tommy said as he splashed Jude.

"Hey," she said as she saw towards him and jumped on his back.

"I don't think so girl," he said with a laugh as he grabbed her and brought her around to face him.

Her eyes were too intense, her stare bore right through him. The tension felt like electricity flowing between them. He couldn't take it anymore. He kissed her with such intensity, such passion.

Jude felt Tommy's gentle, experienced, lips on hers. Her first instinct was to pull away but she couldn't. She put all of herself into that kiss. All the pent up emotions, all her passion, and all the energy she could muster.

Tommy took a quick breath and went back to kissing Jude. His hand gently touched her cheek and supported her head. Finally he broke away.

"Quincy, if you tell me to forget that I will slap you," she said out of breath.

"Jude I love you."

"What?"

Tommy laughed as he looked into her eyes. "I love you Jude. I have since the moment I met you."

"Are you drunk or high or something. Did you get into my pills or what? Because if you're joking I will kill you Quincy."

"I'm not joking or lying. I want you Jude. I missed you so much when I was gone."

Jude started crying. She'd wanted to hear those words the entire time she was on tour.

"Hey, what's wrong?" Tommy asked as he gently wiped away her tears.

"I missed you too," she managed to say.

"Hey, hey don't cry Jude. I was so stupid and I'm so sorry," he said as he reached for her hand and looked down at the scars on her arm. He delicately rolled his fingers over each one. "This is my fault Jude and I'm sorry," he said as he layed his forehead against hers.

"I love you," Jude said with a smile on her face.

"I know," Tommy said.

They spent the rest of the afternoon sitting around the lake, swimming, and just talking. Jude had wanted to be with Tommy for as long as she could remember. This day seemed like a dream. She was in a state of wonderment and shock. She wanted to be happy but she wasn't. Something was still wrong and it made her feel hollow and unstable.

Tommy and Jude made their way back to the cabin towards sunset. Tommy had a protective grip on her hand the entire way.

"So," Tommy said said as they walked into the cabin.

"I should probably go take a shower," Jude said quietly.

Tommy reached for her hand but she pulled away and walked into her bedroom. She paced the floor for awhile before the grabbed the bottle of sleeping pills setting on her dresser.


	10. Chapter 10

"Jude," Tommy's voice called as he opened her door and saw what she was holding.

"Jude give those to me," he said firmly.

"No," she said as her grip on the bottle tightened.

"Jude you can't do this to yourself. Not now," Tommy said as he slowly walked towards her.

"Why not Tommy? None of this will ever get better," she cried. "I'll always feel like this."

"Feel like what?" Tommy pleaded as he sat down beside her.

"Like this. I feel nothing Tommy. When you touch me I should feel fireworks and tension, but I feel nothing. I feel empty, hollow. I should be happy."

Tommy's hand clenched and pain shot through his heart. His Jude wasn't happy. He didn't know how to help. He grabbed the bottle and put his strong arms around her.

"Why am I like this? What's wrong with me?" Jude cried as tears spilled from her eyes.

"I don't know Jude but you will get better," Tommy reassured her as he stroked her hair.

"I've got everything I ever wanted and I'm not happy. I want to be though Tommy, so bad."

"Shh. Jude everything will get better. I promise," he said as he held her tighter. She felt so good in his arms.

"Don't let go," she said teresly.

"Never."

The next few days were a blur for both Tommy and Jude. One minute she would be fine and the next he'd catch her with a razor blade or pills in her hand. Tommy promised himself that no matter how much Jude yelled, screamed, and told him she hated him when he'd take the pills and razors away, he would not stand by and watch her self destruct.

"Tommy," he said answering his cell phone one day.

"Hey. How's things going?" Kwest asked.

"They're pretty rough to be honest," he said as he watched a sleeping Jude laying on the couch.

"What's goin' on?"

"She keeps trying to cut and take more pills," Tommy said with an exasperated sigh.

"Maybe, maybe you should bring her back and," Tommy cut him off.

"I will not put her in some psych ward! She's not crazy!" Tommy yelled.

"Okay, okay. You know we all care about Jude and we're all worried about her. We just want what's best for her."

"She'll get better Kwest. I know it," his voice said gently.

"Okay, how about you?"

"What about me?"

"How are you with all this?" Kwest asked.

"It's hard," he said as he sat down at the table and ran his fingers through his hair. "One minute she'll be fine and we'll be talking and the next she gets quiet and says she has to go get something. Then I usually find her with the pills and razors that I had gotten rid of earlier that day. She screams at me and tells me she hates me when I take them away. I know she doesn't mean it but it's not fun to hear."

"Wow," Kwest said quietly.

"How's the damage control coming?" Tommy asked quickly to change the subject.

"Not as good as EJ had hoped. People know you two are in some secluded place...alone and together. The press is running wild with it."

"Shit! What are they saying?"

"Oh no way am I telling you. You'll just get pissed."

"Kwest just tell me!"

"No. But, Georgia had a press conference yesterday because of it."

"Great," Tommy said quietly. "Have you heard from Jude's parents?"

"Yeah unfortunately. Her Dad is pissed at you but still refuses to talk to Jude and her Mom, her Mom is gallavanting around with her new 20-something boyfriend and doesn't really care what happens to Jude at this point."

"That's really going to help Jude," Tommy said sarcastically.

""If she's having a rough time, don't tell her," Kwest said. "It'll just make things worse."

"I know," he said as he stood up and paced the floor.

"What's going on," she asked meekly as she walked into the kitchen.

"Jude. Oh nothing, just talking to Kwest."

"Oh, I'll go into my room then."

"Tommy don't let her," Kwest said.

"Here Jude why don't you talk to Kwest for awhile," he said as he handed the phone to her.

"Jude looked at Tommy with a confused look on her face as she grabbed the phone. "Hello."

"Hey Jude."

"You did not just say that," Jude said.

"Oh sorry. Hi Jude."

"Much better."

Tommy walked into her bedroom and searched for pills and razors. It had been his ritual every day after the day at the lake. They'd been at the cabin for over a week and Tommy wasn't sure if Jude was getting any btter. He heard her laugh in the kitchen and it brough a smile to his face.

"I can't believe you and Sadie are dating Kwest! That's awesome. Tell her I miss her okay? Bye Kwest."

"Tommy," Jude called.

"What's up girl?" Tommy asked as he walked into the kitchen.

"Guess what?" she said with a huge smile on her face.

"Kwest and Sadie are dating?" he said with a mischevious grin.

"Quincy you're no fun," she said as she smiled.

"Well I couldn't help over hearing. Besides it's about time Kwest got himself a girlfriend."

"Yeah," Jude said with an expresionless look on her face.

"Hey I don't like that look," Tommy said as he pulled a chair up and sat backwards on it.

"What look?"

"That look that tells me your going to lose it any minute."

"Don't worry so much Tommy."

"How can I not?"


	11. Chapter 11

The day at the lake had never been mentioned. It was as if it had never happened and that was one of the hardest things for Jude. He acted like he cared, but it was as if he was scared to let his real feelings show.

"Do you love me?"

"Jude, you know I do. We've been through this before."

"I know. But if you love me why don't you ever look at me or kiss me like you did at the lake?"

"Because I want you to get better before we complicate things with a relationship. That's all."

"Oh," Jude said as she stared out the window.

"Hey, it's not that I don't want a relationship with you. I do, so bad that it hurts. It's just that I don't want to end up hurting you," Tommy said as he stood

behind her and wrapped his arms around her thin, frail body.

"I want to get better Tommy. I really do," Jude said as she leaned back against his arms.

"I know you do Jude and you will," Tommy reassured her. "It'll just take time."

"I know."

"I have an idea."

"That's a first," Jude joked.

"Hey. I'm serious. Why don't we drive into town and go out for dinner?"

"I don't know Tommy. What about all the people?"

"Jude, Greenville wouldn't care if you're the Queen of England. The most recent tabloid down there, if you could even find one, would probably be over a year old."

"Okay, I'll go. Maybe it'll be good to get out of here for awhile. What do I need to wear?"

"Doesn't matter really. Dressy or casual works," he told her.

"Well what are you wearing?"

"Jeans probably."

"Okay, give me twenty minutes."

"You got it girl."

Jude walked into her room and slipped on a dark blue spaghetti strap sundress. Another gift from Sadie. She sat down at her dresser and pulled half of her hair into

a ponytail and left the rest falling down her shoulders. She quickly swiped some pale shimmery eyeshadow across her eyelids.

Tommy gently knocked on the open door. "Jude are you almost," he caught a glance of her in the mirror as she was carefully applying clear lipgloss. "Wow, Jude

you look gorgeous."

"Jude smiled a bit before looking into the mirror. She wasn't sure what Tommy saw but she saw a gaunt pale face that wasn't her own. The curves that had once

been the focal point of her body were no more. "Thanks, but I think I look horrible. I'm too skinny."

"That's the first time I've ever heard that from a girl."

"Well it's true."

"Jude you're beautiful. Sure you've lost a lot of weight but you'll be back to normal in no time."

Normal...the word floated around Jude's mind. She was going to get back to her normal self no matter how hard it would be.

"I'm ready to go if you are."

"Yeah, let's go," Tommy said holding his arm out for her.

They walked arm in arm to the notoroious blue Viper. Jude smiled at the mere sight of it.

"What's so funny Harrison," he asked as he started the car.

"Just how in love you are with this stupid car."

"First it's not stupid. And maybe I am but if you had a sweet ride like this you would be too."

Jude laughed as she buckled her seat belt. "I can think of much better things to be in love with. So when are you going to let me drive it?" she asked, already

knowing the anser.

"Uhh let me think...never. I don't know if you remember but the last time I let you drive we almost died."

"We did not almost die," Jude retorted.

"Sure, whatever you say Harrison," Tommy said.

"They arrived at a quaint little Italian cafe in about ten minutes. It had a homey feeling which made Jude miss her family even more.

They were led to a small candlelit table behind a red checkered curtain. A dozen white roses were laid delicately on the table.

Tommy gently kissed her on the cheek before they sat down.

"What is all this Tommy?"

"It's for you," he said taking a sip of his water.

Jude eyed him curiously as she smelled the fragrant flowers. "I thought you didn't want to jump into this relationship."

"This isn't jumping, it's," Tommy paused for a moment. "It's more like skipping into it."


	12. Chapter 12

"That was original Quincy," Jude said as she grabbed a piece of garlic bread from the basket in the middle of the table.

"So it was a spur of the moment thing. I thought it sounded pretty good."

"I know what you meant by it."

The waiter came to take their orders seconds later. Jude ordered a simple lasagna and Tommy ordered stuffed portabella mushrooms.

"It's amazing how quiet it is here. If we'd be back in Montreal or Vancouver we'd be mauled by paparazzi and fans."

"I told you Greenville wasn't much for celebs. I'm sure they know who you are but they respect that your a person just like them."

"I don't think I ever want to go back home," Jude joked.

"I was thinking maybe Kwest, Sadie, and Shay could come up for a visit sometime next week."

"That would be fun. We could all go swimming and maybe we can record a few tracks before they come so Kwest can help with the beats," Jude said excitedly.

"My thoughts exactly girl," he said as their food was placed in front of them.

"This is so good," Jude said as she took a large bite of her lasagna.

Tommy smiled as he watched Jude. He hadn't really seen her eat since they had arrived at the cabin. It was so nice to see her so calm.

"My family used to come here all the time before," Tommy blurted out.

"Before what," Jude said as she gently set her fork down. She didn't know much about Tommy's family except that he was estranged from his brother and father.

"I don't want to talk about it, not here," Tommy said clenching his fists.

"Okay, we'll talk when we get home."

Jude had a feeling that it was her turn to be there for Tommy.

They ate the rest of their meal in silence. Tommy ached inside. He knew Jude would want the full, wretched story about what had happened six years ago. He wasn't sure how he was going to talk about it.

Tommy paid the cashier when they were done with their meal. He left a tip for the waiter before he grabbed Jude's hand and led her out of the restaurant.

"So now where to?" he asked her.

"Um, I'm not sure. What can you do here?"

"We could go down by the river shore."

"That sounds nice," Jude said.

They walked down to the shore hand in hand. Jude quickly kicked off her sandles and started running around in the soft sand. Tommy smiled at her. She looked so happy, so content, so like the Jude of old.

Tommy ran after her and grabbed her from behind. His warm arms wrapping around her tiny waist.

"Hey," she simply said as she threw her head back to face him.

"Hey what?" Tommy asked with a deep laugh.

"You caught me."

Tommy looked at her with a bit of conufsion in his eyes. "I what?

"Never mind," Jude said as she turned around.

Tommy looked down at her and brushed away a few strands of hair from her face, then reached for her hands. "I love you Jude Harrison, and nothing will change that. Not age, not anything." He bent down and gently kissed her soft red lips.

Jude felt Tommy's gentle loving lips upon her own. The kiss seemed to last for hours when it really only lasted a few moments.

After they broke the kiss Tommy put his forehead against Jude's.

"Tommy," Jude whispered.

He looked up to face her. "Yeah?"  
"I love you."

Tommy wrapped his arm protectively around her shoulder. "Let's go home."

They slowly made their way back to the Viper with Tommy's arm never leaving her shoulder. So many emotions ran through the both of them. Jude was...she was happy. She told Tommy she loved him and he never said anything that would mean she had to take it back. It was the second kiss they had shared since she had been released from the hospital and she didn't know what either of them really meant but she did know she loved him with all her heart.

They drove back to the cabin, only saying a few words to each other. Tommy wanted, he needed to tell Jude why he had left and what happened six years ago. He just wasn't sure if Jude was ready to hear it and if he was ready to talk about it.


	13. Chapter 13

"I'm going to go change," Jude said as she kissed him on the cheek and walked back towards her room. She went straight to her dresser and opened the bottom right drawer. Bottles upon bottles of pilles were stashed underneath her notebooks she used for writing lyrics. She carefully emptied them all into a box and walked into the bathroom. She poured the contents of the box into the toilet and flushed them down.

"I'm really proud of you Jude," Tommy said.

Jude jumped at the sound of his voice and turned around to see him leaning against the doorway. "Tommy you scared the crap out of me!"

"I'm sorry but you were gone awhile and I was worried."

"It's okay," Jude smiled.

"What made you throw them away?"

"You," Jude said quietly. "I don't need them anymore. I'm happy."

Tommy walked over and gently drew her into his arms. It felt so good to know that she was happy now. His Jude was slowly reappearing.

Jude smiled as Tommy wrapped his arms around her. "I'm done with the pills, and the cutting, and everything else I was doing. I'm done with it all."

Tommy tightened his grip on her. "I can't tell you how happy I am to hear that Jude." He gently picked her up off the ground and spun her around.

"Hey!" Jude laughed and playfully hit him.

Tommy put her back on the ground and smiled at her. "Didn't know the girl is scared of heights."

"Sure," Jude laughed. "Listen I am going to go change clothes now," her voice softened for a moment, "then we need to talk."

Tommy silently nodded and walked to his room to change also.

Jude slipped on a pair of gray sweatpants and a baggy white t-shirt she had stole from Tommy's laundry earlier in the week. She then walked out to the living room where she saw Tommy anxiously sitting on the couch, playing with a rubix cube.

"Hey," she said quietly as she sat down beside him.

Tommy put his arm around her shoulder and pulled her close to him. "Look Jude, I don't know about...I mean I don't think. I don't want to talk about this."

"Tommy," Jude pleaded.

"I don't think I can."

"I didn't think I could kick the pills either and look what I just did."

"Okay I get the point Jude," he sighed and looked up at the ceiling. "It happened six years ago..."


	14. Chapter 14

"We used to be a really happy, normal family. It was me, Mom, Dad, my older brother, and my younger sister. We lived in New York most of the time and whenever Mom wanted to work on her music we would come up to the cabin. Usually it was just me, my mom, and my sister. My brother was usually busy with one sport or another. My Dad usually had to work. Chelsea and I took after my Mom and we both loved music. Mom had a recording studio down the hill. We'd spend the day down there and then come back to the cabin at night. She'd do her own thing at the studio for awhile and then she'd let Chelsea and I do ours. By the time I was 14 I was getting noticed and then I joined BoyzAttack. I was the pure definition of the wild child and I thought I was the best. That's when my parents started fighting." Tommy paused for a moment and looked at Jude.

Jude put her hand over his and nodded for him to keep going.

"My Dad hated my music and wanted me to quit the band. My Mom would stick up for me and they'd get into the fight of the century. Then I went on a three month tour the summer I was 16. I got sick towards the end of the first month and I ended up dropping out of the tour and coming back to the cabin. My Mom and Chelsea came up, Dad and Ryan were supposed to but Ryan so conveniantly had a basketball tournament and Dad had a business convention. I felt like the family outcast but my Mom assured me that Dad and Ryan were just busy and that they did want to come and see me. I had a hard time believing that. After two weeks at the cabin I was starting to feel better and I made my way down to the studio to mess around with some beats. I was boiling some water on the stove in the mini kitchen and I forgot about it. After an hour I went up to the cabin and Mom and Chelsea went down to record a demo for Chelsea's solo record. A towel caught fire from the stove, and it..it burned down the studio," Tommy's eyes glistened with tears and Jude laid her head on his shoulder and gently squeezed his hand.

"They got caught in the studio. When they found my Mom she was already gone. The took Chelsea to the hospital but she died even before my Dad and Ryan knew about the fire. Dad and Ryan blamed me for everything. Darius recommended I take a break from BoyzAttack so I went back home for awhile. That lasted about a week and a half. Dad started yelling at me and hitting me. Ryan wouldn't even look at me let alone talk to me. I went back to the band even though I hated performing with the guys. I stayed until I was 19 and then I walked. I would have left sooner but I knew what I was going to end up going home to. I married Portia shortly after I left the band."

"Tommy, I'm so sorry. I had no idea."

"There's no way you could have known Jude. Not that many people know the whole story. I usually keep it to myself."

"I'm really glad you told me Tommy. I know it was hard for you."

"It was, but I'm glad you know."

"So why else did you leave?" Jude asked quietlly, not sure if she would recieve an answer or not.

"My brother decided to come to Vancouver. I was thinking of leaving anyway but when I found out Ryan was coming, I came up here."

"Oh," Jude said quietly. "Jude I know this is hard for you to understand but welcome to my life."

Jude sat there silently, snuggled against Tommy's broad chest. "I can understand it. I mean as well as a person who hasn't experienced any of that can."

"I'm going to go call Kwest and tell him to bring everyone up," Tommy said as he stood up and walked towards the kitchen.

Jude sighed and stretched out on the couch. She'd known Tommy had a dark past but she never imagined anything like this. She knew he still blamed himself for the fire and she needed to find a way to help him.

They both slept in their respective rooms with Jude being the first one to wake up. She tiptoed into the kitchen and started a pot of hazelnut coffee, Tommy's favorite. After the drink was brewed she carefully poured it into a G Major coffee cup and quietly walked to Tommy's room.

"Tommy, wake up," she said quietly as she walked over to the bed and pulled back the sheets. Tommy wasn't in bed. "Tommy," she called frantically. Normally Jude wouldn't worry if this had happened on regular day, but after last night she wasn't sure what to think. She hurried back to her room and quickly dressed in a pair of Tommy's sweats and a white tanktop with a black track jacket. She then started walking up the mountain toward the lake. When she got there she saw beer bottles littered everywhere.


	15. Chapter 15

"Tommy?" she asked questionably. She recieved no answer so she walked over to the patch of grass he was sitting on and sat down beside him. His eyes were bloodshot and glassy. He hadn't slept and Jude knew he'd been crying.

"Tommy," she said again, putting her hand on his shoulder. "What are you doing?"

"Drinking," he said not daring to look at Jude.

"Let's go back to the cabin," Jude gently prodded.

"I killed them Jude. I killed both of them."

Jude opened her mouth to say something but she decided against it and let him go on.

"I miss them Jude. You're just like her. A great songwriter, awesome voice, and you both cared about me. No one else ever has."

"Tommy that's not true. Portia, Kwest, EJ, Georgia, even Sadie..they all care about you."

"Not like you do Jude," Tommy slurred.

Jude stood up and reached her hand out to him. "We need to go back before you pass out. Sadie, Kwest, Shay, Portia, Kat, and Jamie are coming up this afternoon."

Tommy shakily stood up and grabbed Jude's hand.

Once they got back to the cabin, he fell asleep while Jude got ready and started cleaning before everyone came. Tommy was still sleeping soundly when the doorbell rang around two that afternoon. "Kwest!" she said as she all but jumped on him when she answered the door.

"Wow you look great Jude," Kwest said as he pulled away and looked at her. She was wearing a pair of dark denim jeans and a black Ramones t-shirt. It was noticeable that she gained some of the weight back that she had lost on tour but the thing that stood out the most was her bright smile.

"Thanks Kwest. I feel much better. Where's Sadie?"

"She had to work so she's driving up with Portia later tnoight." Kwest looked around the cabin a bit. "Where's Tommy?"

"He's uh sleeping," Jude said as she poured two glasses of iced tea for them.

"At two in the afternoon?"

"He...we had a rough night," Jude said in a deflated voice.

Kwest smirked and glanced at her mischeviously.

"Kwest, whatever you're thinking, it's not even close. He told me what happened down at the studio with his Mom and Chelsea."

"He told you?" Kwest asked wide eyed.

"Yeah."

"Wow he must really care about you."

Jude looked at him intently for a bit. "Anyway, after he told me what had happened we both went to bed. Or at least I thought he did. I woke up this morning to find he was gone. I walked up to the lake and I found him sitting on the ground. He was drunk."

"Tommy hasn't drank in years."

"I don't know how to help him Kwest."

"I thought he was supposed to be helping you."

"He did," she said as a big smile emerged on her face.

"Jude what happened up here?"

Jude smiled and blushed for a bit. "He kissed me Kwest. He told me he loved me," she said beming.

Kwest stood up and hugged Jude."I'm not so sure all that is such a good idea, but I've never seen you so happy." Jude smiled and walked towards the fridge.

"Don't tell Tommy I told you."

"Cross my heart." "Thanks Kwest."


	16. Chapter 16

"Hey man," a disheveled Tommy said.

"Hey."

"Where's everyone else?" he asked as he came behind Jude and put his arms around her waist.

Kwest gave Tommy an odd look before he answered. "Sadie and Portia are coming up tonight and everyone else is coming tomorrow morning."

"Nice. Um, Jude can I talk to you for a second?"

"Yeah, sure," Jude followed Tommy into the living room.

"Jude I'm sorry. About last night, this morning, everything. I'm supposed to be helping you, not the other way around."

Jude reached for his hand. "Don't worry about it. But, don't you think we should be careful with the PDA's?"

"Not around Kwest. I told him last night."

"Oh you did huh?"

"Yeah."

"What did you exactly tell him?"

"That I Have the best, beautiful, understanding girl in the world."

"So I'm your girl now?" she asked with a smile.

"Oh, you thought I was talking about you?" Tommy joked.

Jude playfully hit him in the shoulder. "Aren't we smart today."

Tommy placed a quick kiss upon her pouty lips. "We should get back."

"Yeah I suppose."

"So are you up for some work tonight Kwest?" Tommy asked as he and Jude walked into the kitchen.

"Sure. What do you guys have so far?"

"Well nothing recorded, but I have a bunch of lyrics." Jude told him.

"Okay. Let's get to work then."

Jude was setting her guitar amp up when Kwest and Tommy entered the studio.

"Are you ready Jude?" Kwest said.

"Yeah, let's do it."

Kwest hit the record button and sat back to listen to the croon of Jude's voice.

_You said you didn't need me, but you did. _

_You said you didn't want me, but you do. _

_It's kinda like a comedy. _

_First you kiss me and then say we're through. _

_I say you've got some issues, yeah ya do. _

_Some things you gotta work through, you really do. _

_It's sorta like a talk show. _

_No wait, a freak show when the freak is you. _

_I'm the smoke from your fire, I'm that guy you can trust. _

_I'm a chord on your guitar, I'm that girl you can't shut up. _

_I'm the blood you might need in your car when you speed. _

_I'm that cigarette you breath, you can't get rid of me. _

_You said I wasn't funny, then you laughed. _

_You said I couldn't drive last, then you crashed. _

_Funny how it works out with your big mouth. _

_You'll always get it back. _

_You thought you had me worked out, you're not deep. _

_Mr. I screw about, your still a creep. _

_At best you could've confessed that you're a big mess. _

_And that you're so damn weak. _

_I'm the smoke from your fire, I'm that guy you can trust. _

_I'm a chord on your guitar, I'm that girl you can't shut up. _

_I'm the blood you might need in your car when you speed. _

_I'm that cigarette you breate, you can't get rid of me. _

_And I still try and justify, try and let this die. You'll never say goodbye. _

_I can't quite rub it in your face. _

_Just in three more days I'll send you home to cry. _

_I'm the blood you might need in your car when you speed. _

_I'm that cigarette you breathe, _

_You can't get rid of me. _

"Wow, Jude that kicked!" Kwest said.

Jude smiled at Tommy and Kwest. "You liked it?"

"Liked it? That's your new number 1 girl," Tommy.

Jude laughed as she walked into the sound room. It was nice to see Tommy like this, especially when she herself was so happy.

After they talked for a few minutes Jude heard the dull chime of the doorbell. She walked to the door with Kwest and Tommy following close behind.


	17. Chapter 17

"Hey Sades," she said as she hugged her older sister.

"Hey, we missed you."

"I missed you guys too."

Sadie lowered her head down and whispered, "Stuck in a cabin all by yourself with Little Tommy Q? Oh yeah, I'm sure you missed us bunches. Just remember I need details!"

Jude blushed as her sister walked over to greet Kwest.

"Hi Jude," Portia said as she hugged the younger woman.

"Hey, thanks for coming up."

"Anytime. How are you doing?"

"Pretty good actually."

"Hey Portia," Tommy interrupted as he gave his ex-wife a quick hug.

"Hey Tom. It's been awhile."

"Yeah," Tommy said retreating to Jude's side.

"Why don't we go listen to Jude's new song," Kwest said, hoping to break the tension a bit.

"Yeah I'm up for it," Portia said.

Jude smiled and followed them into the studio.

"Aren't you coming?" Jude asked.

"Yeah. I'll be there in a few minutes."

"Okay."

Tommy waited for Jude to close the door to the studio before he walked towards the fridge, grabbed a bottle of Vodka, and took a few sips.

"Tommy."

Tommy whirled around to see who it was. "Portia," he said quietly.

"I thought you stopped drinking after the divorce."

"I did," he said as he carefully put the bottle back in the fridge.

"Don't do this to her Tommy," she said sternly. "She's been through enough the way it is."

"I have it under control."

"That's what you told me last time. You either need to stop, or talk to your Dad."

"How do you know?"

"The only time you ever drank was when something happened between you and your Dad," she paused for a moment. "You told her about your Mom and Chelsea didn't you?"

"Yeah, so?" Tommy asked.

"You still blame yourself don't you?"

"Of course I do Portia! That was my fault, and the things Jude did to herself, that was my fault too!" Tommy said, slamming his hands down on the cupboard.

"None of that was your fault Tommy! The fire was an accident. And Jude, who knows she probably would have done those destructive things with or without your influence."

"I tore my family apart and I almost killed Jude!"

"Your family was already torn apart Tommy."

"What's going on?" Jude asked quietly.

"Nothing," Tommy said, glaring at Portia as if warning her not to say anything.

"Um okay," Jude said, knowing that wasn't true. "Kwest needs your help with some beats Tommy," Jude said.

"Okay," Tommy said as he walked towards the studio, leaving the two women alone.

Jude walked toward the fridge to grab some drinks when she turned around to face Portia. "What was really going on?" she demanded.

"I don't think I should be the one to tell you Jude."

"Tell me now!" Jude said, starting to get angry.

Portia was surprised at the anger and the determination the young woman had. She both resented and respected it. "He was drinking."

"I knew it!" she said as she opened the fridge and grabbed the two bottles of vodka, some rum, and a six pack of beer."

"What are you doing?" Portia asked as Jude walked towards the sink.

"This," Jude said as she started to pour the contents down the drain.

Jude finished emptying the bottles and then followed Portia back into the studio.


	18. Chapter 18

"Hey," Tommy said, studying Jude's angry face.

"Hi," she said coldly as she sat down beside Kwest. "So what do we have so far?"

"Medium rock beat, some drums in the background with electric guitar, and of course your awesome voice."

"Great."

Tommy glared at Portia and pulled her into the corner. "What the hell did you tell her?"

"I didn't tell her anything Tom. She knew..."

"Sure she died," he said turning around.

"Are you guys hungry?" Jude asked.

"I'm starving," Portia and Kwest said in unison.

"I'll go pop some frozen pizza's in the oven," Jude said as she stood up.

"Whoa, when did you become Miss Suzy Homemaker?" Sadie asked as she wrapped her aroms around Kwest.

"Sadie, it's only frozen pizza," she said as she walked out into the kitchen. Little did she know, Tommy was following right behind her.

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing," she said as she violently ripped the plastic off the two pizzas.

"Sure Jude. So there's no reason why you're giving me the cold shoulder?"

"Go look in the fridge."

Tommy slowly walked toward the fridge and opened the door. "Where is it?" he demanded.

"Down the drain Tommy! Kwest told me you hadn't drank in a long time and I know what was going on when you and Portia were arguing!"

"So you threw it away? Yeah that's going to solve everything Jude!" he yelled.

"Don't yell at me Tom!" she yelled back.

Tommy knew she was mad when she called him Tom. "Why did you throw it away?"

"Because I don't want you to go through any of the things I did!"

Tommy stared at her for a few minutes with an unreadable expression on his face. "I'm sorry," his voice softened.

"Good," she said as she shoved the pizza's in the oven.

Tommy smiled and walked behind her, wrapping his arms around her tiny waist. "Has anyone told you that you're really cute when your mad?" he said gently nuzzling her neck.

"Did you know it's really hard to stay mad at you when you're doing that?"

"Yes."

Jude laughed and turned around. "No more drinking."

"Okay. No more cutting or pills."

"Hey I already got rid of that stuff."

"I know, just making sure."

"Hey, you guys I'm seriously starving," Kwest said as he walked into the kitchen, followed by Sadie and Portia.

Jude broke away from Tommy's embrace, grabbed some crackers from the cupboard, and set them on the counter. She saw Kwest's slightly dissapointed look. "Hey, it's all we have. We haven't exactly been to the store," Jude said smiling.

Kwest laughed and took a few crackers out of the box.

"So I thought we could all go swimming tomorrow after Kat, Jamie, and Shay get here," Jude said.

"Swimming!" Sadie exclaimed. "I brought another bikini along for you Jude."

"Oh joy," she said.

"Don't diss her bikini style. She looks pretty good in the ones she owns," Kwest said.

Sadie blushed walked over and hit him in the shoulder. "Shut up Kwest!"

"Ouch! Sorry."

Jude laughed and went over to sit on Tommy's lap.

Sadie looked at Jude and Tommy then at Kwest, her eyes growing to three times their normal size. "What's going on here?"

"Nothing," Tommy said, surpressing a smile.

Sadie looked at Kwests smug smile and Portia's thin one. "You...you...," she said looking back and forth from Tommy and Jude to Portia and Kwest. "You're dating aren't you?" she accused Tommy and Jude.

"Sort of I guess," Jude said, holding back a smile.

"And you all knew and didn't tell me?" Sadie pouted.

"Hey sweetie, no one was supposed to know," Kwest said grabbing her hand.

"Thanks guys," Sadie said, plopping down into a chair beside Kwest.

"Sorry Sades," Jude said.

Just then the buzzer on the oven went off. Jude cut the pizza and everyone dug in.

"You're a great cook girl," Tommy told her.

"Oh thanks. Ya know I put so much into," she giggled.

"So what's up for tonight?" Portia asked.

"We could watch some movies," Jude offered.

"Do not make me watch Romeo and Juliet again," Tommy voiced his opinion.

"Oh you know you loved it," Jude said, kissing him on the cheek.

"My man watched Romeo and Juliet?" Kwest asked.

"One chick flick! And she made me watch it," Tommy defended himself.

"Sure," Portia said.

"So what do you suggest we watch?" Jude asked Tommy.

"I don't know."

"Okay, girl meeting!" Sadie called.

The three women huddled together and discussed a few movie choices.

"Okay we've got it," Sadie said.

"What?" Kwest said, almost afraid to hear the answer.

"Titanic," Portia announced.

"Oh come on! Like that's much better," Tommy argued.

"Hey, it's not like you guys suggested anything," Sadie said.

"Well how about The Beach?" Kwest asked.

"No way!" Jude said.

Tommy laughed remembering Jude's fear of scary movies.

"What about Cruel Intentions?" Portia asked.

The groupd all nodded in unison before they started washing dishes and cleaningup.


	19. Chapter 19

After they were finished Portia made some popcorn while Jude got the movie ready.

"Come on you guys!" she called, announcing the movie was about to come on.

Ten minutes later Jude was curled up in Tommy's arms on the floor, Sadie was leaning against Kwest on the couch, and Portia was sitting on the leather loveseat. Jude snuggled closer to Tommy and he wrapped his arms tighter around her. A twinge of jealousy shot through Portia. What if's and what have been's ran through her head. What would have happened if Tommy hadn't started drinking? Would they still be married? Would they have kids? Would Jude have been an "Instant Star". She knew it wasn't Jude's fault for her failed marriage and she liked the younger woman, but it was still hard to see her with her ex-husband whom after four years, she still hadn't gotten over.

"Portia," Jude said quietly. "The movie is over."

"Oh, sorry," she said, throwing her hair over her shoulder.

"Don't worry about it. Everyone else went to bed so I'll see you in the morning?"

"Yeah, of course," Portia said.

"Night," she said as she walked back towards her room. She changed into a pair of black pajama pants and a red rocker tanktop. She was brushing her hair when she felt a hand on her shoulder.

"Hey Tommy."

"I'm surprised you knew who it was," Tommy said as he sat beside her on the bed.

"Who else would come into my bedroom in the middle of the night?" she asked with a smug smile.

"Good point," he said before he leaned in to kiss her.

"Mmm, I could get used to this."

"I already am. But we have to go back to Toronto sometime or another.

"I know, but do you blame me for not wanting to? Who knows what's going to happen with my parents. They don't care anyway," she said as she nonchalantly played with his hair.

"No I don't blame you. And I'm sure your parents do care about you," Tommy said, unsure if Jude's parents cared at all. He stretched out on her bed and grabbed a pillow.

"Hey I was planning on sleeping tonight."

"I was too, here with you." Tommy saw the instant shock and fear on Jude's face.

"Hey," he said reaching for her hand, "Sleeping and nothing more, k?"

Jude let out a small sigh of relief. "Okay," she said as she laid down beside Tommy and fell into a deep sleep.

"Are we almost there yet Andrews?" an impatient Kat said the next morning.

"Yes, just have some patience," Jamie said to his girlfriend of two months.

"We've been driving forever," Shay said from the backseat.

"We're almost there okay. Ten minutes...tops."

Portia, Sadie, and Kwest, all awoke at relatively the same time. Tommy and Jude were still sleeping peacefully, but the others did not know that Tommy was in Jude's room.

After playing rock paper scissor to see who was going to wake Tommy and Jude up, Sadie walked towards Jude's room first.

"Jude, time to get up," Sadie said as she hopened the door. The first thing she saw was a shirtless, boxer-clad Tommy, sleeping with her younger sister. "Holy shit!"

Jude's head popped up at the sound of Sadie's loud voice. She gently shook Tommy's shoulder to wake him up.

"Hey girl," he said, reaching up to kiss her.

Jude fiddled with her hair and pointed towards the door. "Um Tommy..."

"Yeah, uh Tommy what are you doing in bed with my sister?"

"I uh, I came to wake her up and I got tired. So, I rested," he said, already knowing it was a horrible lie.

"Sadie, nothing happened," Jude supplied.

"Nothing better happen...ever."

"We know Sadie," Jude said as she got out of bed and walked towards her closet.

Sadie retreated from the room, shaking her head, while Jude and Tommy succumbed to a fit of laughter.

"Like Sadie wasn't doing more than sleeping with guys when she was 16," Jude said as she dug through her drawer to find a pair of jeans.

"She's just worried about you Jude. Our relationship isn't exactly typical."

"What's that supposed to mean?" she asked heatedly.

"Nothing," Tommy said throwing his hands up in the air. "Just that how many 23 year olds date 16 year olds."

"So what Tommy? There was that Anna Nicole or whoever that married that 80 year old guy." Jude saw Tommy's look of questioning. "Okay so maybe not the best example, but seriously what is seven years."

"Seven years is a really big deal. Especially if I get caught and sent to jail."

"You won't get sent to jail Tommy! If you don't want this, fine!"

"I'm not saying I don't want this Jude. I'm just saying that people aren't going to think too highly of it."

"So what Tommy," she said as she dissapeared into the adjoining bathroom to change. "I don't really care and you shouldn't either!"

"I don't. But what about your parents, Georgia, and not to mention the press," Tommy said, pulling on his jeans. "It's one thing to date a minor, but when that minor is your client it's a little different."

"So your saying you want to end this?" she asked, coming out of the bathroom wearing jeans and a black cami.

"No! That's not what I meant! You keep twisting whatever I say!"

"So what are you saying Tommy?"

"I don't know Jude. Why do we have to complicate this now?"

Jude glared at him and stormed out of the room.

"Jeez I can't do anything right!" Tommy said to himself.


	20. Chapter 20

"What happened?" Portia asked when she walked through the door and heard the door to Jude's room slam.

"We had a fight," she said solemnly.

"About what?"

"Just, stuff I guess."

"Oh," Portia said calmly as the doorbell rang.

Jamie Andrews was greeted at the door by Jude. She looked so different, so not Jude. Her hair was pulled back into a high ponytail and she wore jeans and a black spaghetti strap shirt. Something Jamie had never seen her in.

"Hey you guys!" She exclaimed as she put a fake smile on her face and hugged Jamie, Kat, and Shay.

"Hey shorty," he said as he picked her up and kissed her on the cheek. He also recieved a cold, hard glare from Tommy.

Portia's eyes burned holes through Tommy as if warning him to not start anything. "Hey Kat," he said, pulling her into a quick hug.

"Um hi Tommy," she said awkwardly.

"Andrews," Tommy said, shaking his hand.

Jamie nodded his head, shook his hand, and went to stand by Kat.

"Quincy," Shay said, finally releasing Jude from his grip.

"Shay Shay," Tommy said, his voice dripping with disdain. Being nice to Shay while Jude was in the hospital was one thing, this on the other hand, was a totally different situation.

"Good to see you."

"Yeah, likewise," he said sarcastically.

Jude glared at both of them. She did not need the usual bickering that went on between the two, not today.

"Well I guess we could get ready to go up to the lake now," Sadie said, trying to break the ice.

"Yeah," Jude said. "Do you have that bikini for me?"

Shay's eyes instantly perked up when he heard the last part of Jude's dialogue.

"Yeah of course. Come on," Sadie said leading her sister into her room.

Tommy sighed and assigned rooms to everyone before he went back to his room to change.

"What are you trying to do to me Sadie?" Jude asked as she tugged on the bikini bottoms. "They're like super super low-rise."

Sadie laughed as she pulled on a jacket over her plain bubblegum pink bikini. "Well that's what the tag said. Look, do you want Tommy or not?"

"Well yes, but don't I kind of have him already?"

"Just wear it Jude. It looks good. I know Kwest would fall over if I could pull that bikini off, and you can so just work it."

"Fine," she said as she pulled on a pair of sweats and a baggy sweatshirt. "Work it...yeah like I know how to do that," she mumbled to herself as she walked out of the room.

A half hour later the groupd was finally ready to go and they made the short trek up the mountain and arrived at the lake.

Kwest was the first one to strip down and jump in the cool, blue lake, followed by Jamie, Shay, and finally Tommy. The girls on the other hand were taking their time.

"What are you doing?" Kwest asked Sadie.

"What does it look like? I'm going to set my blanket out and tan."

Kwest gave Jamie an odd look, shrugged, and they went back to goofing around.

Portia set her towel beside Sadie and spread some lotion over her body. Her white halter top bikini made her look even darker and more exotic. "No wonder Tommy had married her," Jude thought to herself. She was sitting by a tree, still dressed in her sweats and sweatshirt. After the fight she'd had with Tommy, she didn't really feel like having fun.

"Hey," a dripping wet Kwest said as he sat down by Jude.

"Hi."

"What's wrong?"

"Nothing," Jude said quietly as she watched Tommy swim around in the lake.

"Sure," Kwest said. "Your not the type of girl to sit around while everyone else is having fun. Your not like Sadie," he laughed. "Did you and Tommy fight?"

"Yeah, I guess you could say that."

"The best way to show Tommy that is doesn't bother you is to come and have some fun with us."

"I don't feel like having fun right now Kwest."

"They you might as well forget about Tommy," Kwest said bluntly. When he saw the hurt expression on her face, his tone softened. "Look I've never seen Tommy look at another girl like he looks at you. Even Portia has noticed it. But, if you decide to play the angsty teen girlfriend all the time, that'll be it."

"I know. But, it's just...hard."

"Yours and Tommy's relationship will be harder than most. There's no way around it. But if you decide to wait long enough over here and look so depressed, Shay is bound to make his way over here and put the moves on."

"He wouldn't do that."

"Oh really? You went out with the guy, but I don't think you really know who he is."

"He knows Tommy and I are together."

"Sure he knows, but does he care? Has another guy ever stopped him before?"

"No, but things between us...they're over, they've been over for a long time."

"I know, I'm just warning you."

"Fine, I'll come swimming," she said as she quickly shed her sweats and the baggy sweatshirt to reveal tiny black binkini bottoms with a small, hot pink, music note on the right hip. The top was a halter, also black, showed a good amount of cleavage, and had a pink music note on the left shoulder.

"Wow. Sadie really meant what she said when shd told me she bought you a hot bikini."

"Shut up Kwest," she said as she quickly folded her arms over her chest.

"Fine, fine. All I'm saying is Tommy should be checked for blindness and then shot if he doesn't notice you."

"Yeah sure. I'm all pale and I'm way too skinny."

"You look fine Jude, don't worry. Let's go have some fun," he said as he stood up and led her over to the side of the lake.

Tommy was swimming makeshift laps when he looked up and saw Jude stripping her clothes off. What she was wearing underneath those messy, baggy clothes was not normal Jude Harrison. This bikini was even more revealing than the last one he'd seen her in.


	21. Chapter 21

_Authors Note- Okay I know this chapter totally blows and is really boring, but I've had a lot going on, and this is all I could come up with. Sorry guys!_

Wow," Shay said to himself when he saw Jude walk towards the lake.

Jude followed Kwest to the edge of the lake before she slowed to a stop. She saw she had both Shay and Tommy's full attention. Not quite what she was going for but it worked. She walked closer to the water and stepped on a rock. A sharp, hot pain shot through her ankle as she plummeted into the water. Hot tears of embarrasment and pain fell down her cheeks.

Tommy saw what had happened and rushed over to her. "What's wrong?" he asked, his voice full of concern.

"I don't know," she said as she held back tears. Tommy had seen her cry before but for some reason she didn't want him to see her cry over this.

By the time Tommy had lifted her up onto the ledge of lake, the group had gathered around her.

Tommy gently lifted her leg out of the water and ran two fingers alongside of her ankle.

"Ow!" Jude yelled as she felt a sharp jab of pain.

"I think it's sprained," Tommy announced.

"We should get her back to the cabin," Kwest said. "It's already starting to swell."

"I'll take her back," Tommy said, pulling himself out of the lake.

Jude was in too much pain to concentrate on what was going on. She felt Tommy pick her up, and hold her in his arms. His gentle strong hands ran over her thigh and lower back. She thought about fighting him, fighting his touch, but she was too tired to care.

Tommy quickly lifted Jude and started to carry her down the mountain, leaving the rest of the group at the lake. He was surprised how light she felt in his arms.

"I can walk you know," Jude said as she remembered what was happening, and that her and Tommy had been fighting.

"Jude this is so not the time to be stubborn."

"I'm not being stubborn, I just want to walk by myself."

"Jude, we're almost there. Stop moving around before I drop you."

Jude glared back at Tommy but decided to keep her thoughts and opinions to herself.

When Tommy entered the cabin he gently set her down on the couch and went to get some ice and aspirin for her ankle.

"What are you doing?" Jude called from the living room.

"Here," he said handing her a glass of water and the aspirin.

"Thanks," she said as she looked away from his loving eyes.

Tommy tenderly lifted her legs, sat down on the couch, and laid them on his lap. He then held the ice on her swollen ankle.

A small smile came upon Jude's face and she forgot the anger and hostility that she held against him. "I'm sorry."

"For what?"

"This morning. I blew everything out of proportion and I had no right to."

"Jude, nobody ever said this was going to be easy," Tommy sighed.

"I know, I just, I wish it could be ya know? Everything else has to be complicated, like my relationship with my parents, the whole tour thing, and I thought maybe this could be easier."

"It'll be one of those things that will be hard but will work out in the end," Tommy said as he massaged her calf.

Jude sat there and watched Tommy. He amazed her. They'd both seen each other at their worst and maybe that was the thing that bonded them so much.

"We should probably change clothes before everyone else gets here," Tommy said.

"Yeah I suppose. Ya wanna help me get to my room?" Jude asked as she started to stand up.

"Sure," Tommy said as he quickly lifted her into his arms and started toward his room.

"Hey," Jude said giggling. "I meant you were suppoed to help me walk to my room."

"I know, but this was much more fun," he said as he lovingly kissed her on the forehead.


	22. Chapter 22

_Authors Note: I know this is pretty short, but it leaves a nice little cliffhanger at the end and sets up for a longer chapter for probably later on today, depending on how much time I get to write. Review if you please!_

Jude hobbled around her roomm and eventually managed to pull on some sweats and a plain t-shirt. "Tommy," Jude yelled.

"What's wrong?" Tommy rushed into the room.

"Nothing," Jude laughed. "I just need you to help me to the living room."

"Oh okay," he said as he wrapped his arm around her waist to support her.

"Oh so you're not going to carry me this time?" Jude asked with a sly grin.

"Nah, we gotta mix it up a big," he said as he helped her ease into the loveseat. He sat beside her and protectively wrapped his arm around her. "I could stay like this forever girl," he told her as he kissed her forehead.

"Me too, but you and I both know that we can't. We both have things we need to do."

"Like what?"

"You need to clear things up with your family," she said quietly.

Tommy let out a sigh of disgust as he stood up and started pacing around the room. "They're the ones that disowned me Jude," Tommy yelled as he lost his temper. "They're the ones that want nothing to do with me. They're the ones that screwed everything up."

"While that all maybe true, something about your family is tearing you up inside and if you don't attempt to fix it, it's going to kill you Tommy. Either you'll keep drinking or turn to other things and I don't want to see that happen to you."

"Maybe it doesn't matter anymore."

Jude's eyes looked downcast, but the fiery redhead was ready to put up a fight with her words. "Everything matters Tommy! Your music, your writing, your producing, everything matters! If you give up on everything now, after all you, and after all we've been through then I might as well drive down to the grocery store and pick up some new pills and a few razors because there is no point in my life without you!" she yelled as she hobbled over to the fireplace.

Tommy turned around and placed his hands on the sides of her face. "Don't you ever let me hear you say that again! Ever!"

"Don't give up and we won't have a problem Tommy! You know that all your problems stem from your family, just like most of mine do. Don't you think that I know what's going on with my parents? My Dad doesn't care because he's too busy with Yvette, and Mom has a new boyfriend whose young enough to be my brother!"

"H...how did you know?"

"I cornered Sadie last night while you were washing dishes. She told me everything. Oh and get his lovely new bombshell...my Mom is pregnant."

"Jude, I'm...I'm sorry. You shouldn't have found out now," he said, pulling her into an embrace.

"Why didn't you tell me Tommy? Why?" she asked, tears streaming down her face.

"You were doing so good Jude, I didn't want anything to trigger a setback."

"I'm not going to let them turn me back to what I did..."

"That's good Jude but I was scared and afraid that you would."

"You still could have told me!"

"Am I interrupting brother dearest?" a voice came from the door.

"Ryan," Tommy said through clenched teeth.


	23. Chapter 23

_Authors Note: Okay I know these last 2-3 chapters have been much shorter than my usual 1,000 word ones, but it's all working up to something big. I'm not sure you guys are going to like it but we'll see what happens. Review please!_

"Oh no formal greeting for your older brother?" he mocked with a cocky smirk.

Jude glared at Ryan. He was the exact opposite of Tommy. He had shaggy blonde hair, about 6"2', very muscular, and his attitude oozed cockiness. The only way you could tell they were brothers was by their tell all, steely blue eyes.

"What are you doing here?" Tommy asked accusingly.

"I started reading a few tabloids the other day. Something about little Tommy Q robbing the cradle," his eyes gazed Jude up and down as if he was undressing her. "Jeez Tommy, she's not bad but she's nothing to lose face over. But I did hear her sister's nice blonde piece of ass though, plus she's legal."

Tommy started to lunge at Ryan but Jude held him even though she had been offended by his words.

"Let me go!" Tommy ordered.

"No way! You'll probably kill him."

"And your point?"

"Aww isn't that cute. Your little whore is holding you back. You know you couldn't hurt me anyway."

"Shut up Ryan!"

"Oh I've struck a nerve!" Ryan said as he walked towards Jude and put a finger underneath her chin, forcing her to look at him. "You might be good in bed. Maybe that's what he's keeping you around."

The next thing Jude knew, Ryan flew to the floor and was out cold.

"Now do you know what I don't like my family?"

"Oh I have a good idea. But you're Dad can't be as bad as him."

"Oh no, he's five times worse."

"Great, um what are we going to do with him?"

"Leave him there till he wakes up."

"Oh okay."

"What the hell happened?" Kwest said as he walked into the cabin.

"Oh we just had a small disagree-" Tommy tried to finish but Ryan jumped at him and took him to the floor.

Ryan kept pummeling his younger brother until Kwest finally managed to pull him off.

"Chill out Ryan," he yelled.

"Oh it's Tommy's great defender," Ryan mocked as he raised his hand to his bleeding lip.

"Shut up Ryan before I hit you myself."

Jude slowly made her way to Tommy's side. His bottom lip was bleeding as was his nose and a small gash above his eye.

"I'm going to kill him," he said as he started to stand up.

"I don't think so," Jude said.

"Better listen to your whore Tommy!" Ryan spat.

Kwest tightened his grip on Ryan and whispered. "Aren't we an asshole today?"

"It's my job."

"Get out!" Tommy yelled.

"Gladly," Ryan replied as he walked out the door. He was going to put up a fight, but he had the perfect plan that would ruin his perfect brother.


	24. Chapter 24

_Authors Note: _Okay guys here it is..the thing I've been workin up to. I hope you like it, and if you think my rating should go up let me know. And sorry if a few parts are a bit detailed...I tried as best as I could to get everything across without totally going into detail. I hope you like it and please REVIEW! I should get some kinda praise...three chapters in one day! Heck yes :P

Jude, Tommy, Kwest, and Sadie said goodbye to Kat, Jamie, Portia, and Shay later that evening.

"Take care of yourself Shorty,"Shay said as he hugged her.

"I will. Keep in touch okay?" Jude said.

"You got it. I have a tour coming up in three weeks, I'll call you or email you at least once a week."

"Thanks Shay."

"Bye Jude," Jamie said as he hugged her tightly.

"I'll see you later okay? Maybe Tommy and I will come back to town next week."

"Okay, I'll see you Jude.

The four drove away after a few tearful goodbyes, which left the two sisters and the two best friends.

After they ate supper Jude announced that she was going to bed. She used the crutches Tommy had found in the basement to walk over to him and share a lighthearted kiss before she made it to her bedroom.

She changed into her pajamas and heard Sadie go to bed with Tommy and Kwest following after. THat was two to three hours ago and she had long since fallen into a deep sleep.

She felt a hand on her shoulder and murmured Tommy's name.

"Guess again bitch."

Jude's eyes flashed open with terror as a hand covered her mouth. She knew those steely blue eyes and rough voice belonged to Ryan.

"Scream and I will kill you, which would screw up my plan," he said, slowly taking his hand away and moving his body on top of hers. He then pinned her to the bed.

"What do you want?" Jude said shakily, her voice filled with fear.

"You really are dense aren't you? I don't want Tom to be happy, so therefore I have to screw with you," he finished as he crushed her lips beneath his.

"Get off me!" she said as she tried to push him away.

"Oh so you want it rough?" Ryan asked with a smirk as he slapped Jude across the face and wrapped a gag around her mouth. "The little whore better be quiet, we don't want Tom to see his older brother banging his slut!" he whispered as he ripped Jude's shirt to reveal a lacy black bra.

Tears fell freely down Jude's cheeks as Ryan ripped her clothes. She closed her mind to was happening to her body. Flashed of hot pain and disgust pierced through her. Thoughts of what Tommy would think of her after this haunted her mind. She had been saving herself for him and now nothing mattered. Tommy would throw her aside. All because of some stupid family problems. Jude tried to cry out but no sound would come. She was in pain, she twisted her head away from Ryan so she wouldn't have to look at him but he forced her head back to it's normal position.

"Look at me bitch!"

Jude forced her eyes shut as a fresh batch of hot tears glistened over her cheeks.

"So I was the first one to have you," Ryan's sickening voice brought her back to reality. "That makes revenge even sweeter."

Jude glared at him. He was her worst nightmare and she couldn't do anything about it.

"Well I'll see you later, no doubt about that," he said as he zipped his pants and crawled out the window.

Jude didn't move an inch. She felt used, she felt like trash. Sleep finally came after a few hours of hearing Ryan's voice over and over, and after she stared at the ceiling.

Tommy quietly tiptoed into Jude's room. He gently bent over her peaceful, sleeping body and placed a gentle kiss upon her lips.

Her eyes shot open and she instantly pushed him away. Her breathing was ragged and her expression was filled with fear.

"Hey, I'm sorry I scared you. I didn't mean to," Tommy said tenderly.

"I...it's okay. Just a bad dream," she lied and plastered a fake smile on her face.

"Okay. Well Kwest is making pancakes for breakfast."

"Alright. I'm uh going to go take a shower."

She walked away from Tommy and quickly jumped into the shower. She let the scalding hot water run over her body. She felt dirty and no matter how much soap or how hot the water was, she would never feel clean again.


	25. Chapter 25

_**Authors Note:** Okay guys, I realize that not all of you liked the last chapter. I've gotten a few nasty personal messages because of it. That doesn't bother me, since flaming and criticism is obviously part of being a writer. I hope I haven't lost all my faithful readers/reviewers. If it looks like I have lost readers and most everyone tells me this plot bites, I will think about rewriting it, instead of abandoning the whole fic together. I'll try to get two chapters out by the end of the night. _

_-------------------------------------------------------------_

"Jude are you okay in there?" Sadie asked.

"Yeah I"m fine. I'll be out in a second."

When Jude walked into the kitchen Kwest handed her a plate with a large stack of pancakes.

She pushed her food around her plate as the others had a very intense conversation.

"Jude are you okay?" Tommy asked as he inched his hand on top of hers.

"Yeah, I'm fine. Why wouldn't I be?" She said with a fake smile.

"You're just acting different."

"I'm fine. You're being paranoid." She didn't want him to find out what had happened last night. She didn't want to face the embarassment or the pity he would possibly give her.

"Okay, maybe I am but that's because I'm such a good boyfriend," Tommy playfully smiled.

"Sure, whatever Quincy," she said with a fake laugh. Everything was fake now, everything was a put on...a show.

The day went by fairly quick. Jude jumped at the slightest sound. Tommy snuck up behind her, wrapped her arms around her, and she had screamed bloody murder. Poor Tommy didn't know what to think or do.

After dinner Jude quietly excused herself from the table and went back to her room. She checked to see if the windows were locked in both her room and the bathroom. She wanted Tommy to come and hold her, tell her everything was going to be okay but the thought of human touch scared her. The light caresses Tommy and her had shared before seemed like punishment now.

"Jude," Sadie knocked on the door. "Can I talk to you?"

"Um, yeah. Come in."

Sadie opened the door and walked over to the bed. She sat down on the bed and looked at her sister. "What's going on?"

"What do you mean?"

"Everytime Tommy gets near you, you turn to ice. You were as distant as could be today and you hardly ate anything."

"I'm just having a bad day okay," Jude replied, hoping Sadie wouldn't pry anymore.

"Jude I've seen you when you have bad days...you wake up, blare hard rock music, and sing your lungs out. That's a bad day, this is like major."

"Nothing happened!"

"Fine. I still don't believe you though."

"I don't really care Sades. What are Kwest and Tommy doing?" she asked, changing the subject.

"Talking about that jerk Ryan. He sounds like a real piece of work. Kwest said he called you a whore?"

"Yeah...so. Maybe I am."

"Jude, you are anything but a whore."

"Yeah well I kind of feel like it."

"That's not normal Jude-speak. What happened?"

"Nothing!"

"Liar. You do realize you can't lie worth crap."

"So, maybe I don't want to tell you."

"Wait, did you and Tommy..."

"No! Althought that would have been better," Jude replied. She didn't want to tell her sister but a feeling deep inside told her she had to tell someone before she exploded.

"Would you stop beating around the bush and just tell me Jude."

"Fine. Last night after I went to bed...Tommy's brother somehow got in the house."

"What? Why didn't you tell anyone?"

"Sadie shut up and let me talk or I won't tell you at all," Jude informed her. She told herself she would not cry. She was going to stay calm. Last night was over and there was nothing that could be done about it.

"Okay, okay."

"He came into my room...and he, he hit me. And..." Jude's voice faltered and she couldn't finish, for fear of crying.

Sadie's eyes began to widen. She didn't want to believe what her younger sister was telling her, but she knew Jude was not the type of person to joke or lie about this sort of thing. "He...he raped you?" she finally managed to get out.

Jude nodded her head. No tears fell, the world didn't crash down, and nobody had died. She had told someone and nothing had happened except a huge weight had been lifted from her shoulders.

"Oh God, Jude."

"Sadie don't say anything else or you're going to make me cry and I don't feel like doing that right now."

"O...Okay." Sadie said as she got up and walked out the door.

She found Tommy and Kwest sitting in the kitchen having an in depth conversation. "Um Tommy I think you should go talk to Jude."

"What? Why?"

"Just...just trust me okay."

Tommy started to worry. Sadie's voice was shaky and faltering. Had something happened to Jude?


	26. Chapter 26

"Jude," Tommy said opening the door to her room.

"Great," she thought to herself. "She just had to go get him didn't she?"

"Hey Tommy," she said in an upbeat voice.

"Sadie said I should come talk to you, what's wrong?"

"Nothing," Jude said.

"Somehow I don't believe that. Please tell me."

"Sadie seems to have a big mouth why not go ask her?" Jude said with resentment.

"You're right I could go ask her, but I want to hear what's wrong from you."

"Oh I'm really doubting you want to know this."

"Try me."

"Ryan came back last night."

"WHAT?" Tommy asked outraged.

"Yeah, that's not the half of it. He came to my room, why I got to be so lucky I don't know."

Tommy dreaded the next words that came out of her mouth. Part of him already knew what was going to be said. Instead of making her tell him he decided to apeak. "I know what he did," Tommy said.

"What? You knew about this?"

"No I didn't know technically, but I can just about guess and I should have been there to protect you. I'm sorry Jude," he said as he shook his head.

"It's not your fault," Jude said, trying to hold herself together.

Tommy looked up and looked into her sea-green eyes. She was so beautiful yet he could see the pain that was etched into her.

They sat in silence until Tommy looked over and saw tears running down her cheeks. He swiftly wrapped his arm around her and brought her close.

Jude stiffened at first but she knew Tommy would never hurt her. She felt his warm body and smelled his sweet smelling cologne. She knew she was safe.

Meanwhile Sadie was out in the kitchen explaining things to Kwest.

"I knew he was going to do something stupid. I just never thought he'd do this," Kwest said.

"She's hurting Kwest, I know she is. But she's acting so strong and calm," Sadie said, a few tears falling down her face.

Kwest walked over to Sadie and hugged her. "Maybe it's her way of dealing with it. Not everyone handles things the same." He knew this was going to be hard on everyone, but he knew Jude was the one that had to carry the burden.

"I'm going to kill him Jude."

"No," she sniffed.

"Jude he had no right to do that!"

"I know Tommy, but I'm not going to let you do something that stupid. I'll be okay."

"No you won't! This will haunt you forever Jude."

"Maybe it will-" she trailed off.

Tommy pulled away from her and held her hand. "You need to go to a doctor Jude."

"No!" she yelled, her eyes widening. "I won't go Tommy!"

"What? Why the hell not?"

"Becuase I don't want to," she said as she stood up and hobbled around her room with the crutches.

"Jude there is no way we can get Ryan arrested if you don't go!"

"I don't want anyone else touching me!" she screamed. "I don't want the whole world to know that Jude Harrison, Instant Star, was raped by her producer's older brother!"  
"But-"

"No!" she said as she hobbled out of the room.

"Jude wait!"

"Just let me go Tommy," she said in an eerily calm voice.

Tommy let go of her hand and let her go into the studio.

She locked the door behind her and sat down in front of the sound board. She loved Tommy but she had to keep pushing him away. She couldn't deal with everything. She made a vow to herself that she would not turn to pills or blades. Ryan would not have that power over her.

"She won't go to the doctor," Tommy announced as he sat down in the kitchen and let out a defeated sigh.

"So she's just going to let him get away?" Sadie asked.

"She doesn't want to go and I won't force her Sadie."

"How could he do this to her?" Sadie rhetorically asked.

"He wants revenge Sadie. This has nothing to do with Jude. She's just his pawn."

"This is sick man, even for him," Kwest said.

"I know and I want to beat the crap out of him for doing what he did."

"What do we do now?" Sadie asked as she looked in the direction of the studio.

"I don't know. I guess we give her space. That's what she wants," Tommy said quietly.

"What if she hurts herself?"

"She won't," Tommy said as he walked back to his own room and sat on his bed. He knew there was no way he could ever grasp what had happened to Jude last night or even what was going through her head today. This was one thing Tommy couldn't take away. He could take away the pills, and he could take away the razors. But, he could not take away the pain of someone violating her.


	27. Chapter 27

_**Authors Note: **Okay guys, still gettin a little bit of mixed opinions on this but that's alright. I'm really sorry if these updates are short and are literally crap. I've been so busy and usually I write during school, plus I'm sick so not everything is processing so well today. Well anyways, I hope you review!_

_--------------------------------------------------------------------------_

Jude sat silently in the studio for a few hours before she grabbed her guitar. She sang a few scales and proceeded to sing a slower version of "24 Hours." She then jotted a few lyrics down and set them to a slow, flowing, melody.

_You took away my innocence_

_My luagh, my smile, my hope _

_Who gave you so much power. _

She knew she had nothing and threw the pen across the room.

"Hey, you were this close to taking off my head," Kwest motioned with his hands.

"Sorry Kwest. I didn't mean to. How'd you get in anyway? I thought I locked the door."

Kwest held up a small silver object. "Tommy gave me the key. I thought I'd come check on you."

"I'm fine, just trying to write some new stuff but nothing is working."

"I liked your melody. The words may need a little help though. I'm sure Tommy would give you a hand."

"I'll figure it out."

Kwest reached for the guitar and started to strum a haunting, soft melody.

"I really like that, but I didn't know you played."

"I haven't played in a long time."

"Oh, well whatever you just played was really pretty."

"Thanks. Why don't you and Tommy write something for it?"

"Why are you obsessed with Tommy and me writing together?" she asked defensively.

"I don't know, maybe because you two come up with great music."

"Yes you can Jude. Whatever you feel just write it. Pour everything out onto paper."

"I don't want the world to know Kwest," she said softly.

"You don't have to specifically say what happened," Kwest said.

"I just, Kwest I can't. It's a lot harder than you think!" she yelled.

"I realize that Jude, but Tommy's blaming himself for it."

"Why? It's not his fault."

"It may not technically be his fault, but why do you think Ryan chose to attack you? He wants revenge Jude and Tommy's worried about you."

"Why? He's already accomplished what he wanted to."

"Do you really think he's going to stop Jude? All of us are in this. We're all close to Tommy."

"We're not in danger or anything Kwest," Jude said, trying to reassure herself.

"Tommy wants us to take you back with us tonight."

"No way!" she said as she glared at Kwest.

"You both are so damn stubborn you know that?"

"I'm not going to just leave him here Kwest."

"Tommy can take care of himself."

"So you want me to go back with you and Sadie tonight. Where am I supposed to stay?"

"With Sadie and me in my apartment."

"Great."

"Georgia wants you back at G Major too."

"Fine, okay I"ll go."

"Good, because if you said no I think Tommy would drag you out to the car. We leave in four hours."

"Okay."

Kwest stood up and made his way out of the studio.

"How'd it go?" Tommy asked anxiously.

"She doesn't want to go, but I convinced her to."

"Thanks."

"You should probably go talk to her man."

"I know, but what do I say to the girl I love, who was just raped by my brother."

"Whatever comes to mind Tommy."


	28. Chapter 28

_**Authors Note: **Okay everyone I know this chapter took longer to put up and it's not much, but I have been sooo busy! It's crazy! But I should be able to post another chapter tomorrow, Sunday, and possible Monday, but not too sure about that one. I hope you like this one and please review! _

Tommy gently nodded and slowly walked to the door. He took a deep breath, walked into the studio, and sat in a chair beside Jude.

"Why are you making me leave?"

"Because I can't have anything else happen to you."

"I'll be fine...if I stay here with you."

"Jude," Tommy started.

"What? You don't want to see me anymore? Can't bare to look at me and not think of what happened!" she yelled.

"It's nothing like that," Tommy said softly.

"Well it has to be something. Oh I know, it's gotta be some manly ego thing. Like your brother got there first!" Jude screamed.

"Jude stop!"

"Why?" she yelled, tears now running freely down her face.

"Because not one thing you just said is even remotely true. I love you Jude. It bothers me that you were hurt but it does not change how I see you."

"How do you see me?" she pleaded for an answer through her red-rimmed eyes.

"I see a courageous, young woman who has a fiery spirit and a quick disposition. I see a beautiful girl whom I love to death. But, while I see all those great and wonderful things, I also see a scared little girl who doesn't know who to trust. So, instead she pushes everyone away purely because of the fear of getting hurt."

Jude didn't move a muscle, the look on her face shocked. Tommy knew her better than anyone.

"I see all that." Tommy assured her.

"I don't want to leave you."

"I know and I don't want you to go either, but you have to Jude."

"Why don't you come back with us?"

"I have to stay here Jude. Maybe work on that solo album," he joked.

A small smile creeped upon Jude's face. "I still think you should record Frozen."

"The only way I will ever record that song is if we sing it together."

Jude wipes her eyes and looked at Tommy. The pure blue objects bore into her soul like a million needles. "Will you call me?"

"Of course I will, everyday. I'll even e-mail and you know how much I hate computers."

"Jude looked at him with loving eyes. "How long is this going to last?"

"Not sure," he said quietly.

"Oh."

"Jude," Kwest called. "You should probably get pakced so we can go."

A small groan of protest was emitted from Jude's body.

"Come on, I'll help," Tommy offered as he grabbed her hand.

Jude followed Tommy into her room and started packing. She was eerily quiet and Tommy started to worry about her.

"What's wrong?" he tenderly asked.

"I just, I don't like being in this room."

"Oh," he said quietly, mentally slapping himself for not thinking of that himself.

Jude shoved a few pairs of heans in her suitcase and quickly finished pakcing.

"Ready?" Kwest asked as she walked out of the room with Tommy close behind.

"I guess," she said timidly.

Kwest grabbed her bag and took it out to the car. Sadie followed so Jude and Tommy could say goodbye.

"I'll see you later girl."

"Yeah," she said, holding back tears.

"Hey," he said as he pulled her into a tight hug. "I'll be back home with you before you know it."

"I know. I'm just going to miss you."

"I'll miss you too," he said as he leaned in to kiss her soft, red lips. She gently pulled away and looked down and he instead opted to kiss her forehead. "You should get going."

"I love you," she said as she wrapped her arms around his neck and hugged him one last time before pulling away and walking out the door. Hot tears fell down her cheeks as she opened the door to the car.


	29. Chapter 29

_**Authors Note: **Okay guys, I know my writing has been suffering lately, and I feel that I've been losing reviews. I'm really sorry if these last few chapters haven't been catching your attention like they should. I've been busy and my mind hasn't been where it should be lately, but I'm trying and hopefully this week and next will be much better. I hope you stick with this fic though. Anyways I'm going to stop rambling. Review please! _

The car slowed to a stop in front of a large gray apartment building.

"Here it is," Kwest said, trying to lighten the mood. Jude hadn't said a word since they left the cabin.

Jude grudgingly stepped out of the car and followed Kwest and Sadie up the three flights of stairs to the apartment. They had just entered the room when her cell phone rang. She didn't bother to check who it was before answering.

"Hello."

"Hey," came Tommy's deep, sultry voice. "Where are you?"

"At Kwest's," she said as she walked into a secluded hallway.

"You don't sound too happy," Tommy said with a frown.

"That's probably because I'm not," she said sarcastically.

"Jude, can you please just try to make the best out of this."

"Of course I'll try. It's just going to take time. I haven't been home since my tour started. That was over four months ago."

"I know. Look, I'm sorry to make this short but I need to drive into town or I won't have anything to eat. Go to work tomorrow and put down some kick-ass tracks for me alright?"

Jude smiled to herself. "I will."

"I love you."

"I love you too."

"Bye girl, talk to you tomorrow."

"Bye."

Kwest showed Jude to her room and helped her move things around. Sadie then came and helped her unpack.

"I know you don't want to be here Jude," Sadie said as she put a few folded articles of clothing into a dresser drawer.

"It's not really that Sadie. It's just, what about Mom and Dad? Don't they even care?"

"I, I really don't know Jude. I haven't tlaked to them either."

"It's like I was forced to grow up in less than six months."

Sadie walked over and hugged her sister. "I know and you shouldn't have had to."

"I don't know what I'd do without you and Kwest and especially Tommy."

"He loves you so much Jude."

"I know he does. I wish he was here."

"I know. Listen, I'm going to let you get some sleep. You have a big day tomorrow. Kwest says it's back to work for you."

"Yeah," Jude said with a smile. "I'm excited to go back to work but not so much for the publicity and all the questions."

"Don't worry sis. Everything will be fine. Night," she said as she walked into the spacious living room.

Jude quickly changed into her pajamas, made sure all three windows in the room were locked, and finally crept into bed.

The next morning Kwest and Jude pulled into the G Major parking lot.

"Are you ready?"

"I guess," she said as she opened the car door and confidently walked into G Major.

"Hey," Georgia greeted her with a hug. "How are you?"

"Better."

"Good. Um, EJ wants to set up a press conference."

"No," Jude said quickly.

"Okay, uh KWest why don't you and Jude take Studio A?"

"Got it," he said as he followed Jude into the studio.

"Nobody knows right?" she asked defensively.

"No, of course not."

"Know about what?' a voice came from the shadows.


	30. Chapter 30

"Shay," Jude said shakily.

"Know about what," he repeated.

"Nothing," Jude and Kwest said in unison.

"Uh sure," Shay said as he raised his eyebrows and lounged in a chair. "Since you two aren't going to spill it, Kwest do you wanna mix up some new beats for me?"

"I don't know Shay. I mean Darius has you primarily working with Tommy."

"Tommy's not here and I have to get something done."

"I'm supposed to work with Jude."

"I'll help with Jude's music, and then you can help me with some beats."

Kwest gave Jude an 'it's your move' look.

"Yeah, that's fine. It doesn't really matter to me."

"Alright, so what do you have?" Kwest asked.

"Um, nothing."

"You mean you stayed in a secluded cabin with your producer for over a month, and you have nothing?" Shay asked.

"Well...yeah that's about it."

"We need to get to work," Kwest announced.

After many hours of deliberation, Kwest rewriting lyrics following with Shay crossing them out, and Jude getting frustrated with their bickering, they finally had a song. Jude knew the process would have gone much better if Tommy had been there to help work on it, but she knew she couldn't do anything about it.

"Jude," Darius came into the studio. "You're finally back," he said sarcastically.

"Yeah I'm back."

"I want a sophomore album Jude, and I want it now!" Darius demanded as he stormed out of the room, slamming the door behind him.

"Great,"Jude said, plopping into a chair beside Shay. "He wants another album and I have one song written."

"What about the one from the cabin?" Kwest said.

"I guess I could use that. I'd have to have Tommy send me the demo, but even then that only gives us two songs."

"Well I guess we have some work to do," Shay said.

Jude set down the first track of her new album an hour later. It was almost 9:00 p.m. by then.

"Okay Jude, let's wrap it up for the night," Kwest said.

Jude nodded and started unhooking and putting away her equipment.

"You did really good today Shorty."

"Yeah," she scoffed. "Darius wants an album now, and I have on song recorded, not even mixed."

"Don't worry about it. My uncle is all talk. Sure he wants an album right now, but there's nothing he can do about it. Georgia is your boss, not Darius."

"I don't think I can do this anymore Shay. It's too hard."

"Where's Jude Harriosn and what have you done with her?" SHay joked.

"Very funny."

"Seriously, this isn't something I would have heard from the old Jude."

"The old Jude went on tour and never came back."

"I don't believe that and I don't think you do either."

"Jude, let's go," Kwest called.

"Coming. See you tomorrow."

"Later."

By the time Kwest and Jude arrived at the apartment, Sadie was already asleep.

"I'm going to go to bed. Will you be okay?" Kwest asked.

"Yeah, fine. Don't worry about me. I'm going to go on my computer for awhile and then go to sleep."

"Alright, night."

"Night," Jude said as she walked to her room. She plopped down at her computer and clicked on the blinking window which told her she had two new messages. One was a welcome home e-card from Jamie and a short note from Tommy.

TO: Rockerchick33

FROM: tommyq18

Jude,

I told you I would e-mail you so here goes. I hope you appreciate this because you know I can't type worth a crap. I know today was your first day back at G Major. Hopefully everything went okay and Darius wasn't too hard on you. Just remember you answer to Georgia, no one else. I miss you a lot. It's so different and quiet here with everyone gone. I actually wrote a song today. I know, I know, it's my job right? Anyways, I wrote it for your new album. I don't know if you'll like it or not but I thought I'd try. I love you Jude.

Love,

Tommy

A smile quickly came upon Jude's face as she read the e-mail. They'd been apart for only one day but she already missed him and it was obvious that he missed her. She quickly typed a friendly note to Jamie, and a more personal one to Tommy. After that she crawled into her warm, welcoming bed and fell into a deep slumber.


	31. Chapter 31

_**Authors Note: **Okay, you may get lots of chapters this weekend, especially considering that a new sneak peak preview of instant star has been airing tonight! I am so excited for the premiere! Tommy looks sexier than ever, and Jamie doesn't look bad either. Anyways, I hope this chapter doesn't totally bite like most of the past few have...you may not think so but I do lolz. Review please!_

The next morning she awoke in a cold sweat. It had been like this every night since IT had happened. She had been dreaming about Ryan again. She quickly calmed herself down and went to take a shower and get ready, despite the fact that it was 5:00 A.M.

She took her time getting dressed, and then walked toward the kitchen to pour herself a glass of orange juice.

"Hey, your up early."

"I couldn't sleep Sadie," Jude said.

"Me neither."

"Kwest still sleeping?"

"Yeah. I checked on him before I came out here."

"I can never sleep lately."

"Why don't you just go to the doctor Jude?"

"What's the point Sadie? They can't take everything away and make it all better. It doesn't work that way."

"What if you have an STD or what if you're pregnant?"

"Sadie, chill okay. I'm fine."

"You don't know that Jude."

"Sades just leave me alone. I have a new album to finish, I don't need to worry about this."

"But you should be worrying about it."

"I don't want to!" Jude yelled as she felt the vibration of her cell phone against her hip.

"Hello," she said roughly.

"Hey, what's wrong?" Tommy's soothing voice asked.

"Nothing really," she said as Sadie retreated from the room.

"Somehow I don't believe you."

"Sadie wants me to go to the doctor and I don't want to. They can't change any of it," she said, pulling herself onto the counter.

"Oh. How was work yesterday?" Tommy quickly changed the subject.

"Alright I guess. Darius wants a new album, Kwest and Say are trying to help but they just end up disagreeing, and it's frustrating."

"I'm sorry Jude. I'll try to make a day trip and stop by to help."

"You don't know how much that would rock. Thanks for the e-mail by the way."

"I told you I'd send one."

"It was sweet," she smiled.

"I'm glad you liked it. How are you?"

"Fine," Jude shortly answered.

"Really""

"Yes Tommy. I'm perfectly fine. Kwest and Sadie watch me like a hawk. I could hurt myself even if I wanted to."

Tommy let out a short sigh of relief. "You don't know how glad I am to here you say that."

"What about you? No drinking right?"

"No. Porita's been calling every day to ask me."

Jude felt a pang of jealousy shoot through her. She knew what Porita and Tommy had was long since over but it still hur to know that they had been romantic and married.

"Jude?"

"Yeah, I'm still here. Sorry, just kind of spaced out for a bit."

"Don't worry about it. Do you have to go to work today?"

"Yeah," Jude said as she saw Kwest giving the tell-tale let's go signal to her. "I have to go right now matter-of-fact. I'll talk to you later okay."

"Okay. Love you."

"Love you, bye."

Jude followed Kwest out the door and started yet another day in her "normal" life.


	32. Chapter 32

_**Authors Note: **You prolly get sick of me talking here lolz. Umm, not much to really say about this chapter. Hopefully I'll get another one up by tonight and credit for the song at the end goes to "Disney". It's from "Highschool Musical" and it's called Breakin' Free. Awesome song btw. Review please!_

****G Major was pure chaos when Kwest and Jude arrived. Jude had never seen so many people packed into the small building.

"What's going on?" Jude whispered to Kwest.

"To be honest I have no idea."

Jude looked around the room and saw EJ talking to a tall attractive blonde woman. Georgia was flitting around the room, talking to different people, none of whome Jude had seen before.

Kwest told her to sit down and hang out for awhile until he found out what was going on.

"Hey Shorty," Jude finally heard a familiar voice.

"What's going on?"

"Where do you want me to start? "

"Whever."

"Darius just set the due dates for our albums."

"That still doesn't tell me why there's so many other people here."  
"Reporters Jude. They all want to talk to you."

"Why haven't any of them talked to me then?"

"Georgia got restraining orders on most of the big names."

"Wow, I'm impressed."

"You better be."

"So should I even ask when the release date is for my album?"

"Your birthday."

"But that's less than 3 months away! Why did he have to go and do that?"

"Beats me. My uncle likes making people squirm Jude, you know that."

"Jude, let's go work on that new song. EJ's trying to get all of these people to leave," Kwest said.

"Alright," she said as Kwest and Shay walked into Studio B. She sighed and reluctantly followed them. It was going to be a very long day.

_We're breakin free_

_We're soarin', flyin_

_There's not a star in Heaven _

_That we can't reach. _

"Jude," Kwest's voice came over the intercom. "This isn't your kind of music."

"So what? Why should I come out with the same stuff over and over. You don't like it?"

"That's not what I said Jude."  
Shay glared at Kwest and the two began to banter back and forth about the song. Jude finally got fed up and walked out of the studio. They didn't even notice.

SHe walked outside and sat on the steps of G Major. Memories egan to flood over her. When Tommy told her he was leaving, this was the first place she went to. So much had happened since then. She put her face in her hands and looked at the solid concrete.  
"Hey," Georgia said, sitting down beside Jude. "I got rid of all the reporters."

"Great."

"Having prouder problems?"

"You could say that."

"Shay asked me if he could help with your album. He wants out of the singing biz and he thought this would be a great first project for him."

"What? He never told me that."

"He hasn't even told Darius that he wants to produce instead of sing. Let's just say I don't want to be around when he does either."

"Great, then I'll have to deal with him and Kwest everyday."

Georgia laughed a little. "Not everyday."

"Enough."

There was a short pause before Georgia cleared her throat and opened her mouth to speak. "How are you Jude? Really be honest here."

"I'm fine."

"So that's why you left the studio and came out here?"

"I told you Kwest and Shay were driving me nuts."

"Sure."

"It's a lot of different things Georgia."

"Like Tommy?"

"Uh, I don't know what you're talking about."

"I know Jude and as long as you try to keep out of the tabloids, it's okay."

"Really?"

"Really," Georgia gave a warm smile to her.

"So you're not mad?"

"Well I would rather have you you wait until you were 18, but no, I'm not mad."

"This is so cool," Jude said.

"Did I just hear punk-rock princess, Jude Harrison, say cool?" Georgia joked.

"Yes you did," Jude laughed."

"You should probably get back in there before Kwest and Shay rip each other apart."

"Do I have to?" Jude whined. "I mean I thought I had to worry about Tommy and Shay killing each other, not Kwest and SHay."

"Yes you have to. This is Kwest's first project where's he's head producer, but that doesn't mean it's not your album. You just sometimes have to remind them of that."

"Thanks Georgia."

"Anytime Jude," she said as she gave the younger woman a quick hug.

Jude marched through G Major and into the recording studio.

"Where'd you go?" Kwest asked.

"Listen up. This is my album, my music, my voice, my thing. If you two don't stop bickering like to old ladies you're both of the project. It'shard enough for me to concentrate lately without you two bitching to each other!"

Shay and Kwest both looked at each other, eyes at least twice their normal size, and looked back at Jude.

"Um okay," Shay said.

Jude smiled, confidently smoothed the front of her shirt, and walked into the sound booth.

"Let's record."

Kwest was still in awe so Shay hit the record button and Jude's strong, sensual voice poured over the speakers.

_We're soarin, flyin',_

_There's not a star in heaven that we can't reach _

_If we're tryin, so we're breakin free _

_You know the world can see us_

_In a way that is different than who we are _

_Creating space between us 'til we're seperate hearts._

_But your faith it gives me strenth, _

_Strenth to believe _

_W'ere breakin free_

_We're soarin, flyin_

_There's not a star in heaven that we can't reach _

_If we're tryin, yeah we're breakin free _

_Oh we're breakin free._

_Can you feel it building _

_Like a wave the ocean just can't control _

_Connected by a feeling in our very souls _

_Rising till it lifts us up _

_So everyone can see _

_  
We're breakin free _

_We're soarin, flyin_

_There's not a star in heaven that we can't reach _

_If we're tryin, oh were breakin free _

_Running, climbing_

_Get to the place to be all that we can be _

_Now's the time so we're breakin free _

_We're breakin free _

_More than hope, more than faith _

_This is true, this is fate and together we see it coming_

_More than you, more than me _

_Not a want but a need_

_Both of us breakin free _

_Soarin, flyin _

_There's not a star in heaven that we can't reach _

_fi we're tryin yeah we're breakin free _

_Breakin free _

_We're running, climbing_

_To get to the place to be all that we can be _

_Now's the time so we're breakin free _

_We're breakin free _

_We know the world can see us _

_In a way that's different than who we are..._


	33. Chapter 33

**Authors Note: **_As per usual...read and review please!_

For the next two months Jude could be found in the studio every day. Either she was working with her private tutor, or slaving away on her album. Tommy would come home every other weekend to her and things had never been better between them. Jude was actually happy. Her 17th birthday was less than two weeks away and Tommy had promised he would come for the party.

"So how's that new single coming?" Tommy said during a phone call later in the week.

"Alright. Darius hates it, but I gave up on trying to please him a long time ago."

"Are you going to have it done by your party?"

"I hope so. I want it to go on my album, which is supposedly being released on my birthday."

"I can't wait to see you."

Jude laughed. "I can't wait to see you either. Only nine more days."

"Nine more days until I get to see my punk-rock-brunette princess." Tommy thought about Jude's once fiery red hair. Sadie had dyed it a deep brown shade about a month after they'd moved back to Toronto.

Jude smiled. "You know you like my hair."

"I like everything about you."

Jude giggled flirtatiously.

"Jude!" A loud voice bellowed.

"Who the hell was that?"

Jude groaned. "Darius. He's driving me nuts."

"Hey chill. I know you want to tell him what you really think of him but if you do he'll stick you in some taco commercial."

Jude stifled a bout of laughter. "I don't think I could pull the costume off like you did."

"That is so not funny."

"JUDE! Whoever you're talking to is not important!"

"That's what he thinks," she whispered. "Love you."

"Love you too."

"What do you want now Darius?'

"I want that album but Georgia tells me you only have four songs done. That album should have been mailed three weeks ago!"

"I told you in the beginning that I couldn't get it done it time."

"There is no can't in this business. You will have this album done a week after your birthday!" he yelled as he stormed out of the room.

"That sounded fun," Kwest said.

"Oh yeah, loads. There is no way we can get it done it time."

"Don't worry about it Jude. I'll figure something out. Sadie's here to take you shopping for your part next week."

"Alright. Thanks Kwest," she said as she hugged him.

"Anytime."

"Hey sis ready to go?" Sadie asked in her oh-so perfect voice.

"I guess."

"We need to find the perfect dress for you," Sadie said as they got into the car and drove to the mall.

"That's the dress Jude."

Jude smiled at her reflection. "Do you really think so?"

"It's gorgeous!" Sadie gushed. The dress looked perfect on her little sistrer. It was a deep purple satin that went well with her now brunette waves. Shimmery, purple sequins adorned the fitted, strapless bodice. A ribbon criss-cross tie went from below her shoulder blades to above her hips. It was a floor length dress with a slit up the left side.

They bought the dress and drove back to the apartment. Jude went straight to her room and e-mailed Tommy about the dress. Sadie and Kwest were going clubbing so Jamie and Kat were coming over for the night.

"Have fun," Jude called as Sadie and Kwest walked out the door.

She looked back at the clock...7:00. Jamie and Kat wouldn't be coming for another half hour. Being alone scared the crap out of her so she decided to call Tommy. \


	34. Chapter 34

"Hello."

"Hey."

"Hey sweetie, what's up?"

"Just trying to kill some time before Kat and Jamie come over."

"Your by yourself?"

"Only for a little while."

"Oh. How was your day?"

"Besides Darius yelling at me, alright."

"When I come back I'm kicking his ass."

Jude smiled. She loved it when Tommy was protective of her. Most girlfriends hated it, but I guess their relationship wasn't a typical one."It's not that bad."

"Sure."

"What did you do today?" Jude asked, changing the subject.

Tommy puased for a moment before he told her. "I um, was working on some songs."

"Oh really? What?"

"Frozen."

"Now way! Tommy I'm so excited for you!"

"Hold on. I was just working on it, that doesn't mean I'm going to record it."

"I know, I'm just glad you're working on it." She heard the doorbell ring and looked up at the security monitor Kwest had installed. She saw Jamie's unruly hair, and Kat's short stature. "I'm so sorry to cut this short, but Kat and Jamie are here," she said as she walked toward the door.

"Hey, don't worry about it girl. I love you."

"Love you," she said as she opened the door.

"That was a nice welcome," Jamie joked.

"I was talking to Tommy."

"Figures."

"Ignore him. He's just crabby because his car finally died," Kat explained.

"No way. The station wagon finally kicked the bucket?"

"Hey don't joke, I liked that car," Jamie said as he shoved three cartons of ice cream into the freezer.

Kat laughed and shooke her head."Sometimes I wonder why I put up with him."

"Because you love me."

Kat rolled her eyes and looked at Jude. "So where's this dress?"

Jamie plopped himself onto the couch and lficked on the tv while the two girls fawned over the dress.

"Wow, it's so pretty," Kat said fingering over the sequins.

"Isn't it? I mean I wish I could've gotten a Kat original but sources say she's booked up."

"Hey, your 18th birthday dress will be a Kat original."

Jude laughed and carefully placed the dress back into the closet. "I just hope my 17th birthday goes a little better than my 16th."

"How could it be worse? You and Tommy are together now, and happy."

"Yeah I know," she said absentmindedly. Her mind wandering back to Ryan again. Tommy, Kwest, and Sadie were still the only ones who knew what had happened.

"Are you girls going to make me watch movies all by myself?" Jamie yelled from the couch.

"We're coming," Kat yelled back.

The three best friends sat around, laughed, talked, ate ice cream, and watched movies. It was like old times before her tour, before her 16th birthday, before all the chaos had happened, and she loved it.

Kwest and Sadie arrived at the apartment around 1 A.M. They quietly walked toward the living room and saw Jude fast asleep on the couch, Jamie sprawled out on the floor, and Kat curled up on a chair. Sadie went and grabbed a few blankets to cover them up.

"I feel like I'm her mother," Sadie said cynically.

"Don't...you're her sister."

"I know that, but apparently my parents don't. They always used to be there for us Kwest and now it's like we don't exist. Where were they when Jude almost killed herself, or when she was raped! Where were they!" she screamed on the verge of tears.

"Hey," Kwest said, pulling her close to his chest and stroking her long blonde hair. "Everything will work out."

"How can it Kwest? My parents will never come back and whose to say that Ryan's going to stop."

"Nobody does, but we have to believe he will."

"Morning sleepyhead," a deep voice whispered in Jude's ear.

"Huh?" Jude opened her eyes. "Tommy!" she wrapped her arms around his neck. "I thought you weren't coming until next week."

"Change of plans girl," he said as he wrapped his arms around her.

Jude sat up on the couch and looked into Tommy's ocean blue eyes. "I'm so glad you're here Tommy."

"Me too."

"Are you going to stay until next week?"

"That's the plan. I thought I"d try and help get your album done."

"That would be so great Tommy," she looked around the room. "Where's Kat and Jamie?"

"In the kitchen eating cereal."

"I still can't believe your going to be here more than two days."

"Actually I might be staying Jude...for good."

A wide smile spread across her slim face. "Really?"

"Really," Tommy said as he picked her up and spun her around.

Jude giggled and kissed Tommy. "I love you so much."

"Likewise," he smiled. They had gotten so far in the past three months. After Ryan's assault, Tommy could barely touch her without her shying away from him. It hurt that she could be scared of him, but he didn't hold it against her. But now, Jude lived for the kisses she recieved from Tommy and loved his gentle touch.

"Hey there are other people in this house you know," Sadie joked as she gave Tommy a brotherly hug.

"Hey, and yes we know that."

"It's good to have you back man," Kwest said.

"It's good to be back."

Tommy had barely finished his sentence when his cell phone rang. Kwest and Sadie retreated to the kitchen while Jude stayed in place.

"Hello."

"Hey Tommy it's me Portia. I was wondering if you wanted to do something tonight."

"Oh, well I'm back in Toronto."

"Really? For good?"

"Yeah."

"I'm happy for you. We both know Jude needs you. Especially now with my brother bugging her all the time."

"Yeah."

"Well I'm going to let you go. I'll talk to you later."

"Alright bye."

"Who was that?" Jude asked as he put the phone into his back pocket.

"Portia."

"Oh," Jude sighed.

"Hey, Jude you have nothing to worry about. Portia's my past, you're my future."

"That's good to know," she said as Tommy protectively wrapped his arm around her shoulder and walked into the kitchen.

Tommy poured himself a bowl of cheerios and handed the box to Jude. She shook her head and pushed the box away.

"What's wrong?" he asked.

"Nothing, just not hungry I guess."

"Okay," he shrugged as he poured milk into the bowl and started shoveling spoonfulls into his mouth.

"Guys we should really get to G Major before Georgia calls again," Kwest said, reminding Jude of their tardiness to work yesterday.

"Hey, sorry my alarm didn't go off."

"Let's go," Tommy said reluctantly. He wanted to spend the day with Jude...alone, not with a bunch of other employees flitting around.

Kwest quickly kissed Sadie on the cheek, Jamie and Kat said goodbye to everyone, and Jude grabbed her lyric book before leaving the house.

"Well, if it isn't little Tommy Q."


	35. Chapter 35

AUTHORS NOTE: Okay guys, this one ends kind of dumb, but that's all I have written at the moment so it'll have to do. Sorry guys! I'll promise another chapter tomorrow and maybe a short one tonight...

Tommy grimaced at the nickname and the sound of the man's voice. He turned around and politely shook his hand. "D, I wish I could say it was nice to see you, but it's really not."

Darius scoffed and glared Tommy down. "Where's our girl?"

"In Studio A with Kwest."

"Look Tommy, I have demands alright. You're back now and your Jude's main producer, so it's your ass that's on the line if that album's not finished on timme."

"You're not Jude's boss D, just her manager."

"I call the shots around here Tommy, if you don't like it, too bad."

"What do you mean by that?"

"You're looking at the newest partner of G Major."

"What?"

"Georgia got herself into a little financial rut and I bailed her out," he said with a smug smile on his face.

Tommy gaped at Darius and turned around to walk into Studio A. "Uh Kwest could I talk to you for a minute?"

"Sure," he said, following Tommy into the small kitchenette. "What's up?"

"Does Jude know Darius is a partner in G Major?"

"No. I just found out myself a few days ago."

Tommy rand his hand through his thick, dark hair. "As if she's not stressed out enough."

"She doesn't need to know man...at least not for now."

"I can't believe Georgia would do that."

"She had to. G Major was about to go bankrupt and then where would I, or you, or especially Jude go?"

"She knew she could come to me Kwest. I have the money and she knew I wanted to be a partner eventually."

"Tommy just let it go okay. There's nothing we can do about it now."

"Guys can we get started?"

Tommy turned around to face Jude. "Yeah let's go girl."

Six hours later, Jude was struggling with the chord progression in her new song. Tommy could se she was getting flustered and frustrated. He told Kwest to take a fifteen minute break and walked into the sound booth.

"Hey."

She set her guitar down and looked at Tommy. "I can't do anything today."

"Here," he handed her the guitar and sat behind her. He gently slipped his arms around her and put his hands on top of hers. He started to make her hands play the complicated chords. "See you can do it."

Jude turned around to face Tommy and he crushed her pouty lips beneath his.

"Guys, we're in public here."

Tommy pulled away from Jude to see EJ. "Hey."

"Hey yourselves. Look, Georgia booked you both for Under the Mic tomorrow."

"What? Why me?" Tommy asked.

"Georgia said you've been working on some new stuff."

"Well yeah, but nothings ready to go public."

"Not my problem Tom," EJ said, spinning around on her four-inch heels and exiting the room.

"Shit," Tommy said running his hands through his hair.

"Hey, chill."

"I'm supposed to be telling you that, not the other way around," said an agitated Tommy.

"We'll figure something out. Don't worry about it."

"I'm supposed to have a new song by tomorrow and I haven't sang solo in public for over three years."

"Tommy you'll do fine. We'll stay late tonight and work something out."

"Jude it's already 6:00. It'll take at least five hours to come up with lyrics, record, and mix."

"I'm sure Kwest will stay and if not, he taught me how to work the table. Plus we'll get to spend some time together," she teased.

"Yeah, because I'm going to get a lot done with you standing here."

Jude laughed and punched him in the arm. "Let's just get to work.

Numerous coffee runs, made my Kwest, hundreds of sheets of paper, and four guitar strings later, they finally had a tangible song. Jude did a few background harmonies on the track and played guitar.

"I told you you could do it," Jude said as she hugged Tommy. Kwest had gone home about an hour ago and left Jude and Tommy to finish mixing the song. "I really like it."

"Thanks, but I couldn't have done it without Kwest, and especially you. You wrote half the lyrics."

"You're the artist," Jude countered.

"Have I ever told you how cute you are?" Tommy asked, slipping his arms around her waist and kissing her forehead.

"Maybe, but I like hearing it," Jude giggled.

"Let's go home girl."

The pair arrived home around 1:30 and Tommy fell asleep on the couch while Jude slept in her room. She tossed and turned for awhile, and finally tip-toed out to the living room and knelt down beside Tommy. She tenderly touched his shoulder and his eyes fluttered open.

"Hey, shouldn't you be sleeping?"

"Come here, I want to show you something."

"Uh okay."

"Grab your blanket."

Tommy nodded and grabbed the blanket as he eyed her oddly. He was still half asleep as he followed her out the door and up a few stairs.

"Jude where are we going?"

"You have no patience Quincy," Jude said laughing.

"Well it's like three in the morning. The only thing I should be seeing is the insides of my eyelids."

Jude laughed, grabbed his hand, and pulled him up the fire escape.

"We're here," she announced as she looked out on the city of Toronto.

"Wow, it's beautiful," Tommy awed.

"When you were gone, I would come up here and look at all the lights and the cars. I wrote and cried, and sang. I did everything up here. It's my secret spot."

Tommy came behind her and wrapped his arms around her neck. "I'm worry Jude.

"For what?"

"For not being there Jude. I shouldn't have stayed at the cabin. Especially after Ryan."

"Tommy it's okay."

"No it's not. I abandoned you just because I couldn't imagine the pain you were going through and I knew I couldn't do anything to help you."

"Tommy, don't," she said quietly.

"I hate myself for just leaving you girl. I didn't even try to help you."

"Tommy you did help. Just by calling, e-mailing, and visiting when you could, that helped more than you know."

"But," Tommy started.

Jude turned around and placed a finger on his lips. "Shh, it doesn't matter anymore. It's over and done with."

"You're not mad at me?"

"No, I mean I was at first but not anymore. You did what you had to do and what you thought was right."


	36. Chapter 36

"But what I thought was right couldn't have been more wrong."

Jude gently took one of the blankets Tommy held and spread it out in the center of the roof. She sat down and motioned for him to come over. "So? Maybe it was wrong but now that you're here I'm fine."

Tommy eased himself down beside Jude, threw the other blanket over the both of them and wrapped his warm arms around her shivering body.

"But you would have been fine sooner."

"Tommy, would you just give it up already," she smiled.

Tommy sighed and nodded his head.

"Are you excited for tomorrow?" she asked.

"To be honest, not really."

"Why?"

"First off this is the start of my solo career. It's what I've always wanted and second you know they're going to ask questions about us."

"Tommy have you even glanced at any tabloids lately? We're always on the cover with corny headlines like 'Instant Star starry-eyed for Older Producer.' All you have to tell them is that we're completely platonic."

"I know, but we've never had to answer any questions before."

"Yeah well if you don't want to do it you should think how I feel. They're not exactly going to ask you what it's like to self-destruct," she said bitterly.

Tommy pulled her closer and she responded by resting her head on his chest. "You do realize it's almost four in the morning right?"

"Of course. It's the best time to be up here," she said pointing at the sunrise.

"I know why you like it up here so much."

"Why?"

"Because it's private and nobody knows about it. You can be anyone and do anything you want up here."

"Well yeah, tha'ts about it."

Tommy kissed Jude on the forehead. "I love behing here with you girl."

"So do I."

"Where's Tommy and Jude?" Sadie asked, walking from her bedroom. Her normally, perfectly in place, blonde hair was sticking up in all directions and she was wearing Kwest's t-shirt and a pair of his boxers.

"Up on the roof," he said, taking a sip of his coffee.

"How do you know that?"

"She always goes up there in the mornings."

"Oh."

"They'll come down eventually. I figured we should leave them alone for awhile. They have Under the Mic at 2:30."

"Are you sure leaving them up there is such a smart idea?"

"Sadie, they'll be fine. Tommy isn't going to do anything stupid and Jude wouldn't let him anyway."

"Okay, okay."

"Tommy?"

"Yeah?"

"Don't leave me again."

"Never," he said teresly as he brought her warm, slim body closer to his own.

They stayed in each other's arms for a few moments before Jude remembered they had to get ready for Under the Mic. She quickly glanced at Tommy's watch which told her it was a quarter to ten.  
"Tommy we have to go."

"What? Why?"

"Under the Mic ring a bell by any chance?"

"Must you remind me?"

"Come on Quincy."

Tommy followed Jude down the fire escape and into the apartment.

"Morning," she said out of breath.

"Morning," Kwest said snickering.

"What's so funny man?"

"Nothing," Kwest said.

Tommy gave him an odd look and shook his head.

"Jude can I talk to you for a minute?" Sadie asked.

"Uh yeah, sure," she said following Sadie.

Kwest gave Sadie a 'don't go there' look before she stalked off with Jude to her bedroom.

"Did you do anything with him last night?" she demanded.

"Wow Sadie, ya don't beat around the bush do ya?"

"Just answer the question."

"No. We were just talking. You don't need to go all parental on me."

"Well it's not as if anyone else does."

"Sadie I don't need you to tell me what to do."

"I just don't want to see you get hurt again."

"Tommy won't hurt me."

"He won't?" she asked sarcastically.

"Tommy is not the bad guy here."

"He's not? Could've fooled me."

"Sadie do you have to be like this? Tommy loves me, is that so hard to believe?"

'No, I know he's loved you since he met you but you've been hurt so much already."

"Getting hurt is a part of life Sadie, and I wouldn't even be here if it wasn't for him!"

"What?"

"I tried killing myself twice at the cabin and if Tommy hadn't stopped me I wouldn't be here."

"Oh," she simply said, looking at her younger sister.

"Tommy is the best guy I have ever met and I don't need you telling me what I can and cannot do with him!" she screamed.

"Jude," Tommy interrupted quietly.

"What?" she said a bit harshly.

"Calm down okay. I can see where Sadie's coming from."

"Your supposed to be on my side!"

"Hey I am. I just can see her side of it."

Sadie watched Tommy's body language when he came over to Jude. He gently took her hand and whispered a few things in her ear. She had to admit he'd been patient, kind and loving with Jude since Ryan. It frustrated her that he had left her so many times, but she could tell he regretted it.

"Sadie, I know you don't like Jude and I being together."

"Tommy, it's really none of my business. The overprotective big sister in my popped out."

"Don't worry about it," Tommy said.

"Your on in five minutes Jude," a set-producer yelled into the dressing room.

Jude quickly glanced in the mirror once more before she walked out. She was wearing a shorter jean skirt with a black tanktop and a cropped denim jacket.

"Everybody give a big round of applause for Jude Harrison!" the host announced.

Jude walked out, guitar in hand, to the stage and the appluading fans. She sat down on a black stool beside David Cortez, who was the new host of Under the Mic. Jude would say he was attractive. He was of Latina descent with bleached blonde hair, and dark brown eyes.

Jude shook his hand and they exhchanged pleasantries before the roar of the crowd died down.

"Well Jude it's nice _to_ see you back."

"It's really great to be back," Jude said enthusiastically.

"We all know about your tour getting cut short. Could you elaborate a bit?"

Tommy sat in the audience with his jaw clenched. He wanted to walk on stage and punch Cortez's face in.

"Well I hit a really low spot in my life. I'm not really sure what else I can tell you."

David did not look happy with her vague answer so he decided to pull out a direct question. "Well is it true that you had a drug addiction and a cutting problem."

"Jude paused for a moment. "I wouldn't call it a drug addiction but as much as I hate to admit it yes I had a problem. But like I said I was depressed and it was a very low point in my life."

Tommy smiled at Jude's quick response. He knew she could handle anything Cortez shot at her.

"What about the rumor that you were raped by your producer's brother?"

AUTHORS NOTE: _Okay, I doubt someone ona live tv show would actually ask that, but it works for my story so I used it lolz. Please review if you have time!_


	37. Chapter 37

AUTHORS NOTE: Okay guys I know this is one of my shortest chapters ever! But, I have to get some stuff done before I type anymore up. I'll prolly get another chapter up by later on this evening. So keep on the lookout for it, and review!

Jude's eyes widened and she quickly looked at Tommy. She bolted off the stage and Tommy quickly followed behind.

"H...how...how do they know," she stammered through sobs.

"I don't know girl," he said as he brought her close to his chest.

"Why would he ask that Tommy, why?" she sobbed.

"I don't know."

"Jude," Sadie, said, dragging Kwest behind her. "Are you alright?"

By this time Jude was hysterical and hyperventilating. Tommy quickly mouthed a few words to Sadie and ushered Jude out the exit door. "Jude you gotta calm down."

She tried to slow her breathing and her crying, but it was a futile attempt.

"Hey, look at me," Tommy said, holding her face and forcing her to look into his eyes. "Everything is going to be okay, but you need to calm down."

Jude gasped for air a few times and finally began to regain her composure. "I...I know."

Tommy took her in his arms again. "I'm so so sorry girl."

"Why would they do that Tommy? As if...as if things weren't already screwed up, now the whole world knows."

"Jude it doesn't matter. Don't let this set you back."

"How did they know?" she ignored his last comment.

"I honestly don't know Jude. I don't think Ryan would be stupid enough to go public with something like that but who knows."  
Tommy turned around when he heard the exit door slam and EJ and Georgia emerged from the building.

"Jude, go with EJ in the limo and wait, Tom, I want to talk to you now!"

Jude reluctantly followed EJ to the limo, leaving Tommy to deal with Georgia's wrath.

"What the hell is going on Quincy? You better tell me that Cortez was lying."

"As much as I wish he was, he wasn't."

"God," Georgia paced the parking lot.

Tommuy told the story from start to finish at Georgia's insistence.

"Why didn't she tell us? Moreover, why didn't you tell us?"

"She didn't want anyone's pity G, and I wasn't going to go against her wishes."

"Doesn't she realize she should have went to the doctor?"

"We tried telling her Georgia. It wasn't like we could force her to go."

"Go get in the limo. The rest of us will meet you at G Major."

"Okay," Tommy said as he ran towards the limo. He opened the door and saw a sleeping Jude lying on the leather seat, opposite EJ. "What did you do to her?"

"Nothing! She just fell asleep," EJ explained.

"Sure," he said as the car drove away.


	38. Chapter 38

AUTHORS NOTE: This is hilarious, I get more reviews on short posts than long ones lolz. This is another short one. Sorry guys, I was hopin' i'd get some inspiration with the backstage pass thingy tonight, but to be honest it kinda bit. I mean I love Alex's singing and everything, but I was hopin for a bit more interviewy type scene. Anyways, I'm gonna let ya go so you can read n review!

Jude was still sleeping when they arrived at G Major. EJ quickly exited the car and bolted up the cement steps of G Major. Tommy carefully picked Jude up and carried her to the black leather couch in his office. He then set off to find Georgia and the others. He saw that Kat and Jamie had also joined the group in the lobby.

"Please tell me that guy was lying," Kat said, holding Jamie's hand.

Tommy looked at Georgia and down at the floor. He simply shook his head.

Kat burst into tears and Jamie held her close.

"We need to throw something back at this," Georgia said.

"What? The girl was raped Georgia. We are not going to turn this into a PR scheme," Tommy said harshly.

"I never said we would Tom."

"I'm going to take her home and I don't want anyone from G Major or otherwise to comment on this to anyone," he ordered as he stalked back to his office.

Tommy sat beside the couch Jude was sleeping on. He held his guitar in one hand and a notepad laid beside him. He was trying his best to come up with a song, but after the day's events he was emotionally drained. Tommy got up to walk around and make himself at home since Kwest and Sadie told him they were going to stay at a hotel for the night.

He sauntered into the kitchen to make himself a cup of coffee and then paced around while the hot liquid was brewing.

"Got a cup for me?" a disheveled Jude said.

"Hey, your awake. Of course."

"Wanna tell me that today was just a dream?"

"I wish I could Jude."

"I guess, somehow I knew it was going to come out eventually. I just didn't think it would come out this way."

Tommy handed her a ceramic cup of black coffee. "I'm sorry Jude. I don't know how he found out."

"It doesn't really matter anymore Tommy. The whole world knows that Jude Harrison was raped by her producer's older brother," she said, her voice dripping with disdain.

Jude's outlook on things was beginning to scare Tommy. "Jude."

"No Tommy. I am perfectly fine," she said as she wlaked into the bathroom.

"Jude Elizabeth Harrison!" he yelled. "If you grab any of those pills in there..."

"You'll what?" she opened the door to face him. "What will you do almighty boybander," she taunted.

"Jude stop it."

"No! All I wanted was to have a normal life, sing music, but I got stock with this. My parents don't give a shit, I had a drug addiciton, I'm dating a boybander, I didn't ask for this Tommy.

The hurt look on Tommy's face didn't even register with Jude. She was on a rampage and nothing was going to stop her.

"Jude just knock it off. Things could be so much worse if you think about it."

"You don't know what it's like," she cried.

"You're right, I have no idea what it's like to be you," he said sarcastically. "Almost everything that's happened to you has happened to me. I got hooked on alcahol, I took pills, I was famous. I know what fame is like and I know what it can do to a person."

"This isn't about fame Tommy!"


	39. Chapter 39

"Then what's it about Jude? Enlighten me, if you will."

"How can I tell you when I'm not even sure."

After a few moments of silence Jude turned around and went back to her room.

A defeated Tommy sighed and retreated to his own room. He quickly stripped down to his foxers and slipped into bed. After a few hours of staring at the ceiling he fell asleep, and his alarm clock seemed to wake him up moments later.

The next few days leading to Jude's birthday were a whirlwind. Tabloid after tabloid had something about the disastrous Under the Mic session. Jude tried to blow everything off and act like she didn't care, but instead she began to push her friends and Tommy away.

The morning of her birthday she drove to the studio with Tommy, like usual. EJ grabbed her the instant she walked in the door.

"EJ what are you doing?" Jude whined.

"You need to get ready."

"EJ, the party doesn't start until 8 tonight. It's 9 in the morning!"

"EJ, leave Jude alone. There's plenty of time before the party."

EJ gave Georgia a cold look and stalked off in the other direction.

"Don't worry about her, she just wants everything to be perfect."

"It's one of my parties Georgia, I think she can forget about it being perfect."

"Jude everything will go fine. But, there is one thing I want to talk to you about."

"Yeah?"

"Tommy's really worried about you, we all are."

"I'm fine Georgia," Jude said irratably. "I just want to put it all behind me and move on. It's been a week since Under the Mic, and everythings just starting to die down."

"I can understand that Jude, but what about what you're doing to Tommy?"

Jude looked at her oddly. "What am I doing to Tommy?"

"Oh I don't know, ignoring him, getting mad at him for no reason, any of that ring a bell?"

Jude thought for a moment. Georgia did have a point, but it wasn't like Tommy got mad at her for any of it, and he knew she didn't mean it.

"Go talk to him, figure things out."

"There's nothing to figure out Georgia."

"Jude."

"Fine, I'll go."

Jude stalked off towards Tommy's office and knocked on the door.

"Come in," Tommy's charismatic voice said.

Jude slowly opened the door and walked in.

"Jude, hi."

"Hey. I Um, I came to say I'm sorry."

"For what?"

"For being so horrible to you this past week."

"Jude don't worry about it, I understand. Look, I have a surprise for you tonight after your party."

"A surprise?" Jude's eyes lit up. "What is it?"

Tommy wrapped his arms around her waist and kissed her forehead. "Now if I told you it wouldn't be a surprise anymore."

Jude pouted and looked up at Tommy with sad eyes. "Quincy you're no fun."

Tommy laughed and shooed Jude out the door. "You'll find out tonight. Not go home and wait for EJ and her specialists to get there to make you all pretty," Tommy mocked, knowing Jude's hatred for EJ's primping sessions.

"So not funny Quincy," she quickly gave him a peck on the lips and proceeded to exit G Major.


	40. Chapter 40

"Ow!" Jude yelped at Franco, the hairstylist.

"Vat am I doing?" he said with his thick accent.

"Jude stop whining. Your hair is going to look gorgeous," EJ gushed.

"Yeah, if there's any left on my head," she muttered under her breath.

Sadie heard the comment and stifled her laughter while Jude pouted like a three-year-old.

Two hours later Jude's hair and make-up was finally finished. Her hair was in a curly updo with fresh, white flowers twined into it. A bronzy shadow swept across her eyelids, with black eyeliner, and thick black mascara. A nude, almost clear lipgloss had also been carefully applied.

When the stylists work had been done, they left with EJ and let the sisters finish dressing.

"Jude, you look so pretty," Sadie said, watching her sister twirl around in front of the mirror.

"Thanks Sades. You look awesome too," Jude admired the strappy, white, babydoll dress. "Only you could pull something like that off."

Sadie smiled. "Thanks."

Jude looked out the window and saw the limo pull up, and Tommy and Kwest emerge from it.

"Well ready to go sister?" Jude asked.

"Course I am."

They made their way out the door and down the steps.

Both Tommy and Kwest's gazes were directly on the Harrison girls.

"Well boys, what do you think of the girl of the hour?" Sadie asked with a smile.

"Wow Jude. You look, you look amazing." Tommy said.

"You don't clean up too bad yourself Quincy," she said as she walked past him and stepped into the limo.

"The belle of the ball, everyone,Jude Harrison accompanied by Tom Quincy," Shay announced.

Roars of applause and bulb flashes rushed through Jude's system. She smiled and held on to Tommy. It was known information by now that the two were dating and they recieved a few cold glares as they descended the steps but most of the fans approved of their less than professional relationship.

She peered out in the crowd and saw many of her friends but what surprised her most was the apparent presence of her paretns.

"Tommy," she whispered as they kept walking.

"What?"

"My parents are here."

"What," he said as he watched the color drain from her already pale face. "I can get you out of here in ten seconds."

"No, just follow my lead." Jude reached over and planted a passionate kiss with obvious tongue action on Tommy. Lights from the camera bulbs flashed like mad.

"Whoa," Tommy said when they broke apart.

"Jude Elizabeth Harrison!" her Dad yelled.

"Oh do I know you?" she said sarcastically.

"Jude, honey, I missed," Victoria said, trying to wrap her arms around her daughter.

"Take your hands off me," Jude said in monotone.

"But honey."

"I'm not your anything anymore!"

"Jude! Do not talk to your mother like that!" her Dad scolded.

"She is not my Mother and you sure as hell are not my Father!"Jude yelled as she stormed off out into the alley.

"Jude, wait!" Tommy called after her.

"Stay away from my daughter Quincy," Stuart said.

"I believe she made it quite clear that she doesn't care what you want or think."

"Jude," Tommy said when he caught up with her in the alley. The same spot they'd been a year ago, same time, place, and day.

"I told Georgia one of my parties could never be perfect. They had to come tonight didn't they?"

"Jude, I'm sorry about tonight."

"Don't worry about itTommy, it's not your fault. Nobody could have known they would come tonight."

"Jude, do ya know that surprise I had for you?"

"Yeah."

"Well here's part of it," he grabbed a small, black, box out of his suit coat and and handed it to her.


	41. Chapter 41

AUTHORS NOTE: _Okay, I know it's taken me longer than usual to get this up but I've been super busy. I know you all probably wanted a longer chapter but this is all I have time to type up tonight. I promise a longer chapter tomorrow! Read and review please!_

_Thanks to all my faithful reviewers, especially; _**catch1star, tazitz, ****ticia-rockinmysoxoff, and annathefreakmonkey! **_Thanks for sticking with it for so long!_

Jude carefully took the box from Tommy's outstretched hand and opened it with the tenderest touch. A small silver band with a sparkling small diamond, inset accent was revealed.

"Oh Tommy, I, I don't know what to say."

"You don't have to say anything. It's not an engagement ring, it's a promise ring," he said as he took it out of the box and slipped it on her left ring finger. "I promise you, that I will never leave you and I will try my best to never hurt you again." Tommy said, knowing he couldn't truthfully promise to never hurt her. Things changed too fast, and uncontrolable things were bound to happen.

Jude tightly wrapped her arms around his neck. "Thank you TOmmy."

"Your welcome girl," he said as he hugged her close.

Jude stared and smiled at the beautiful silver ring on her finger.

'Do you like it?" Tommy asked.

"I love it Tommy."

"I'm glad, because that's only one surprise of the night."

Jude gaped at him speechless.

Tommy reached out his hand for Jude. "Ready to go back?"

"No, but I can't really ditch my own party."

"Let's go then."

Kwest was the first to greet them when they re-entered the building.

"Hey you guys. Jude, I'm really sorry. Georgia had your parents escorted out a little bit ago."

"Thanks Kwest."

"Anytimg. Happy Birthday Red."

"Not Red anymore," Jude joked.

"Very true." Kwest glanced down at Jude's hand and saw the silvery ring. "Uh Jude, why don't you wait up in the balcony, Tommy will be there in a sec."

"Alright," she said as she slowly made her way up the steps.

"Dude, did you just propose to her?"

"No! Man, it's a promise ring."

"Oh, well...never mind then. Get up there and I'll have Shay cue you."

Jude and Tommy descended the stairs once again. Sadie and Kwest stood at the bottom of the stairs, Shay was at the spinning table, Kat and Jamie were standing beside Shay, ans EJ, Georgia, and Darius stood in the corner.

_Time To Be Your 21 _smoothed over the speakers as the crowd cleared and Tommy and Jude took their place on the dance floor.

"Happy birthday girl."

Jude smiled and laid her head on Tommy's broad chest. "So when do I get my second surprise?"

"After the party. Be patient."

"I'm not patient Quincy!"  
"Too bad, that's your own problem," Tommy joked.

Jude made her rounds with Tommy securely by her side. She sugar-coated her voice when talking with the "biz" people and revealed her normal self with her friends.

At 11:58, Tommy pulled Jude into a corner. "Well girl, your birthday's almost over."

"Crazy isn't it?"

As the clock struck midnight Tommy leaned in and gave Jude a sweet passionate kiss. "I love you my Cinderella."

Jude blushed and looked at the floor.

"Ready for the next part of your birthday present?"

"Do you even have to ask?" Jude smiled.

They exited to G Major and walked to the familiar blue Viper. Jude got in and slammed the door.

"Hey, take it easy!" Tommy said, stroking the hood of the car before he got in.

"I swear you love this car more than me."

"Not quite."


	42. Chapter 42

They arrived at the apartment about ten minutes later.

"Come here," tommy told her.

"What are you doing Quincy?" Jude said, eyeing the black bandana he had in his hand. "Are we doing a special reprieve of BoyzAttack!"

"Very funny," Tommy said, wrapping the bandana securely around her eyes. "For your information the bandanas were white, not black."

"Oh, technicality after technicality with you."

"You know you love it."

"What are we doing anyway?"

"You'll find out."

"Tommy," she whined.

"Just follow me," he said, grabbing her hand and leading her up to the roof of the apartment. Tommy slowly untied her blindfold and told her to open her eyes.

"Oh wow Tommy. It's beautiful." she awed at the setting of the roof. Rose petals were scattered all over the floor and candles were lit.

"Do you like it?"   
"I love it Tommy. Thank you!" she turned around and hugged him.

"I'm glad you like it. Come here, I have another surprise for you."

"Another one? Tommy you really shouldn't have. The ring, this, it's more than enough."

"You don't even know what it is yet," Tommy said smiling mischeviously. He went over to the corner and grabbed a large box and brought it over to her.

She shot a flirtatious look at him before she tore at the pink wrapping paper. Tommy had a plastered grin on his face while she opened it.

"Oh my god!" Jude squealed as she saw what was beneath the paper. "I can't believe you did this!" she said as she pulled the sparkly red guitar out of the box.

"Do you know how much these cost?"

"Well considering I paid for it, yes I do," he chuckled.

"Tommy, you did way too much for me."

"No I didn't. You're special to me and I want to treat you like it."

"Thank you."

"Your welcome girl," he said as he took her in his arms. "What do you say we go back to the apartment. Kwest and Sadie won't be back until tomorrow afternoon."

"I don't know Tommy..."

"Listen, we won't do anything you don't want to."

Jude paused and looked up at him. His strong features, caring eyes, sensual lips, everything about him oozed sex appeal. "Okay."

He clasped her hand with his and they slowly made their way back to the apartment. They both went to their seperate rooms and quickly changed clothes. Jude wore a pair of black silk pajama bottoms and a white camisole. Tommy came out wearing a black t-shirt and a pair of boxers.

They started a movie and cuddled on the couch. Tommy's arm was protectively draped around her shoulders. He gently grazed his hand up and down Jude's arm and leaned in to kiss her. Jude returned the kiss with an equal amount of passion and the intensity in the room increased. Fire passed between the two of them which brought their bodies closer. Tommy's hand found it's way up Jude's shirt and tenderly caressed the small of her back. Fear poured over Jude and she pushed Tommy away.

"What's wrong?" Tommy asked.

"I can't Tommy. I'm sorry, but I can't."

"Hey, don't worry," he said in a soothing voice as he cupped her cheek with his hand. "It's okay."

"No it's not."

Tommy was filled with rage against his older brother. He had done this to Jude. He had put the fear of God in her about an act that could be so tender, so loving, so beautiful.

He took her in his arms and stroked her hair. Jude was silent, rigid, and distant. She was in her own mindset and Tommy knew, at this point, he couldn't bring her out of it.


	43. Chapter 43

AUTHORS NOTE: A bit longer chapter for you guys. I know my chapters have been pretty short and choppy lately, but I've been sooo busy! Once basketball and things are over I should be able to come up with some better material. Thanks for all your reviews, I love you guys! And keep em comin'!

Two months after her 17th birthday, Tommy's and her own albums were released, both going platinum in under a week and double platinum within a month. There were both on top of the world at this point and talks of a world tour had been taking place.

Tommy, Jude, and Kwest were in the studio late one Friday night, which wasn't any different from any of the other Friday's they had worked late. Kwest was teaching Jude how to mix some new beats while Tommy was working out the melody for his song.

"Jude you can go home if you want," Tommy ventured.

Jude held up the styrofoam cup which contained her double mocha latte. "I have at least a couple hours left with the help of my friend here."

Tommy shook his head and smiled at her.

"Okay Jude, your turn. Let's see what you can come up with," Kwest said, backing away from the sound board.

Jude moved a few buttons here and a few there and in no time she had a pretty good backing track for a beginner.

"Jeez you're going to be taking my job soon," Kwest joked.

"Yeah, sure," Jude said as she hit the stop button.

"Wait, put that back on," Tommy said as he walked into the sound booth and put his headphones on.

Jude obeyed Tommy's request and listened to him vocalize to the backing track.

"I think we have a song," Kwest turned to Jude.

"I think so too," Jude smiled into space.

The next day Tommy finished recording the song and took Jude out for a small celebratory lunch. He drove to the outskirts of town and stopped at what looked like an old Italian villa. It was called Sergio's and was known for it's perfect, quaint setting and delicious food. It was also known for it's above average celebrity attendance.

"Well Quincy, you'll be 24 in a month. Are you excited?"

"To be honest, not really. Everyone's expecting a huge part and I don't want one."

"Then what do you want?" she asked as their food was set before them.

"A weekend, alone, with you...in Hawaii," he said with a sly smile.

"Hawaii?"

"Yeah. G Major has a small house by the beach in Maui.

Thoughts of Maui, Tommy, and her alone scared her. She wanted to be with Tommy, but everytime it got to heated, she pulled back.

"Please," he pleaded with puppy dog eyes.

"Okay I'll go, but I have to get it okayed with Georgia."

"Already done," Tommy said with a smile.

"You knew I'd eventually say yes didn't you?"

"Of course."

Jude shook her head and looked up at Tommy. "Has Darius mentioned anything about the tour?" she asked as she took a sip of her ice water.

"A little. They're trying to find a few sponsors for it before they finalize everything."

"What if I said I didn't want to go on tour?"

"What? Why not? This is a great opportunity for us Jude."

"I know but I don't want a repeat of what happened last time."

"It won't be, I'll be with you the entire time."

"I know, but it just scares me. It probably sounds really dumb."

"Not dumb, you're just paranoid but that makes perfect sense."

"Do you want to go on the tour?"

"Yeah, I mean it would be my first solo tour, without BoyzAttack!. Weren't you excited for your tour?"

"Yeah, until I realized you weren't coming back and you wouldn't be there to experience it with me," she said with downcast eyes.

"And that was one of the biggest mistakes of my life Jude."

"Tommy, I don't want to get into this, at least not here, not now."

"And that's fine Jude. I never said we had to."

"I know."

They finished eating and drove back to G Major in silence. Jude had so many thoughts floating around in her head that she couldn't keep them straight.

The only thing on Tommy's mind was Jude. He didn't want the tour to screw everything up that they had built. It had taken over a year for them to get where they were now. Tommy knew they couldn't last if they were broken apart again.

Jude was sitting in the lobby of G Major when her cell phone rang.

"Hello."

"Hey Shorty. What's up?"

"Nothing much Shay, what about you?"

"Just driving around Toronto."

"Your in town?"

"Yeah, just got in. Uncle D wants me to set down a few tracks at G Major."

"I thought you signed with a company in L.A.?"

"I did, but I signed a freelance contract."

"Jeez, big time music artist."

"Hey I was big even before you could play guitar."

"Big talker," Jude laughed.

"You know it. Is Tom there?"

"Yeah, him and Kwest are in Studio B."

"Okay, well I'll probably be there in about ten minutes."

"Alright, see you soon."

Jude walked into Studio B and announced that Shay was coming.

"Great, Mr. Drama Queen himself," Tommy groaned.

"Hey, Shay's grown up and he's one of my friends."

"This is Shay Shay we're talking about Jude. Ya know, the one that cheated on you with Eden."

"I know what he did, but that's in the past," she said. "Your just jealous that he was my first boyfriend."

"Damn right I'm jealous. You considered him as your first kiss."

"Yeah, so? It's not like you were my first kiss."

"Oh I wasn't?"

"No. That time we kissed in front of my house, yeah need I remind you that you didn't kiss me back."

"Well that's different now," Tommy said, placing a kiss on her red lips.

"Guys," Kwest groaned. "Sadie and I don't make out in front of you."

"We're not making out Kwest," Jude laughed and walked out to the lobby.

"Hey Shorty!" Shay picked her up and spun her around.

Jude let out a girlish shriek and hugged Shay.

"It's been awhile."

"Way too long," Jude said as Shay placed her back on the ground. "What no entourage?" Jude joked.

"Not this time. So is your boy ready to work?"

"Depends, go ask him."

"Shay, these lyrics stink," Tommy voiced his honest opinion while he read the sheet of paper Shay had given him.

"Nothing like being blunt huh Quincy?" Shay asked with a disgusted look on his face.

"Well I'm just being honest Shay. Where'd you get this crap anyway? This isn't your stuff."

"Portia wrote it."

"Portia?" Tommy scoffed. "As in my ex-wife Portia? Man, she couldn't write a song if her life depended on it."

"Thank you Captain Obvious," Shay said.

"Do you want to record this and have Darius on your ass or come up with something for tomorrow that's actually worth tape space?"

"I'll come back tomorrow," Shay said as he walked out of the studio.

"Tommy why do you have to be like that?"

"Like what?"

"Like that with Shay."

"I wasn't any harder on him than I am with my other artists."

"Tha'ts bull Tommy and you know it."

Tommy smirked and shook his head.

Jude glared at him and started to walk out of the studio. "Ya know what, it's just like you Quincy to take the arrogant ass card isn't it?"

"Great," Tommy said to himself as he followed her.

"Jude, wait up."

"What?" she groaned.

"I'm sorry about how I treated Shay. Forgive me?"

"I'll think about it."

"You're so stubborn."

"Not as bad as you."

"Come on, we have a meeting to go to."


	44. Chapter 44

Jude followed Tommy into Georgia's main office and sat down at the large round table. Kwest, Darius, Georgia, EJ, as well as herself and Tommy were in the room.

"You know the talks of a double world tour have been in the works," Georgia said.

Tommy smiled, glanced at Jude, and nodded his head.

"Georgia tell them the point of this meeting already," Darius said impatiently.

"One week after Tommy's birthday you will go on a world tour that will last four months," she said in a grim voice.

"What's wrong?" Jude asked. "Isn't this a good thing?"

"Normally yes, but we're talking about two seperate world tours, one for you, and one for Tommy."

"No!" Jude stood up. "I won't do it."

"I'm going to try to switch it Jude, but my hands are tied. After Darius became a partner, G Major became part of D Records, which became part of an even larger company. I have little to no say in this."

"You two," Jude motioned toward Georgia and Darius. "Better fix this or I quit!" she stormed out of the room.

"What is wrong with that girl of yours? Can't you keep her under control?"

"Can't you have a bit of a heart? D, don't you remember what happened on her last tour, it was a disaster."

"Well it wasn't great for her, but it got great reviews."

"Who cares about reviews and money and PR when Jude could have died? She'll never go for this, never."

"We're trying Tommy," Georgia said quietly.

"You two need to figure something out. I'm going to find Jude."

Georgia simply nodded and Tommy exited the room and set off to find Jude. He checked Studio A and B before he found her in a corner in Studio C.

"Hey," he said quietly, leaning on the doorway.

"I can't do it Tommy. Not by myself, not without you."

"I know and you won't have to."

She stood up and lightly grazed her fingers on the weathered sound board. "Things should be so much easier now."

"You're right, they should be, but that doesn't mean they will be. Look, how about we leave for Maui a big early."

"A bit? Tommy it's a month before your birthday."

"So?" he said as he sauntered over to her and rested his hands around her waist. "We could get away, have some fun."

"Tommy, I don't know if it's such a good idea."

"Please," Tommy begged with his silver blue eyes.

"You really have that whole begging thing down don't ya Quincy?"

"Does that mean you'll go?"

"God, this isn't even fair. You know that I can't say no to you."

"Thank you baby," Tommy said as he hugged her.

"Don't say thank you yet."

The next two days were very hectic for everyone. Jude was busy finishing a few things at the studio, packing, and shopping with Sadie for a new 'beach friendly' wardrobe. Tommy was also finishing some projects up and planning their trip. Kwest and Sadie were just innocent bystanders who had to deal with the very crazy lives of Tommy and Jude: the couple.

Kwest and Sadie drove the two to the airport on Wednesday morning.

"Girl, what are you all bringing? They do have stores in Hawaii ya know," Tommy said as he lugged the suitcases into the airport.

"Hey don't blame me, Sadie was the one who helped me pack."

"Figures," Kwest muttered under his breath.

"What was that honey?" Sadie asked in her sweet but venomous voice.

"Oh nothing," Kwest said in his sugar-coated voice.

They said their goodbyes and boarded the plance without realizing someone nearby, was watching their every move.

"I'll get you Tom Quincy. If it's the last thing I do."

Authors Note: Okay, yeah the last line was totally cliche but hey it worked lol. I'm going to try really hard to get another chapter up tonight, but if I don't you'll get one for sure tomorrow night. R/R please!


	45. Chapter 45

Authors Note: This is a very short chapter, but I'm trying to work my way up to some major drama. I'm happy to say that I am almost finished with this fanfic! Eight chapters left at the most. I'm hoping for more like 4, but hey. Anyways, read and review please!

"Jude," Tommy shook his sleeping girlfriend. "Look out the window."

"No way. You know I hate heights and planes the way it is."

"Then why did I give you the window seat."

"I believe you said it was to get over my fears."

"Ah, I remember," he said as he kissed her forehead and reached for her hand. "We're almost there."

"Thank god, because I need to step on solid ground soon."

"You're such a drama queen."

Jude's mouth gaped open. "Quincy you did not just call me a drama queen."

"You should check your hearing cause I just did."

"You're horrible."

"Like your any better."

They landed at Maui International Airport and Jude and Tommy exited the plane. A limo was waiting to take them to the beach house.

They threw their bags in the large spacious house and Tommy gave Jude a quick tour. There were 7 bedrooms and four baths in all.

"You left out the part about this place being a mansion!" Jude exclaimed.

"Hey, it's never been this big until Darius got ahold of it. It used to be a small one bedroom house and now, it's this."

"I'm not complaining I guess."

"Good. So what do you want to do?"

"I don't know. I've never been to Hawaii before. I've never been out of Canada before."

"For an artist you'd think you would have gotten out just a bit more," Tommy joked.

"Very funny Quincy. Now, what's there to do around here?"

"Well considering it's only 2 in the afternoon, we could go surfing, get some lunch, shopping," his tone turned dismal with the last word.

"I'd probably kill myself if we went surfing. Let's go grab some lunch."

"Fine by me. I'm starving."

"This is so good," Jude raved as she took a bite of her pork and mango salsa.

"I told you Hawaiian food was the best."

Jude laughed and looked up at him. "So any ideas for tonight?"

"Check out the club scene, do a little swimming maybe," Tommy said.

"You know I'm not much for the club scene."

"Okay, then we'll just go swimming."

"Walk on the beach?"

"Sure."


	46. Chapter 46

Later that night Tommy had persuaded Jude to go to a few clubs before they walked on the beach.

"Glad you came?" he asked as they intertwined hands and walked barefoot on the beach.

"Yeah," she said timidly.

"What's wrong?" Tommy asked, seeing her body language change.

"Nothing's wrong."

"Liar."

"It's nothing."

"Okay," Tommy said, not totally believing her.

"Do you ever think about your Dad?" she asked.

"Jude, I don't think we should talk about this."

She sat down and stuck her feet in the ocean water. "Why not?"

"Because I don't want to.

"Please."

Tommy sighed and sat down beside her. "Yeah, I do, but none of that really matters Jude. He hates me for what happened and that will never change."

"But it wasn't your fault."

"I know, but he thinks it is, and honestly I believe it was my fault too."

"But you can't think like that."

"I know I shouldn't but I do." Tommy paused for a moment before opening his mouth to speak. "What about you, do you ever think about what...what Ryan did?"

Jude looked out into the crystal blue ocean, waves gently crashing against the rocks. "All the time. Sometimes I'll be sleeping, and I'll just wake up and it'll feel like he's there in the room. Then I can't get back to sleep and I end up either walking around or watching tv."

"I"m sorry Jude."

"Tommy it's not your fault. I've come to terms I guess with it. It happened, there's nothing I can do to change it. Sometimes I wish I would have pressed charges because then maybe there wouldn't be this constant fear that he'll come back. I can be at the studio, at the apartment, getting homework from my tutor, I can be doing anything and it'll feel like he's behind me or somewhere watching me."

"I can't even imagine what it's like to be you Jude."

"It's not as hard as everyone thinks. Sure I have a constant fear he'll come back, and sometimes I think it would be so much easier if I still took the pills and cut because maybe it would take some of the pain away, but if I had to go through everything I did at the cabin again, I wouldn't even think of doing either of them again. The pain isn't so bad I guess, because it shows that I can still feel despite everything that's happened."

"Jude, you are the strongest, smartest, prettiest girl I know. Not many girls, let alone guys, could go through what you have, and not be crazy. Everything you've been through has made you...us stronger. And while I can't share everything that's happened with you, I can at least be there for you for most of it," he leaned over and kissed her.

Jude smiled as the kiss ended. "I'm glad you think so highly of me."

"You know I do."

She stood up and grabbed his hand and led him up to the house.

"What are we doing?" Tommy asked.

She pulled him close and placed her lips upon his.

"Jude," Tommy said quietly.

"I want to do this."

"If you truly want to, we can, but if you have any doubts, and second thoughts then we shouldn't. I don't want to rush this Jude."

"We're not rushing anything Tommy. We've known each other for almost three years, and in that three years there's always been the spark of romantic feelings. I trust you."

"Are you sure?"  
"Yes."

Tommy reluctantly took her hand and led her to the bed. They laid side by side and he stared into his sparkling green eyes for a few moments before he gently kissed her lips. His skillful tongue slowly parted her lips and pure, raw passion flickered between their bodies. Tommy slowly began to take her shirt off and he felt her muscles tense up. He slowly ran his hands and looked into her young, scared eyes.

"I won't hurt you Jude, I promise, but we don't have to do this."

"I'm fine, just a little nervous I guess."

"Don't be, I'll never hurt you."

Jude nodded and felt Tommy's lips once again crapsh upon hers, his hands wandering on her bare flesh. He gently slipped her tanktop off and soon they were both lying next to each other, skin against skin. Tommy's rouch, but gentle hands explored every inch of her body. He kissed the scars upon her wrists and murmured sweet nothings in her ear.

They spend the rest of the night in bed, tangled in each others arms.

"I love you," Tommy said quietly, brushing a tendril of caramel colored hair away from her face.

Jude smiled and curled closer to Tommy's bare chest.

"I love you too."

Authors Note: Okay, a bit of a longer chapter for you guys. I hope you guys liked it, but this was the first time I've ever writeen a "bedroom" scene lolz, so if it sucks that's why. I tried though. Hope you guy's like it, and please read and review!


	47. Chapter 47

The next morning Jude woke up and took a shower and was promptly joined by Tommy.  
"Tommy," she whined. "I have to get ready."

"We're on vacation," he said as he tickled her.

"Out!" she yelled.

"Fine, fine," Tommy said as he stepped out of the shower and proceeded to get dressed.

"Not much of a morning person are we?" Tommy looked up from the paper he was reading, as Jude entered the kitchen.

"I like my quiet time Quincy."

"Sure."

"So what's on the schedule for today?"

"Do we always have to have a schedule?"

"Well no, I guess not."

"Okay then, let's go swimming on the private beach."

"Ooo, there's a private beach!"

"Yes there's a private beach. Go get ready."

Jude went to change into her new red halter top bikini, that once again Sadie had picked out.

They walked to the empty beach and dove into the crystal blue waves. Tommy was holding Jude and splashing her, when he heard a noise. He grabbed her hand and drug her out of the water.

"Tommy what's going on?"

"Somebody's here."

"So?"

"Jude," Tommy trailed off.

"Congratulations brother. You're not quite as dumb as I thought you were."

"What are you doing here?" Tommy demanded.

"Came to finish what I started," he said, pointing at Jude.

"Don't even think about hurting her or even getting near her."

"What are you going to do little Tommy Q? Nobody's around."

Jude was filled with fear at the mere sight of Ryan but once she looked down and saw that Ryan had a gun, fear took on a whole new meaning with her. "Tommy," she whispered. "We have to get out of here."

"Leaving so soon Jude? I don't think so," he said as he raised the gun and aimed at her.

Tommy dove in front of her and the bullet hit him squarely in the chest. He fell with a loud thud to the ground and Ryan made a run for it.

"Tommy!" Jude screamed as she fell down beside him. His body was limp, but she could still see his sparkling blue eyes. She lifted his head and cradled his body to her chest.

"Are you okay?" he rasped.

"I'm fine," Jude said through tears.

"Don't cry girl. I'll be fine," he said in a mere whisper.

Jude watched him lose conciousness and pressed her hands against the bullet wound. He was covered in blood and she knew she couldn't leave him.

"Help! Somebody please help me!" she sobbed.

An island local heard her cries and rushed over to the two figures. He saw a young, attractive girl, holding a man. They were both covered in blooc and he quickly grabbed his cell phone to call an ambulance.

Jude was sitting quietly in the waiting room. Tommy was in surgery and she didn't know what was going on. A doctor had come out of the operating room earlier to tell her what was happening, but she hadn't processed a word he had said.

She was all alone, in a hospital, in a strange land, just grasping at straws. Tommy had to be okay.

She reached for her cell phone when she felt it vibrate against her leg.

"Hello," she said in a voice that wasn't hers.

"Jude, we heard what happened. We're on our way," Kwest said.

"Good," she said, trying not to let herself cry.

"Porita is already in Hawaii. I called her and she's on her way to the hospital. How is he?"

"I, I don't know."

"We'll be there in a few hours. Try to get some sleep."

Jude turned her phone off and looked at her watch. It was already 8:00 p.m. and Jude hadn't eaten or slept since early this morning. She curled up on a chair and closed her eyes but all she saw were images of Ryan and Tommy covered in blood. A soft voice brought her out of her day dream.

"Jude!" Portia called, coming over to hug her. "I am so sorry."

The floodgates opened and Jude started to sob. Portia kept quiet and simply held the young girl.

Kwest and Sadie arrived later that night. Jude was bombarded by hugs and words of comfort. She felt like crying but she couldn't. The tears just wouldn't come.

She recieved the okay to go and see Tommy early the next morning. She slowly walked down the hospital corridors, to the intensive care unit. She saw Tommy's pale, ashen body through the window. She took a deep breath and entered the room. He was hooked up to a ventilator and had four differend IV tubes hooked into his arm. Tears ran down her cheeks as she looked at his helpless figure. She pulled a chair up beside the bed a took hold of his cold hand. She gently placed a soft kiss on it.

"I love you so much Tommy."

Authors Note: Okay, now that I've probably pissed off all my loyal readers lolz. Hopefully you don't all hate how I did this, but hey if you do, let me know. Not that I'm going to change it, I just want to know what you think. No flames please!


	48. Chapter 48

Jude didn't notice the nurse walk in until she introduced herself. Jude looked up and the nurse gave her a look full of sympathy.

"I'm Leila," the nurse said softly as she walked over to Tommy.

"I'm Jude. Wh...why does he make those noise?" she timidly asked as a weak groan was emitted from Tommy's body.

"He's probably in pain," she said as she upped the dosage of morphine on the IV pole.

"Oh. Can you help him?"

"I increased his morphine intake. Did the doctor ever tell you what's going on?"

Jude shook her head.

"The bullet grazed his heart and it's lodged in his spinal chord," she said grimly, watching Jude's face turn a pale shade of green.

"So he could be paralyzed?"

The nurse nodded and proceeded to take Tommy's vitals. "Jude, I'm going to be quite frank with you. This is going to sound harsh and cruel, but I'm going to tell you what the doctor's won't. It's very unlikely Tommy will ever wake up, and if he does he probably won't make a full recovery."

"No," she murmured quietly.

"I wish I didn't have to tell you this, but I know the doctors won't and you need to know. You can't have false hope. I'm not saying he'll never wake up and I'm not saying that he won't get better, it's just very unlikely."

"Thank you," Jude said as she squeezed his hand again.

The nurse finished her duties and stepped out of the room, leaving Jude alone with Tommy.

She brought his cold hand up to her mouth and gently kissed it. She couldn't lose Tommy, not now, not ever. Tears sliped down her cheeks and her heart broke in two. She gently brushed a few locks of hair out of his closed eyes and smiled. Her gentle, loving Tommy was helpless all because of his brother.

She must have fallen asleep at some point because she looked up and saw a tall man standing on the opposite side of the bed. He had dark hair with a few gray streaks. The shimmering blue eyes told Jude who this man was.

"Hello," he said gruffly.

"Hi, I'm Jude Harrison."

"I know who you are."

"Oh."

"Jack Quincy."

"Tommy's father."

"And Ryan's."

"Ryan shot your son."

"I won't deny what he did, but he did it because of some stupid girl."

Jude was taken aback by Jack Quincy's statement. She was about to make a nasty retort when Kwest came in.

"I see you've met each other."

"Unfortunately," Jude said.

"Uh, Jude why don't you come with me."

"No, I want to stay with Tommy."

"Jude, now."

Jude looked at Kwest, Jack, and then Tommy. She gently bent over to kiss Tommy's forehead before leaving.

"Such a loving father," Jude said through clenched teeth, when they exited the room.

"Jack never was one to show his emotions, even before the fire."

"His son is dying! Now you tell me why you wouldn't show any emotion what-so-ever, and instead make snide comments to his girlfriend!"

"Tommy's not dying Jude," Kwest said.

"Yes, he is," Jude said.

"What?"

"Yeah," she said, a wave of emotion coming over her.

Kwest wrapped his arms around her and let himself cry. Even though crying wasn't the "manly" thing to do, he didn't even care anymore.

Jude wiped her eyes and pulled away from Kwest, noticing a glassy look on his face. He was exactly like Tommy when it came to masking their emotions. She couldn't read Kwest any better than she could Tommy. She frowned and turned around when she heard a voice.

"Oh honey," a woman in her mid to late 60's said as she pulled Jude into a hug.

Jude gave Kwest a help me look as she awkwardly accepted the hug.

"Hello Mr. Quincy," Kwest greeted the man that came with the lady. They shook hands for a moment before the man spoke.

"Hello Kwest. It's been awhile, how've you been son?"

"I've been better," he said.

"Oh Kwest. I can't believe this happened to Tommy," the woman said, releasing Jude to hug Kwest.

"So you're the Jude Harrison my grandson in always talking about when he calls us," the man said, shaking her hand. "You'll have to excues my wife, she's a bit overzealous in emotional situations like these."

Jude half smiled and nodded. She already liked the old man, she just wished they had met under better circumstances. "It's fine really. "

"Tommy's told us a lot about you," the woman said.

"Good I hope."

"Of course my dear girl. He said you were the prettiest girl on earth, with the voice of an angel.

Jude smiled absentmindedly. "Tommy's good at stretching the truth."

"Well we've heard you're voice on your CD and while it's no music from my time, it's pretty good," Mr Quincy said.

"And you're a very beautiful woman," Mrs. Quincy added.

"Thank you."

"Jude!" Leila called. "Tommy opened his eyes."


	49. Chapter 49

AUTHORS NOTE:

Okay guys, I'm gonna warn you, this chapter sucks lol and it's short, but for now it's all I got so you're gonna have to make do. R/R please!

A huge relief soared over her body and she quickly excused herself from Tommy's grandparents.

"Tommy," she said, bursting into the room.

He didn't move but she could see his eyes open and close. She walked closer to him and held his hand, regardless of his father's presence. His eyes were darting around the room like a scared little boy's and he couldn't speak because of the ventilator. Jude noticed the panic in his body and started to talk to him to calm him down.

"Hey Tommy," she said soothingly as she grazed her thumb back and forth across her hand. "It's Jude."

Tommy looked over and saw a man who looked like his father but it couldn't be. His eyes grew wide, he tried to talk but nothing came out. He tried to move, but nothing cooperated.

Jude saw Tommy's eyes, wild with fear. "Shh, it'll be okay, just calm down."

"I want you to get away from my son!" Jack's voice bellowed. He had watched enough of this pitiful act.

"Excuse me?" Jude looked up.

"I want you to leave this room now!"

"No!" she yelled back.

Kwest and Tommy's grandparents heard Jude and Jack yelling at each other. Kwest rushed in with the elder Quincy's close behind.

"Jack Quincy," Jessica Quincy yelled. "I am ashamed to call you my son! First you abandon Tommy and now that you're back, you're yelling at his girlfriend who obviously loves him."

"Mom stay out of this!"

"No! You never cared about your wife in the first place but when she died you laid all the blame on Tom because you couldn't blame his mother for everything anymore!"

Jude felt Tommy squeeze her hand and looked at her with sad eyes. Her heart went out to him. She knew it had to be hard, hearing everyone talk about you and not being able to do anything about it.

Leila entered the room and took a firm stance. "I want everyone out of here! You're disturbing my patient!"

Jack sneered at Jude before he retreated from the room. Jessica walked over to her grandson and Jude saw his eyes light up instantly at the site of her. Jude guessed Tommy was very close with his grandparents and she stepped out of the room to give them some privacy. Kwest followed behind and found Sadie in the waiting room.

"What's going on?" she asked, a sense of panic in her voice.

"He's awake." Jude said.

"That's great!" Sadie said, hugging her younger sister.


	50. Chapter 50

**Authors Note: So sorry it took so long to get another chapter up! It's been crazy busy around here as usual.**

"Yeah," Jude said quietly. "He um, he can't move or talk for that matter."

"Oh," Sadie said quietly.

The next few days were whirlwinds for Jude. She would sit with Tommy and talk and sing to him while he stared into space. At times she wondered if he truly did understand what was going on. Sadie would bring her a change of clothes every evening and she usually took showers in the special family facility. Every few days she would go back to the hotel and grab a few books or a new lyric book.

During this time Jude and Leila became good friends. Leila would explain all the complicated medical terms the doctors used and usually kept her company while Tommy was sleeping. They shared secrets and acted like they'd been best friends since Kindergarten. Jude learned that Leila was a single mother of 23 and her little girl was named Autumn.

The doctor assumed Tommy was well enough to remove the ventilator and attempted to pull the breathing tube out. As soon as it was disconnected, Tommy was left gasping for oxygen. It pained Jude to see Tommy like that, laying there, fighting for every breath. He had always been so strong and had always watched out for her, now the roles had switched.

Shay had called Jude and sent a few cards while Portia never seemed to leave the hospital ward. She had began to wear on Jude's nerves and Kwest and Sadie had both taken the hint that Jude did not like Portia. Kwest tried to divert Jude while Portia was visiting but it didn't seem to work too often.

Portia insisted that everyone had to leave the room so she could be alone with Tommy. Once Jude heard this she stormed into the room and was about to slap Tommy's ex before Kwest grabbed her arm and pulled her out of the room.

"What the hell are you doing Kwest?"

"Saving Tommy from viewing a catfight between his ex-wife and his current girlfriend."

"She is such a bitch! No wonder why Tommy divorced her."

"You left that comment wide open, but I'm not even going to comment," Kwest said with a smile.

"Who does she think she is Kwest? She kicked his grandparents out of his room. Seriously, what is she? God?"

"You know what Darius is like, Portia tends to be a female version."

"Just what the world needs," she said sarcastically.

"I'm not going to debate on that one."

"Keep her away from me or her pretty little face won't be so pretty anymore."

"Gotcha chief," Kwest mock saluted.

"Very funny. Tommy's grandparents and I are going to head back to the hotel. I need to take a shower longer than five minutes and grab a few books. Watch him for me?"

"Of course," Kwest hugged her. "Do me a favor and relax a little. Tommy'll be fine."

"I'll try but I won't make any promises," she said as she walked away to find Jessica and Andrew Quincy.

"Hello honey," Jessica greeted her with a hug.

"Hey. I'm sorry about Portia."

"She always was a demanding woman. You're much better suited for Tommy," Jessica said.

"Thanks. Do you want to run back to the hotel now?"

"That sounds good," Andrew said. "We'll take our rental car."

Once that arrived at the hotel Jude quickly shed her clothes and jumped into the steaming shower. She had just rinsed her hair when the phone rang. She groaned and quickly wrapped a towel around her body while proceeding to the living room.

"Hello."

"Jude, it's Leila."

"Hey, I thought you were off duty tonight."

"I was."

"What do you mean was? What's wrong?"

"Tommy was sitting up, without the ventilator, talking to Portia and all of a sudden he went into cardiac arrest."

"What? He was talking? And nobody called me?"

"Jude he went into cardiac arrest before anyone could. He got maybe four words out."

"Is he okay?"

"There's a significant amount of brain damage. The brain was deprived of oxygen for too long."

"What are you saying?"

"He's on life support."

Jude started shaking as the phone clattered to the floor. She sunk to the floor, succumbing into a ball of tears.

**Okay now that everyone wants to kill me now...go read and review:P**


	51. Chapter 51

Her body shook as she sobbed. She forgot that Leila was on the phone and thoughts ran through her head. "He talked to Portia, but not me. I'm slowly losing him."

"Jude?" Andrew Quincy knocked on the door as he opened it. He saw a towel-clad Jude lying in a heap on the floor, head in her hands. "Jude, what's wrong?"

"T, Tommy, he's on, he's on life support."

"Oh God," he said.

He left the room and brought his wife back to help Jude get dressed. They then left for the hospital.

The car hadn't completely stopped before Jude jumped out and ran through the sliding doors. SHe took the elevator up to the ICU and rushed to find Leila.

"Leila!" she yelled down the hall.

"Jude."

"What happened?" she asked, holding back tears.

"We're not completely sure Jude. He was tugging at the ventilator tube so the doctor removed it. He was fine, breathing on his own, sitting up, talking to Portia and Kwest. Kwest left the room for a few minutes and he went into cardiac arrest."

"I'm going to kill her!" Jude yelled as she stalked into the waiting room. She saw Portia sitting beside Shay. "What did you do to him?" she yelled.

"What are you talking about Jude?"

Tears were streaming down Jude's face as she walked over to Portia. "What did you do to Tommy?"

Portia stood up and faced Jude. "I didn't do anything."

"Bullshit," Jude said as her hand connected with the side of Portia's face.

"Okay, hold up Shorty," Shay said as he picked her up and threw her over his broad shoulders.

"Put me down!"

"Are you crazy?" he said, taking her into a secluded family room.

"You're not her bodyguard!"

"You're right," Shay said as he put her down and closed the door behind him. "I'm not, but I don't want to see you go to jail for murder either."

"So?"

"Jude, you were ready to rip her to shreds."

"And your point is?" she said, wiping her eyes.

"It's not her fault."

Tears ran down her pale face yet again, as she looked at Shay. "I might never hear his voice again Shay."

He looked at her with sad eyes and pulled her against his chest.

"Shay I love him."

"I know you do Shorty. You always have."

"I was so stupid Shay. If I hadn't told Tommy about what Ryan did, maybe he wouldn't be in a hospital hooked to a bunch of tubes. It's all my fault."

"Shh, don't even say that. You know it's not true."

"It isn't? Because right now, if I look back, Tommy could still be alive."

"You don't know that Jude."

There was an awkward silence and Jude pulled away and turned towards the door. "I should go see Tommy."

"Okay. Try to stay away from Portia."

"I'll try. Thanks Shay," she said as she walked out the door toward Tommy's room.

"Anytime Shorty, anytime," he said to himself.


	52. Chapter 52

Jude took a deep breath before she walked into Tommy's room. Not a tear fell from her already swollen eyes, nor did she make a sound. She watched the steady, electronic, rise and fall of his chest. She counted three seconds between each automated breath.

"Here again?" Jack Quincy asked.

"I don't blame you for being mad at me," Jack said. "I had no right to say the things I did. Tommy's relationship with me has always been complicated."

"I know."

"You really must be special if he told you." A few tears slid down his face. "I'm really sorry everything my other son has done to you. It's mostly my fault."

Jude was surprised at this new, sensitive Jack Quincy. He reminded him of Tommy in a certain way. "I'm sure it's not."

Jack disregarded her statement and went on talking as he stared at his lifeless son. "The doctors want to take him off life support."

"No."

"Jude, the decision is mine but I can't make it, not after everything I've done to him. I signed my rights away. Although he's not a minor, he's not married, and I'm a blood relative but I can't do it."

"Well then who will?"

"I signed the decision over to you."

"You what?"

"You're the closest one to him Jude."

"I can't."

"Yes you can Jude."

"But, Mr. Quincy..." Jude was cut off.

"It's not fair for me to do it Jude."

Jude nodded and left the room. She started to pace the halls and proceeded to follow the stairs up to the roof. It was early November, and even though it was Hawaii, it was chilly and raining, but she didn't care. She leaned on the railing and let the rain fall on her, soaking her clothes.

"Here," a young man said, handing her his coat.

"Oh, uh thanks," she said quietly.

"What are you doing up here anyway?" he asked, leaning on the railing beside her.

"Nothing, and I could ask you the same question."

He ignored her statement and said, "A pretty girl doesn't come on the roof when it's raining out, for nothing."

She smiled absentmindedly and looked out at the cars on the freeway, not really paying attention to her company. "Nothing you have time to listen to."

"Try me."

Jude told him everything from winning Instant Star up until Tommy's hospital stay, all while standing in the rain.

"Wow," he said when she finished. "No offense or anything, but that is messed up."

Jude smiled weakly. "Yeah, tell me about it. So, since I spilled my whole life story, could I at least get your name?"

"It's Turner, I'm 22, and I'm a first year med student."

"Interesting," she said through her chattering teeth.

"Let's get you inside," he said, turning her towards the doorway.

She obeyed reluctantly and handed his coat back to him once they were in the building. "Thanks."

"Hey, it's what I'm here for."

"I need to get back to Tommy."

"Yeah, that's fine. I'll see you around."

"Yeah. Later," she said as she retreated, once again, to Tommy's hospital room.


	53. Chapter 53

**Authors Note:** Sorry it took so long to update! I kept getting errors when I tried to update. Well, have fun reading this chapter, and read and review.

"Jude! Where have you been? You're all wet!" Sadie said.

"I was up on the roof."

"Do you realize it's ouring out?" Sadie scolded.

"Sadie, I'm fine okay. I just needed to get away to think."

"You're going to get sick if you don't chang out of these wet clothes."

"You sound like mom, and besides I really don't care anymore."

Sadie ignored what Jude was saying and handed her a pair of jeans and a white t-shirt. "Go change and go to the conference room. Leila and the doctors want to talk to you."

Jude quickly changed clothes and walked into the room. Two of Tommy's regular doctors and Leila were seated at a round table. "You uh, wanted to talk to me?"

"Jude, why don't you sit down?" Leila said.

"I think I'd rather stand. What's going?"

"Miss Harrison, you understand that Mr. Jack Quincy signed family rights over to you and do you understand what that means?"

Jude nodded her head. "It means, I choose if Tommy stays on life support or not."

"That's correct," the other doctor said. "We need to know what you want for him by tomorrow."

"T--tomorrow?"

"Jude, let's go somewhere we can talk," Leila said quietly grabbing her shoulder and shuffling her out of the room and to a couch in a secluded hallway.

"I don't want to make this decision. I can't Leila."

"Wether you want to or not, you have to."

"How do I choose wether or not to kill the one guy I love?"

"I don't know Jude, it's just something you have to do."

"Will he ever get better?" she asked timidly.

"He," Leila paused for a moment, to gather her thoughts. "No, and even if he would wake up, he'll never be the same Tommy. He'll lay in a vegetative state and he might know what's going on but chances are he won't."

"How can I live with myself if I choose to take him off life support."

"Jude, in a technical state, he's still alive, but in retrospect he's already gone. There is little to no brain activity."

Tears slid down Jude's cheeks. "Then I...I have to do it. I can't let him just lay there forever. He wouldn't want that."

"I'll let you go talk to everyone and let you say goodbye before I let the doctors know."

"Thanks."

"Don't worry about it," Leila said as she hugged Jude. "If it helps any, I think you're making the right decision for everyone."

Jude nodded and walked into the waiting room. Jack, Jessica, Andrew, Sadie, Kwest, Shay, and Portia all sat around the room. What she was going to say would change all of their lives forever. She had no desire to tell them what she had chosen to do, but she knew she had to."

"Everyone, I, I made the decision to take Tommy off life suport." She had told herself she wouldn't cry, but here she was with tears freely flowing.

Jessica was the first to speak. She stood up and held Jude in her arms. "It's okay sweetie," she said as she tried to calm the already sobbing girl. "Any one of us, in your position, would have done the same thing."

Jude ended the embrace and pulled Kwest aside while everyone started to say their goodbyes, one by one.

"Kwest, I, I need to know what Tommy said when he was awake."

"He said he loved you Jude," Kwest said, slightly choking up.

"Jude, it's your turn honey," Jessica said.

Jude knew Tommy had said more to Kwest and Portia but she turned and entered Tommy's room. She sat on the edge of the bed and helf his hand. "I'm not sure you can hear me, or even know that I'm here, but I love you so much Tommy. I don't want to let you go. If there was the slightest chance you could come back to me I wouldn't even think of doing this," she paused for a moment, her voice failing. "Quincy, I know you'd hate being like this for the rest of your life. I know you couldn't live without the music and I can't do that to you baby." She lifted his hand up and placed a kiss on the rough, paper-like skin. She thought about everything that had happened between them. The tense, awkward moments after she had won Instant Star, the kiss that had started everything on her sixteenth birthday, the tour that ended in shambles, the stay at the cabin, the sweet touches of a loving boyfriend to his girlfriend. Everything flooded back to her. She closed her eyes and saw his bright smile, his gorgeous blue eyes, his flirtatious being. Tears slipped past as she thought that there would be no more memories with Tommy, no more kisses, no more gentle, loving touches.

"Jude, it's time," Leila said as she walked over to Tommy and placed a hand on Jude's shoulder.

She shook her head for a few moments as the tears poured out. "No."

"Jude, you know this is for the best. Would you rather come visit him everyday for the rest of your life, and see him like this? Hooked up to machines, being alive, but not really?"

"No, but...I just, I love him so much Leila."

"I know you do honey."

Jude solemnly nodded and watched the doorway as everyone filed in, including Kat and Jamie. Jamie stood behind her, his hand on her shoulder, Kat beside him. Jude stood up and wrapped her arms around Jamie, her best friend. Jamie held her sobbing body as Kat looked on. She broke away from Jamie and hugged Kat. "Thanks for coming guys."

"Jude I'm so sorry," Kat said.

She nodded and sat down beside Tommy again.

The doctor came in and Leila began to turn machines off and take tubes out. Jude held his hand the entire time, vowing she wouldn't leave him to do this alone. The heart monitor scarcely beeped steadily for awhile until Tommy's heart gave out and the flat beep filled the room. Jude heard the gasps and sobs of everyone in the room. Leila quickly turned the beep of the machine off and left the room.

Jude squeezed his hand one last time and placed a kiss on his forehead. "Goodbye my sweet prince."

**Okay, now that you're going to kill me lolz...anyways, just go review please!**


	54. Chapter 54

Jude awoke two days later, not remembering much of the previous day's events. Tommy was gone, gone forever, and there was nothing she could do about it.

She woke up in Kwest and Sadie's apartment and lay in bed for awhile until she slowly dragged herself up and walked towards Tommy's room. She half expected him to open the door and pull her into a hug. She walked over to his bed, the sweet smell of his cologne wafting around the room, and sat down.

"Hey," Kwest said, leaning in the doorway.

"Hi."

"Miss him?"

"So much, that sometimes if I think about it too much, I wonder why I'm not dead."

Kwest wasn't sure what to respond with to her statement. It was full of pain and hurt, and anguish. "It's uh, nice to see you awake."

"Yeah, I uh, I think it would have been better if I stayed sleeping though. Dreams are better than reality."

"I have to agree with you on that one."

"Reality isn't fair."

"Nothing's fair Jude."

"Have they decided on a day for the funeral?"

"Day after tomorrow."

She twirled the ring on her finger that Tommy had given her on her birthday. So many promises, so many hopes and dreams that would never happen. "Counting the minutes," she said dryly.

"What's that?" Kwest asked, noticing the ring.

"It's just something Tommy gave me for my birthday Kwest."

"Let me see it."

Jude reluctantly took the ring off and handed it to Kwest.

"Jude, this is an engagement ring!"

"No it's not. It's a…it's a promise ring."

"Jude…" he trailed off.

"Don't Kwest," she said as she took the ring back and placed it on her finger.

"But," he was cut off.

"No!"

"Okay I'll stop. The press wants to attend the funeral."

"No! Not a chance. I will not let them turn Tommy's funeral into a media frenzy."

"I know and I promise to try my best to keep everyone out, but I'm not sure we can," Kwest said, looking up at Jude's crying eyes. "Look, Jude I didn't mean to make you cry, I just," Kwest paused.

"I miss him Kwest, so much. I don't know how I can do this."

"Jude," Kwest said, pulling her into a hug. "I'm not saying this will be easy, but you can get through it."

"No I can't, I loved him too much Kwest."

"You can never love someone too much Jude."

"We, Tommy said that we could get married once I was older, and now, now that will never happen all because of his brother's stupidity."

She cried on Kwest's shoulder for a few minutes until Sadie came into the room.

"I have some dinner made Jude."

"I'm not very hungry," she said quietly.

Kwest stood up, took hold of Sadie's hand and led her out of the room.

"She has to eat something Kwest."

"She will, just give her some time babe," Kwest said, brushing a stray hair away.

"Is it wrong to be mad at Tommy?"

"Maybe a little."

"He left Jude all by herself. He was it, he was her life Kwest."

"I know he was, but he didn't ask Ryan to shoot him."

"I know, I know, it's just that it's not fair. Tommy dies, and Ryan is out there running around."

"I know he is, but people are looking for him."

"Well apparently they're not looking hard enough!"

"Hey, what's wrong?"

"Nothing! I'm just mad at everything I guess."

"Are you sure?"

"I'm positive."

"Okay," Kwest wrapped her hand around her waist and they walked into the dining room.

The next day Kwest went to work and Sadie waited for Jude to wake up. Finally, at noon, Sadie walked into her room and dragged Jude out of bed.

"Sadie, what the hell!" she moaned.

"You need to get out of bed!"

"Why?" she sat up and glared at her older sister.

"Because I said so Jude!"

"You're not my mom!"

"Well Mom's not here right now is she? So someone has to take up her slack."

"I would really like to go back to sleep Sadie."

"Your point is?"

"Leave me alone!"

"Whatever Jude. You really think Tommy wants you to lay around and bitch to everyone? If you do, you're living in some alternate reality."

"Well Tommy's not here either is he!"

"Jude," Sadie started but was interrupted.

"No! Out of my room, now!"

Sadie stalked out of the room, with a defeated expression on her face. No matter what anyone said to Jude, nothing was going to change and Sadie knew that, but she thought she could at least try. She'd never seen her sister like this, not even when her parents divorced. She had gotten a phone call the day before that said Victoria had had a baby girl, but Sadie didn't tell anyone. Jude didn't need the burden of a new half-sister on top of her boyfriend dying.

**Authors Note: **_Thanks for all the reviews everyone! And I'm sorry to say that Tommy has left the building. He will not be reappearing, unless I put him in one of Jude's dreams. It's a possibility but I'm not really sure yet. I have to say, writing Tommy's death was really hard and I'm not sure I captured it really well, but I tried. Well, this fanfic is coming to an end...only about 3 more longish chapters...I hope lol. Sequel is pending at this moment :P _


	55. Chapter 55

The morning of Tommy's funeral, Jude was rummaging through her closet when Sadie entered the room in black palazzo pants with a black tank top and black shrug.

"Jude, we have to go in less than an hour and you're not even dressed yet."

"I don't have anything to wear."

"I know that's not true."

"I don't want to go okay!" Jude yelled. "I want to fall asleep and never wake up!"

Sadie walked to the closet, grabbed a short black dress with a satin jack and threw them at Jude. "Get dressed and meet us in the living room," Sadie ordered as she left the room.

Jude reluctantly dressed in the clothes Sadie had thrown at her. She pulled her hair into a low ponytail and omitted all make-up except mascara. She looked at her pale face in the mirror and turned away when she saw a faint figure beside her, who looked unmistakenly like Tommy. She flung around and saw nothing. There was no Tommy. Tommy was dead, gone, a figment of her imagination now.

"Jude, it's time to go," Kwest said.

They drove to the church in a G Major limo, the same one Tommy and Jude had taken to the airport when they went to Hawaii. Jude was quiet the entire drive. Her mind was closed to everything and she didn't want to go to the funeral, she didn't want to see Tommy's body.

They arrived at the church and were instantly bombarded by paparrazi flashbulbs. Kwest grabbed Jude and Sadie and made their way through the crowd. Once they were inside the church Jude was hugged by almost everyone.

She wouldn't let the tears fall, not when so many people were watching her.

"Hi," a voice came behind her.

She turned around. "Hi Turner."

He gave her a friendly hug and said, "I'm really sorry Jude."

"Thanks. I"m kind of surprised to see you here."

"I uh, I came with Leila. She's over talking to some people."

"Oh."

"I should probably go find her. I'll talk to you later," he said as he walked away.

"Turner, thanks for coming," she called.

"Anytime."

Sadie, Kwest, and Jude were seated behind Tommy's family, with the other G Major employees. She played with the ring through the entire service as the priest went on and on about Tommy's life, when he hadn't even known him.

After the service, Jude cautiously walked towards the coffin. Slow tears trickled down her face as she looked at the pale, thin body, that used to be Tommy. She felt around in her pocket and pulled out a silver engagement band and slipped it on his wedding finger.

"I'll never forget. I love you Tommy Quincy," she whispered as she walked away and was driven to the cemetary.

Jude wasn't paying attention to what was going on at the cemetary. She felt cold and hollow, like nothing mattered anymore. Even when Jessica and Andrew and came up and hugged her, she didn't even care, she couldn't anymore.

After the priest was done speaking and people started clearing out, she felt Kwest's light grip on her arm, leading her back to the limo, which would take them back to the apartment. She snapped out of her sense of shock and looked at Kwest.

"Let go," she said firmly.

"What?" Kwest asked.

"I can't leave him."

"Jude, we have to go."

"No!"

**Authors Note: **Short I know, fast moving, yes I know but that's the only thing I could come up with. Sorry it took so long to get a chapter up. Been super super super busy! Remember when I said one or two more chapters and this was over? Well I kinda lied...I'm thinkin it's gonna be more like three or four more chapters. Anyways, R/R please!


	56. Chapter 56

Kwest firmly slipped his arm around her shoulder and put her into the limo, Sadie trailing behind.

"What's going on?" she asked after Kwest had shut the door.

"I think it's finally sinking in that she'll never see him again."

After Sadie and Kwest entered the limo, they were escorted to the apartment and Jude retreated to her room, without talking to anyone. She changed into a blakc pair of Tommy's boxers and a white beater while she proceeded to sit down at her computer. She hadn't checked her e-mail since before they had left for Hawaii and a blinking "new mail" box instantle popped up as soon as she turned the computer on.

She filtered through hundreds of junk mail before she came across one from Tommy.

Jude,

I can't believe we're actually going to Hawaii. I wouldn't be e-mailing you but you were just complaining you never got any so I thought I'd try to make you happy. Love you girl.

Tommy

Slow tears fell down her cheeks and her eyesight blurred while she read the short note. She heard a knock on the door and looked up.

"Go away!"

"Jude?"

"Speed," she said quickly wiping her eyes.

"Hi. I uh hope you don't mind that I stopped by."

"No, it's fine. I was just working on some stuff." Speed closed the door behind him and sat on the bed. "Sorry the guys and I didn't get to talk to you at the funeral."

"I'm glad you came," Jude said, looking at the floor.

"How are you doing?"

"Honest answer?"

"Yes."

"Not so good, but hey, it's expected."

"I guess," Speed said quietly.

They sat in silence for awhile until Speed started to speak.

"Jude, I'm really sorry."

"It sucks Speed. One minute, I'm in Hawaii, having the time of my life, and the next I'm back in Toronto, and I've just been to my boyfriend's funeral. What 17-year-old do you know, that has had to do that?"

"Not many I guess."

"Exactly."

"Do you think you'll come back to the studio anytime soon?" he ventured.

"I don't know Speed."

"Everyone misses you."

"I know. I just don't know if I can do it yet."

"I should probably get going," Speed said as he awkwardly hugged Jude.

"Thanks for coming," she said in a faint whisper.

Speed nodded and left the room while Jude crawled into bed, disregarding the fact that it was only three in the afternoon.

"Jude."

"Leave me alone."

"Jude, it's me."

"Oh my god," she said, opening her eyes. She was in a white room, and the person who stood before her, shocked her.

A hand reached over and brushed her hair out of her eyes.

"But you, you're not here. Tommy..."

"Sweetie, you're dreaming."

"So you, you're still,"

He nodded and looked into her glistening sea green eyes.

"I'm sorry Tommy. I, I didn't want to do it."

"It was for the best, you know that."

"If this is a dream, I never want to wake up Tommy. I miss you."

"Don't say that. You have to go on Jude."

"I don't want to," she argued.

He put his finger against her lips. She watched him curiously through her tear-filled eyes.

"Thank you for the ring Jude," he said, taking her hand.

"Don't leave Tommy. Don't leave me again."

"Jude, I wish I didn't have to, but you know I do. I'm just a dream."

"No!"

"Jude, don't make this any harder than it already is. You know I love you and anytime you want to talk to me, you can.,"

"It's not the same."

"I know, but you have to make do with it."

"I love you."

"I'll be back Jude. I'll come back," he said, drifting out of sight.

"No!" she said. "No, no no," she repeated aloud.

"Jude, wake up," Sadie said.

"What?"

"You were sleeping and screaming. What's wrong?"

"Nothing, I just, I'm not really sure."

"Okay. Are you sure?"

"Yeah. What time is it?"

"7:30. Jude are you positive you're okay?"

"Yeah, positive," she said in a daze.

Sadie looked at her for awhile before leaving the room. Jude kept sitting on her bed, grasping at straws, trying to figure out what the dream meant. Tommy had looked so handsome. His brown hair, neatly in place, his sparkling eyes. He had this white glow around him. She pondered a few things for a moment until she went to take a shower.

By the time she had finished her shower and put a pair of pajamas on, it was 8:30 and she had decided to go to bed.

Authors Note: Last 2-3 chapters up this weekend sometime!


	57. Chapter 57

The next morning, she opened her eyes and the room started spinning. Her stomach turned as she truggled to sit up. A wave of nausea flooded over her body and she ran to the bathroom.

After what seemed like hours, she stood up from her kneeling spot by the toilet bowl, and cleaned herself up. She splashed cool water over her pale face before slowly walking to her room and getting dressed.

She walked into the kitchen and Sadie was making breakfast.

"Hey. Good morning."

"Uh, morning," she said, as the scent filled her nostrils, bringing another bout of nausea upon her body.

"Something wrong? You look sick."

"Yeah, I think it's the flu or something. I'm just uh going to go to bed."

"Okay."

Kwest passed Jude on his way to the kitchen and carefully eyed Sadie. "What's wrong?"

"She said she has the flu."

"Oh, okay," he said, wrapping his arms around her thin waist.

"Kwest, I'm trying to make breakfast."

"I know that," he said, nuzzling her neck.

"Knock it off!" she giggled.

"Here," he held out a small black box.

Sadie dropped her spatula at the sight of the box. "Wh...Kwest, what is that?"

He slowly knelt down in front of her and grabbed her hand, before he opened the box. "Sadie Marie Harrison, will you marry me?" he asked with a smile.

"Yes!" she pulled him up and wrapped her arms around his neck.

He picked her up and spun her around, before speaking. "After Tommy's death, I realize that I love you and life's too short to lose you."

"I love you too Kwest."

"Do you want to tell Jude or not?"

"Not yet," Sadie shook her head. "It's too soon. Let's just keep it between ourselves."

"Fine with me."

After a week, Jude was still not feeling any better and Kwest entered the bathroom when he heard her gagging.

"Jude, are you okay?" he asked.

"I'm fine," she said, out of breath.

Kwest opened the door and saw Jude hunched over the toilet.

"You're fine alright," Kwest said, kneeling down beside her and pulled her hair back. Her face was pale and dripping with perspiration.

"I am," she said before she threw up again.

"Yeah," Kwest said as he rubbed her back.

After the nausea passed, she sat down and leaned back against the wall.

"Jude..."

"What?"

"Let's get you back to bed," he said as he picked her up and carried her back to her room.

Once Jude was back in bed, Kwest left to find Sadie.

"Sades, honey," he said as he gently shook her sleeping body. "You gotta wake up."

"Why?" she whined.

"Jude's still sick."

Sadie groaned, pulled herself out of bed, and walked into Jude's room. "Hey, Kwest said you were still sick."

"I'm fine."

"You look pale."

"So what? You should just go back to sleep Sadie."

"Jude, I'm not so sure you're really sick."

"What do you mean?" she asked.

"You haven't been eating, you're throwing up, you're crabby one minute and crying the next..."

"My boyfriend just died Sadie!"

"I know, but Jude, I, I think you're pregnant."

"What? Sadie, are you nuts?"

"Jude, I'm serous."

"I can't be pregnant Sadie."

"I'll be right back."

Sadie came back into the room carrying a small cardboard box.

"Where did you get that?"

"Long story. Just go," Sadie handed her the pregnancy test.

Jude eyed her curiously before taking the box and going into the bathroom.

Kwest walked into the room when Jude closed the bathroom door.

"What's going on?"

"I think she's pregnant."

"What? Do you think it's?"

"Ryan's? I don't know," she said, as she knocked on the door. "Jude?"

Sadie heard something crash to the floor and quickly opened the door. She picked up the positive pregnancy test and looked at Jude.

"This isn't happening Sades. Not now."

Kwest looked on from the bathroom, keeping his distance from the sisters.

"Is it for sure Ryan's?"

Jude shook her head. "No."

Kwest swore under his breath. "Dammit Tommy. What were you thinking?"

"You had sex with Tommy?"

Jude nodded and looked at the floor.

"Jude," Sadie said as she hugged her sister again.

"What am I going to do Sadie?"

"I don't know Jude."

The next day Turner and Leila stopped by before their plane left. Jude told them both everything soon after they had arrived.

"What are you going to do?" Leila asked.

"I don't know. I'm 17, pregnant, and my boyfriend just died."

"I'm really sorry Jude," Turner said.

"It's not really something to be sorry about, but thanks anyways."

"I have to go back today," Leila said. "Autumn's getting sick of my Mom taking care of her, but Turner is staying another week."

"Yeah, I can stop by and visit.

"And you know I'll call."

"Thanks you guys," she hugged Leila and Turner.

"But right now, Turner has to give me a ride to the airport. We'll talk soon okay?"

"Yeah, bye."

Turner and Jude ended up becoming good friends before he had to go back to Hawaii. He would stop by at least once everyday, usually around lunch when both Kwest and Sadie were at work, and he would keep her company. She said a tearful goodbye to him the day he left.

"Bye Turner. Thanks for everything."

"Hey don't worry. I'll try to come visit sometime soon."

"Bye."

That night, Jude and Sadie were curled up on the couch watching a movie when the phone rang. Kwest reached for the phone on the table and answered it.

"Hello."

"Kwest," came Victoria Harrison's sultry voice.

"Mrs. Harrison."

"I would like to speak to one of my daughters. Preferably Jude."

"I don't think so."

"What?"

"Jude and Sadie don't want to talk to you."

"I want them to come see their new baby sister. I'm in Toronto."

"Whoa, baby?"

"Turner and I have just had a baby girl."

"Turner?"

"My boyfriend Turner. He's a med student in Hawaii and he met me in Toronto to pick up the baby."

Kwest slammed the phone on the hook. Turner, the so-called friend of Jude's was Victoria's boyfriend. As if it wasn't bad enought that her boyfriend had died, and she was pregnant, but now part of her support syster was banging her Mom.

"Kwest, who was that?" Sadie asked quietly.

"Your Mom."

"What did she want?"

"I don't think you want to know."

"Kwest," she said in a firm voice.

"She wanted you and Jude to come see Turner and the baby."

"Turner? You mean the guy that was in our house and called Jude from Hawaii."

"He's not in Hawaii, he's in Toronto."

"Isn't that just lovely," she sighed as she sat down at the table.

"What are we going to do?"

"What do you mean?"

"I mean with Jude."

"To be honest, I don't know. She hasn't even really mentioned the baby."

"She's 17 Sadie, I'm sure she's a bit overwhelmed. I just hope she doesn't do anything stupid."

"If she was going to, she would have done it already. Tommy's been gone for almost a month."

"I know, and if she wouldn't be pregnant I wouldn't be worrying, but thinka bout what's going through her head," Kwest said.

"We'll just have to keep an eye on her," Sadie said.

Kwest nodded as Sadie heard Jude gagging in the bathroom. "I'll go," she said.


	58. Chapter 58

The next few days started out the exactly the same, with Jude hugging the toilet bowl. She was even more sick than when she found out she was pregnant. Either Kwest or Sadie would go in and keep an eye on her. Once she was done, Sadie would get her to drink some water and Jude would sleep on and off for the rest of the day.

One afternoon she fell asleep watching a soap opera and she heard Tommy's voice again.

"Hey girl."

"Tommy."

"I'm just a dream again sweetheart."

"I, I know," she said quietly.

"I miss you so much girl."

Tears flowed freely down her face. They were in the same white room as before. "I miss you too."

"You have to take care of yourself girl. You're losing more weight everyday."

"I can't do anything without you Tommy."

"Don't say that," he reached for her hand.

"Why not? I want to die, I want to be with you!"

"Jude Harrison! I never ever want to hear you say that again. You don't have just yourself to think about anymore."

"Y...you know?"

"Of course I know. I watch you every minute of every day."

"I don't wnat a baby Tommy! I'm seventeen!"

"I know girl," Tommy hung his head in shame. "I'm sorry. I never meant for you to get pregnant."

"Why did you go?"

"I had no choice Jude, you know that."

"I don't want to wake up Tommy."

"You have to. This is the last time I can visit you."

"No!"

"I'm sorry Jude. There's nothing I can do about it."

"I can't raise a baby by myself Tommy."

"Jude, look around you for once. Sadie and Kwest, Kat and Jamie, even Speed, they're all willing to help you."

"Well I don't want a baby without you."

"You know I wish I could be there. Be able to hold my son or daughter right after he or she is born. Be able to look at my glowing fiance, wake up in the middle of the night, just to watch our baby sleep. I would give anything to be able to hold you every night."

Tears flowed down Jude's face as Tommy kept talking.

"Everyday, I have to watch you throw your life away and it hurts Jude. Especially since I'm the cause of it."

"Your not the cause of it."

"No? Then why do you lie in bed everyday? You haven't wrote a song or been to the studio in weeks, because of me."

"That's not true!" Jude cried.

"Yes it is and you know it!"

"So maybe it partly is Tommy, but what am I supposed to do? Forget about the man I love and jump on the first guy I meet."

Pain coursed through Tommy as he thought of another man touching Jude. "That's not what I'm saying at all."

"Then what are you saying?"

"I'm saying that nothing is supposed to be easy. I'm outright saying, this sucks. I'm saying I love you and I want you to be happy, and stop being so ddamn stubborn for once!"

"Fine!"

"Jude, this is the last time we can ever speak like this. Don't be mad at me."

"I'm not mad."

"Sure."

"Okay Tommy, I'll go to the studio if that's what's going to make you happy."

"A little bit. I'm not asking you to forget about me. I'm just telling you to take care of yourself and the baby. Don't let yourself be like this for the rest of your life."

"I don't plan on it Tommy."

"Then promise me you'll start taking care of yourself and start talking to your friends."

"I promise."

"Good. Remember I'll always love you," he started to walk away.  
"You can't go already."

"I have to."

"I love you Tommy."

With that, Jude woke up and walked into the kitchen.

"Hey," Sadie greeted her. "Feeling any better?"

"A little bit."

"Think you can eat something?"

"Yeah," she said quietly.

Sadie grabbed a box of poptarts from the top shelf and popped two in the toaster, before she joined Jude at the counter.

"Georgia called earlier."

"Yeah?"

"She wanted to know how you were and if you wanted to stop by the studio sometime."

"I think I'm going to go in tomorrow."

Sadie was shocked by her answer and looked at her quizzically. "What's gotten into you?"

"A visit from a friend."

* * *

**And that everyone is the end! Wow, I had so much fun writing this, and I got over 200 reviews, which is awesome. Thanks everyone for sticking with it as long as you did! I'm hoping everyone liked it. I left the ending wide open because there will be a sequel, but probably not anytime soon. I have another really good idea for a new IS fic, so keep on the lookout for more stuff by me! Review and lemme know what you thought of this chapter and the story on a whole!**


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